lover of my soul

Psalm 89:14-18

2012-01-31T17:36:00.001-08:00

14 Righteousness and justice are the foundation of your throne;
   love and faithfulness go before you.
15 Blessed are those who have learned to acclaim you,
   who walk in the light of your presence, LORD.
16 They rejoice in your name all day long;
   they celebrate your righteousness.
17 For you are their glory and strength,
   and by your favor you exalt our horn.[d]
18 Indeed, our shield[e] belongs to the LORD,
   our king to the Holy One of Israel.

God Gave Ducks Wings to Fly

2012-01-29T01:59:00.001-08:00

A parable is told of a community of ducks waddling off to duck church one Sunday to hear their duck preacher. After they waddled into the duck sanctuary, the service began and the duck preacher spoke eloquently of how God had given the ducks wings with which to fly.

He pounded the pulpit with his beak and said, “With these wings, there is nowhere we ducks can not go!

”There is no God-given task we ducks cannot accomplish!

”With these wings we no longer need walk through life. We can soar high in the sky!”

Shouts of “Amen!¨ were quacked throughout the duck congregation.

The duck preacher concluded his message by exclaiming, “With our wings we can fly through life! WE CAN FLY!!!!¨

More ducks quacked out loud “AMEN!” in response.

Every duck loved the service.

In fact all the ducks that were present commented on what a wonderfully convicting message they had heard from their duck preacher....and then they left the church and waddled all the way home.

Too often we waddle away from worship the same way we waddled in....unchanged.

Courageous

2012-01-28T02:31:00.001-08:00

Nutrition

2012-01-27T01:56:00.001-08:00

2012-01-19T02:53:00.001-08:00

D. A. Carson writes,

To approach the Bible correctly it is important to know something of the God who stands behind it. God is both transcendent (i.e., he is "above" space and time) and personal. He is the sovereign and all-powerful Creator to whom the entire universe owes its existence, yet he is the God who graciously condescends to interact with human beings whom he has himself formed in his own image.
Because we are locked in time and space, God meets us here; he is the personal God who interacts with other persons, persons he has made to glorify him and to enjoy him forever. . . .
The point to emphasize is that a genuinely Christian understanding of the Bible presupposes the God of the Bible, a God who makes himself known in a wide diversity of ways so that human beings may know the purpose for which they were made — to know and love and worship God, and so delight in that relationship that God is glorified while they receive the matchless benefit of becoming all that God wants them to be.

Relationally Intentional

2012-01-18T20:28:00.000-08:00

"Do nothing from selfishness or empty conceit, but with humility of mind regard one another as more important than yourselves; do not merely look out for your own personal interests, but also for the interests of others." Philippians 2:3-4

Instead of thinking about ourselves, we are to extend ourselves for others around us. How often do we only pray for ourselves? How often are we too busy with our own lives to care about the trials of others. We are to intentionally relate and connect with others by showing compassion. When Jesus was off busy going about his ministry, he would stop to listen to those who needed comfort. He went out of his way to be with people in their need. In the same way, we are to reach out towards others. Sometimes the best way to be there for people is to just listen to them. Have you ever had so much to talk about, with no one to talk to? Listen to what others want to share. And if the Holy Spirit leads us to speak into their life and circumstance, by all means encourage them. "Let us not love with words and speech but also in deed and action." 1 John 3:18 "If anyone forces you to go one mile, go with them two miles." Matt 5:41

Take the initiative to greet someone. Take the initiative to ask how people are. Where there is pain in their life, guide them to the Healer. We are flooded with opportunities. Sometimes it's a simple phone call. Sometimes it's a simple prayer. Serve, sacrifice, and love one another. Consider others more important than yourselves and point them to Jesus.

2012-01-09T02:15:00.000-08:00

Discipline without Desire is Drudgery
Desire without Discipline is Disappointment
Discipline and Desire is Delight

Christians shouldn't be able to contain their joy
Our delight in God should be highly explosive and contagious!

"Restore to me the joy of Your salvation And sustain me with a willing spirit." Psalm 51:12

"Your words became for me a joy and the delight of my heart" Jeremiah 15:16

paul washeraf

2012-01-08T23:03:00.001-08:00

2012-01-07T19:38:00.001-08:00

Compassion

2012-01-07T14:25:00.000-08:00

“Then the King will say to those on His right, ‘Come, you who are blessed of My Father, inherit the kingdom prepared for you from the foundation of the world. For I was hungry, and you gave Me something to eat; I was thirsty, and you gave Me something to drink; I was a stranger, and you invited Me in; naked, and you clothed Me; I was sick, and you visited Me; I was in prison, and you came to Me.’ Then the righteous will answer Him, ‘Lord, when did we see You hungry, and feed You, or thirsty, and give You something to drink? And when did we see You a stranger, and invite You in, or naked, and clothe You? When did we see You sick, or in prison, and come to You?’ The King will answer and say to them, ‘Truly I say to you, to the extent that you did it to one of these brothers of Mine, even the least of them, you did it to Me.’ Matt. 25:34-40

http://www.compassion.com/default.htm

http://ijm.org/

Where God Guides, God Provides

2011-12-26T02:05:00.000-08:00

Usually waiting for something is worth it. But have you ever waited and waited, to find out that you really didnt need the thing you were waiting for? The thing you wanted most, somehow became average. Sometimes it's like ordering your favorite meal. Then one day, it just doesn't seem so appealing anymore. Maybe you over exaggerated how great it was. Perhaps it really was that great, but then your taste or perspective changed. I know this happens to me with video games. For 6 months i'll salivate over a new video game coming out. I'll read all the reviews, watch trailers and get extremely excited about it. Then when it comes out, i play it for 2 hours and say "meh, it's alright."

My point is that sometimes we chase after things. We sometimes chase after things that aren't really the best for us. We chase and chase, when in actuality it may not be right for us to have. Even though a boat has long sailed away, i kept my eyes on it. I kept dreaming of riding the ocean seas on this boat. I figured if i was stubborn enough, had enough patience, and just tried really hard to catch up to the boat, then maybe i'd get a chance to get on board. God wisely placed strong waves to keep hitting me back. This boat is obviously not something for my best, nor for God's utmost glory. Therefore, i realized i need to submit to God's waves.

Sometimes ill be paddling so hard to get out further out in the ocean, then suddenly a huge wave just swipes me away in the opposite direction. In fact, sometimes waves are so powerful that they take you whether or not you wanted to catch it or not. In this illustration, if the waves represent God's sovereign will; we are to catch these waves and surf in God's Spirit. Never fight or go against God's leading Spirit. Humble yourself and conform your will to His.

Sometimes God doesn't even give you a clear destination, because he wants you to embrace and enjoy the present riding experience. Maybe the point is to find satisfaction in the process. Perhaps this is where the transformation takes place. Trust in His sovereignty, provision, and find communion with Him. Sometimes you'll fall off that wave. And it'll be tempting to start going in your own direction again. However, if God brings another big wave, start paddling to catch it. Where is God guiding today?

Where you go, I'll go
Where you stay, I'll stay
When you move, I'll move
I will follow you
Who you love, I'll love
How you serve I'll serve
If this life I lose, I will follow you
I will follow you

Death

2011-12-23T14:42:00.000-08:00

I just watched a movie called 50/50. It’s about a guy named Adam, who is dealing with cancer. This movie did a great job displaying the relational and emotional dynamics of someone who is possibly facing terminal cancer. Besides his own response to the cancer, it was interesting to see how those around him tried to cope with his situation. His girlfriend was more concerned about how hard it was for her and only pretended to care. She was the most unresponsive character because she didn’t want to deal with any of it and wasn't really there for him in his need. His mother seemed overly concerned and dramatic, which kind of pushed Adam away from even talking to her. His best friend tried to down play the circumstance by having fun and not taking it too seriously. The therapist in the movie seemed to approach Adam’s cancer the best by trying to draw out his thoughts and feelings. She was patient, understanding and reaffirming. Adam seemed indifferent, aloof and apathetic.. He couldn’t believe this was his reality. Adam seemed to withhold his emotions internally because he wasn't quite sure how to express his frustration.

This movie really hit a sensitive spot. Most people don’t like to bring up the topic of death. It can be a sad topic, but that doesn’t mean we should completely ignore the reality of it. This movie did a great job not only showing how much pain and hurt cancer brought to Adam, but also to his family and friends.

I asked my Dad yesterday, “What do you say to someone who has just lost a loved one?” He said, “There really isn’t anything you can say to make things better.” Most people usually give their condolences by saying that their “sorry for their lost.”

Last semester I took a pastoral care and counseling class. Our professor taught us that when someone has just gone through a traumatic experience, sometimes the best thing to do is to just be with them. Support them by mourning and grieving with them. If you didn’t know the person who pasted away, you could ask, “Tell me more about them. What were they like?” This allows one to reflect back on the good memories and qualities instead of the present and future heartache. Death can be a time to cherish and celebrate the life of an individual.

Our professor also taught us how important it is to listen and to reflect the same intensity. In 50/50, no one could reflect the same intensity that he was experiencing. Being able to describe one’s feelings accurate really helps one to feel that their understood. What seemed most helpful about the class was that a counselor’s goal isn’t to just give someone the quick answer fix that you would do in a given situation, but do guide them towards God and allow God to lead them to the right response. Genuine patience, compassion, and concern help one to feel that their situation and feelings are valid.

For the Christian death is seen in a different light. Yes, death is painful no matter how you see it. Death is the result of our world’s sin. However, the good and great news is that there is not only life through Christ, but there is eternal life with Christ. Death is not the end for the believer. Christ has conquered sin and death on the cross. There is victory, salvation and life in His name. In the completion of God’s kingdom of Heaven, there is no more pain, no more suffering, no more sorrow and no more sin. For the Christian there is peace because whether we live or die we have the assurance that we will be with Him.

tumblr

2011-12-13T02:39:00.001-08:00

http://brothatsmybacon.tumblr.com/

Emotional Break Down!

2011-12-12T03:21:00.000-08:00

These past few weeks have seemed so busy that i've been having a hard time slowing down. I've been sleeping at 5-6am. I feel like it's so easy to freak out and worry about stuff. It's been hard to keep centered on Christ. I have this tendency to begin relying on myself and my own strength. That's normally when things go wrong. Lately i've also been getting angry at myself because i suck at making decisions. My recent days have been filled with bad decisions or no decisions. I get mad at myself when i waste time doing nothing productive. I'm an expert at wasting time. I feel like we only have so much time in this life, that we can only really invest ourselves in a few things. I ask myself what are those things? We'll it's easy to answer, "Oh God is most important! durr!" However, has my time and recent lifestyle reflected that?

It's easy to sing songs, "All I want is you Jesus, You're all I need, You're my everything, You're my all in all" and yet throughout the week I can't even remember the last time i sat down just to spend time with my God. Sometimes we hafta stop and ask, "Hey is Jesus really my greatest desire? And if not, what's competing against it?" We're always busy moving around trying to get stuff accomplished, sleeping, or we're plopped down in front of our laptops. Where exactly does Jesus fit into our busy schedules? I'm not saying we need to spend hours and hours a day doing spiritual disciplines, but at the same time do we have any spiritual disciplines going on? My spiritual life has been starving lately and it desperately needs to be nourished.

This week i went to a biola chapel, and worshiping with other believers was quite refreshing. Simple yet deep. As Christians we shouldn't just draw power from God, but we should also draw power, energy, and strength from fellowship with one another.

It can be so easy to put God off sometimes. Most of the time we don't even realize it. Other times it seems like a challenge to open God's Word and to pray. Why!? Shouldn't it be our joy? Shouldn't we be constantly craving this deep intimacy with our God? Isn't His love the most intense burning we've experienced? And yet i still find myself turning to other idols, why! Gosh i hate my sin so much. You know that feeling inside where u feel like your missing something, or maybe your day just feels off? I believe everyday we are in dire need of a spiritual renewal and internal transformation.

When we're tired we choose a cup of coffee over His strengthening Spirit. When we're hungry we choose food over a feast of His Word. When we're depressed we isolate ourselves rather than finding comfort in God. When we're bored we turn the tv on instead of communicating with God. I'm not saying that it's wrong to do those things, however does it ever cross our mind to turn to God for strength instead of some other activity? Shouldn't He be our greatest source of satisfaction? Make the most of every opportunity to serve, love, and worship.

At church i kind of had an emotional break down, cuz sometimes i feel like i really suck at being a leader. It's so much easier being a follower! I usually know when i completely blow a sermon and crash it into the ground. Sometimes i hear myself talking and ask myself "What the heck are you saying Chris! You sound like an idiot!" Then i just keep fumbling my words and just want to curl up into a ball and cry. I learned that instead of gaining self-confidence, i need God-confidence. Instead of relying on my own efforts to prepare and perform things, I need to depend on His Spirit and on others. I am thankful that i am surrounded with people who care enough to encourage me and pray for me when i'm down. So thanks chingus if ur reading this!

One thing that's recently been stressing me out is that both my roommates have a bad case of scabies. So i'm doin my best to stayed locked in my room. I think it's super gross cuz their always itchy and scratching. Then just thinking about it i begin to think i have it and get itchy. God i really don't want to get scabies! ahh! I jus want to go home to hawaii, chill at the beach and then freeze time.

"Be very careful, then, how you live not as unwise but as wise, making the most of every opportunity, because the days are evil. Therefore do not be foolish, but understand what the Lord’s will is." -Eph 5:15-17

"May the Lord make your love increase and overflow for each other and for everyone else, just as ours does for you. May he strengthen your hearts so that you will be blameless and holy in the presence of our God and Father when our Lord Jesus comes with all his holy ones." 1 Thess. 3:12-13

You're Beautiful

2011-12-01T00:32:00.001-08:00

Use Words and Proclaim the Gospel

2011-11-28T21:18:00.000-08:00

A Walk With God

2011-11-10T16:50:00.000-08:00

In Hawaii i used to take a lot more walks. Things weren't as busy over there. In Cali i haven't taken many walks around my neighborhood or explored many parks. It seems every time i intentionally try to meet with God while taking a walk, he immediately shows up and begins speaking to me in a variety of ways. The tough part is just to get my shoes on, throw a jacket on and get outside.

I often find myself caught and trapped in different worlds. What i mean by that, is that we often get lost in movies, tv, video games, entertainment, dreams, ambitions, school, work, technology, internet distractions, etc. For instance, when we walk into a mall, we are entering a world and culture that tells us what to worship and value. We are bombarded with things to buy, food, clothes, and shiny things. I'm not saying malls are bad, but why do we place so much value on having and possessing stuff. Another good example is the internet. There's facebook, email, youtube, music, hulu and other medias. We can easily be consumed by entertainment. There is a place and time for these things. I know i spend way too much time being on my laptop, when there is a world of beauty out there.

Today my goal was to get lost in God and to be consumed by Him. Sometimes we can't find the right radio frequency because of other distracting noises. Taking a walk allows one to get out of the house and to tune everything else out. Taking a walk allows one to observe nature. And creation seems to shout glory to God. For instance, as i was walking i saw a bunch of maple leaves on the ground. They were shades of red, orange, yellow, brown and green. They were all vivid colors and of all sorts of shapes and sizes. So i decided to stop and draw a couple, lol. i also saw this funny little squirrel, he was a fast little buggah. Stop to admire the beauty of life and then praise the Artist.

I thought it was interesting that what God's message for me was to learn how to listen and receive from Him. He was teaching me how to slow down, stop and take time out of our busy schedules to intentionally meet and commune with Him. Every moment we are given the opportunity to interact and participate in an intimate relationship with Him. Why not seize each moment to experience God to our fullest? How often are we receptive to the illumination of His Spirit? Do we have the eyes and ears to see and hear what God has in store for us today? Do we intentionally set aside time to invest in relationships with other people? Is it a priority and desire to enjoy fellowship, edify the church body, and worship with other believers? Where has our heart been lately?

Sometimes i can easily get caught up with knowledge and academic raw theology concepts. There's a place for that, but it can be useless without practical and personal application to our lives. Sometimes we need to stop and experience God's truths in our lives. We need to try to embrace His grace and absorb His love like a huge sponge. It usually results in an attitude of thankfulness and uncontainable joy.

Anyways, as i was walking i stopped on a curb in the neighborhood. I began to notice the cool wind surround me and rushing through the green trees. I took a deep breath and felt the fullness of being in God's presence. It's so much easier to encounter God in solitude. It was refreshing to find rest and peace in Him. I always found it interesting how much Jesus emphasized community and fellowship and yet He would often retreat to solitude. We too are to escape to God as our hiding place.

Wait upon God. Be ready and available to Him. Clear out the distractions buzzing in your head and get lost in God. Surrender any idols, confess sin. Cast your burdens upon Him, find refuge in Him, and give Him your entire heart. See the world as a child, cry out to Him and receive from our Abba, Father. Trust in His faithfulness, taste His goodness. Let gratitude draw you closer to this deep well of joy. Feast on His Word. Let the richness of His perfect, infinite, unconditional and explosive love satisfy your soul. Simply receive from Him. Do you hear Him calling? Can you hear His voice whispering? What is He speaking to you? Can you feel His relentless longing for you? Delight in Him, praise Him for all that He is, glorify Him for His sovereignty, rejoice in the salvation of the cross, dance in His freedom, become consumed in awe, and abide in Him.

God's Will

2011-11-06T23:38:00.000-08:00

For a long time i wanted something. I wanted it so bad. I thought that because i desired it so much for so long that perhaps it was God's will for me to go after it. However, sometimes God purposely removes a piece of candy away from a baby. As our Father, He knows what's best for us. He knows us better than we know ourselves. He clearly gave me a red light, but i wanted to run the light anyway. For awhile, my heart wanted to challenge God's will. God's will usually seems to be the more difficult decision, and yet it also happens to be the right decision. In faith, we must trust in His sovereignty, His love, provision and guidance; for He is always holy, righteous and faithful.

Instead of just listening to our heart, we must stop, discern and listen to God's will. Our heart can often mislead and deceive us. In discerning God's will, I learned to seek wise counsel of others, patiently offer my request to God in prayer, and to listen to both God's written and spoken word. What is on your heart? Does it distract your attention and affection away from God or draw you closer to Him? May the God of comfort and peace whisper to your heart.

Psalm 77:11-15

2011-11-05T00:56:00.001-07:00

¹¹ I shall remember the deeds of the LORD;
Surely I will remember Your wonders of old.
¹² I will meditate on all Your work
And muse on Your deeds.
¹³ Your way, O God, is holy;
What god is great like our God?
¹⁴ You are the God who works wonders;
You have made known Your strength among the peoples.
¹⁵ You have by Your power redeemed Your people,

Getting Into the Stride of God

2011-10-31T03:47:00.000-07:00

"The test of a man's religious life and character is not what he does in the exceptional moments of life, but what he does in the ordinary times, when there is nothing tremendous or exciting on. The worth of a man is revealed in his attitude to ordinary things when he is not before the footlights. It is a painful business to get through into the stride of God, it means getting your second wind spiritually. In learning to walk with God there is always the difficulty of getting into His stride; but when we have got into it, the only characteristic that manifests itself is the life of God. The individual man is lost sight of in his personal union with God, and the stride and the power of God alone are manifested." -Oswald Chambers

Forgiveness

2011-10-26T21:27:00.000-07:00

"In spiritual relationship we do not grow step by step; we are either there or we are not. God does not cleanse us more and more from sin, but when we are in the light, walking in the light, we are cleansed from all sin." -Oswald Chambers

"If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness." -1 John 1:9

Today one of our cats, snowball ran away. i was super bummed. But then while i was walkin to the kitchen, i saw his little funny face and sad blue eyes looking in through the screen door. He confessed his disobedience and for runnin away from home, and we accepted our prodigal cat back with love, joy n' grace. (o:

David Garibaldi

2011-10-18T18:45:00.000-07:00

"American Beauty"

2011-10-07T03:45:00.000-07:00

I just finished watching a movie called "American Beauty." It demonstrated that life can be empty without loving each other. It was a good negative example of how families don't know how to treat each other. It threw in a lot of dynamics about how people see the world and those around them. It displayed some of the difficulties in life and how different people handle social pressures. It threw in a mixture of personalities and perspectives. It threw in the dynamics of marriage, parenting, narcissism, low self-esteem, materialism, self-dependency, apathy, indifference, abuse, purpose, family, love, anger, fantasy, drugs, homosexuality, appearances, meeting people's expectations, pain, communication, conflict, and beauty. The thing that they all had in common was that they all needed to be loved. And because they couldn't receive love from others, they turned to other outlets of escape. They were all looking for their identity and something out of life. They all knew there was something more to live for, but they couldn't quite put their finger on it. Some characters would capture a glimpse of beauty and would just wonder what is the whole meaning to this thing we call life.

What was truly missing was a Christian perspective. They needed the love of God to show that there is more to life than chasing the American dream. The fruits of the Spirit, love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control can only come from the God. Romans 1 explains that God's creation testifies about Him, and that people can notice that there is something behind all this beauty in life. That there is a Divine Creator to this life we experience. That there is a God who compassionately cares for each one of us; That there is an abundant and full life through Christ and the fellowship of believers. That there is a love that goes beyond any of our descriptions. Are we living robotic, ordinary, boring, and routine lives? Or is there purpose in our life. Who or what do we serve and worship?

Have you ever taken a walk and seen the intense beauty of the sun, sky, wind and trees? God's creation is mind blowing, uncontainable, and can leave you breathless. After absorbing all of that, stop to ponder the unlimited, all powerful, relentless love of God. God uses natural revelation to draw us to special revelation, so that we can know that there is a God who loves us enough to die for us. To claim us, to be His, to save us from sin and death, and give us an eternal life with Him. It is impossible to encounter the full beauty and love of God and not be grateful, joyful, and to be full of awe. If you truly receive and trust Him as Lord over your life, you will be changed, you will love others, you will find your identity, purpose and meaning in life.

"This is how we know what love is: Jesus Christ laid down his life for us. And we ought to lay down our lives for our brothers and sisters." -1 John 3:16-17

For The Joy of Our Lord is Our Strength

2011-10-04T13:43:00.000-07:00

"The LORD is my strength and my shield; my heart trusts in him, and he helps me. My heart leaps for joy, and with my song I praise him." -Psalm 28:7

The Likeness of Jesus

2011-09-30T13:04:00.000-07:00

My TheologyI class assigned a prayer project to pray about our vocation and Phil 3:17. He asked, "What have you learned from observing those who embody the likeness of Jesus?"

     Praying about my vocation always seems to reinforce what I believe God has called me to. Becoming a pastor as a job in ministry is not the call. God has called me to preach and proclaim the Gospel, disciple His people in His Word, love Him with all that I am, and share His love with others. Now it’s a matter of being faithful to His call, and being, conscious of His daily will for me.
      I reflected on people who embodied the likeness of Jesus and observed those that follow Christ. Their life is explosive in love. I sense an overwhelming joy in their life, and it is absolutely contagious. They can’t help but smile and laugh all the time. They are extremely encouraging, especially when I’m discouraged. They do not hesitate to pray, they go directly to our Abba, Father. These people can have their down times, but are usually very solid. They inspire me to grow closer into the likeness of Christ, and to be in tune with the Holy Spirit. They take convictions seriously and are always willing to share what they have learned from God. These people encounter God, nay have fellowship with God everyday and what seems like every hour. These people don’t just worship God, they fall flat on their faces in submission. You can easily tell who reigns as their King. You can see how thankful they are for life and how much they cherish each moment of every blessing. These people see what most of us miss. They know how to stop and receive from God. I also observe that the people who imitate Christ have a huge heart for the lost and will put whatever they are doing aside to serve others.
      From observing these passionate followers of Jesus, I too inspire to live a fruitful life. I learned to glorify and magnify Him even in the smallest of things. I learned how important it is to receive His love and grace. I see that they are satisfied in God and hunger Him more than anything. I learned to be desperate for Him, to long and desire His Spirit. I learned to take delight in fellowship with Him and others. I learned to rejoice and praise God in all circumstances. I learned how crucial purity is, and how important it is to follow God’s will. I learned that every moment we have the opportunity to experience the intimate love of the Father. I learned to wait on God and be attentive to the many forms of His Word. I learned to apply the truth of scripture and to write it on my heart. These people have the fragrance and aroma of Christ. Their lives are their testimony. I pray that my life would also reflect the likeness of Christ.

“Join together in following my example, brothers and sisters, and just as you have us as a model, keep your eyes on those who live as we do.” –Phil. 3:17

¹⁴ But thanks be to God, who always leads us as captives in Christ’s triumphal procession and uses us to spread the aroma of the knowledge of him everywhere. ¹⁵ For we are to God the pleasing aroma of Christ among those who are being saved and those who are perishing. ¹⁶ To the one we are an aroma that brings death; to the other, an aroma that brings life. And who is equal to such a task? ¹⁷ Unlike so many, we do not peddle the word of God for profit. On the contrary, in Christ we speak before God with sincerity, as those sent from God. ¹ Are we beginning to commend ourselves again? Or do we need, like some people, letters of recommendation to you or from you? ² You yourselves are our letter, written on our hearts, known and read by everyone. ³ You show that you are a letter from Christ, the result of our ministry, written not with ink but with the Spirit of the living God, not on tablets of stone but on tablets of human hearts.” 2 Cor 2:14-3:3

"¹Therefore if there is any encouragement in Christ, if there is any consolation of love, if there is any fellowship of the Spirit, if any affection and compassion, ² make my joy complete by being of the same mind, maintaining the same love, united in spirit, intent on one purpose. ³ Do nothing from selfishness or empty conceit, but with humility of mind regard one another as more important than yourselves; ⁴ do not merely look out for your own personal interests, but also for the interests of others. ⁵ Have this attitude in yourselves which was also in Christ Jesus" -Phil 2:1-5

Extra Notes
God's Word =
1) Creation (God's word enacted)
2) Voice (God's word spoken)
3) Jesus (God's word embodied)
4) Scripture (God's word written)

"Sin only looks appetizing to the the starving soul." -Dallas Willard
If we have a feast for the main course that is full and satisfying, you won't crave desert.
Being satisfied in Christ protects our heart against sinful idols, and directs us to worship

Revelation

2011-09-25T04:28:00.000-07:00

I believe that everyday we are in dire need of a fresh newness of God's love. A revelation, that God's love caused Him to die for us. A love so deep and rich, that he would sacrifice Himself on the cross. So that the lost might be redeemed. Sinners made righteous. Orphans adopted as His own children. A King laying down his life for you. His love will not only change your life, but save your life.

We have become numb, ignorant. We miss the out pouring of His love. We forget, we become distracted. We lose sight of His mind, His will, and His heart. Yet His grace is endless. We've all rejected God, and yet His holiness overcomes all our sins. He freely accepts unconditionally, calling us to trust Him and live out our faith. What have i been worshiping lately? God? or myself and idols? How have i used my time, resources and life? Where has my heart been? What have been my desires and motives?

I had dinner with some college church folks. It was refreshing to have fellowship and the chance to get to know people better. 1 John 4:7-21 talks about God's love for us, and how we are to love others. God reminded me that the 1st and 2nd greatest commandments, are really one. Christ responds by giving 2 because they can't really be separated. To love God, one must love thy neighbor. To truly love thy neighbor, one must really love God.

After dinner, my roommate and I were bored, so we went to the gym. Playin ball and lifting weights was also refreshing, because i'm so outta shape. I was super pooped after 3v3 and didnt wanna workout after, but after we were done it felt great to get something accomplished. Sometimes it's rejuvenating to push yourself in a good discipline... Now if i could only stop eating so much fast food! mmm french fries, oreo cookie shakes, bacon.. mm!

Anyways after the gym, came home showered, then ran off to dennys at midnight cuz we were super hungry. And my roommate brought some things up that i completely forgot about. Crazy extreme things we need to do before work or family stuff gets in the way. Life not lived to the fullest is meaningless. We wanted to take advantage of some opportunities. So we began throwing out ideas and created a to-do list. Yes it would take time to plan all of this out, but talkin this over allowed me to rekindle the adventure in life.

1) 3weeks -month retreat of solitude somewhere peaceful

2) Bike around America (i was never sold on this one, lol)

3) Bible Lands (Our school offers a trip to Turkey, Greece, Rome Israel)

4) Become homeless for at least a month (i've been sold on this for a long time, but jus never found the right time or someone to be committed to it) We take so much for granted. Food, water, shelter, entertainment, technology, clothes, a blanket, shoes, air conditioner, cars, phones, etc. If you were homeless a quarter becomes valuable. We'd be able to direct our attention to God, because we would really have nothing else to rely on. We would become extremely thankful for what God has provided us with. I'm sure i would learn so much from being in extreme poverty. I jus hope i'd be able to survive.

5) Mission trip to Guatemala, or somewhere else

6) I go to Arizona to visit, he comes to Hawaii

7) Snowboarding!

Expository Preaching

2011-08-31T16:47:00.000-07:00

Some notes from my expository preaching class

-EP is an attitude or philosophy that is brought to preaching, not a methodology

-Do you subject the scriptures to your thought? or do you subject your thought to the Scriptures?

-Expository, is exposing what the original author intended to the original audience

-We are to preach the text and not our theology

-A text cannot mean what it never meant

-The job of the interpreter is to determine the single meaning intended by the author

-Preach the main point, meaning and purpose of the text, not secondary applications

-The points of your sermon must come directly from the text

- The purpose of an expository sermon must be the same as the biblical text

- A good communicator matches the right genre with the right meaning

-Adapt your communication style and mood with the genre of the text

- Balance the emphasis of the text, keep the tensions of the bible

- You are not the message, but the messenger

- Have confidence that you have the authority of Scripture and the power of the Holy Spirit

Possible solution to John 8:6

" But Jesus bent down and started to write on the ground with his finger."

I always wondered what he was doing with the dust/sand on the ground.

Our professor mentioned that it had to do with the Law. If someone were accused of a sin such as adultery, they would put dirt in water, and have the person drink it. This was called the bitterness test, because if the person got sick then it was a sign that they were guilty, and if they didn't show any signs of illness, they were not guilty.

Jesus may have been preparing for the bitterness test. Not for the lady, because she was already caught red handed. This was perhaps for the crowd of people. Jesus says, “Let any one of you who is without sin be the first to throw a stone at her.” These people began to leave one by one, because it is likely that they did not want to go through the test that they saw Jesus preparing. It's still speculation, but it's the best argument i heard.

Use metaphors to give your audience a mental visual of the concept or principle your explaining
Keep the main thing the main thing. The big picture and main point of the passage should be my main topic.
After exegesis and drawing meaning from the text, sit in meditation/closet, asking God what the significance is, and if i've applied it to myself. The conclusion should lead to a climax.

1) Why was this exegetical idea necessary for its original recipients?
- To whom did the biblical author deliver this message?
-What problem did it address?
- Why did they need to hear it? How urgent was it? Why? Visualize it in context
- Does the antecedent history of the recipients help explain why this instruction was necessary for these people at this time
- Are there any cultural factors that would have incubated or accelerated the need for this instruction? Why were the hearts of the original recipients so prone to wander in this direction? Why did God think that they specifically needed to be given this idea?
-What do you think the emotional response of the original recipients of this biblical truth would have ben? What was their visceral reaction whyn they first heart it?
- What did the original recipients of the message do with it? Did they heed this word or ignore it?
- How did this truth transform the recipients life?
Something is not true because it is in the Bible. It is in the Bible because it is true
- Is this the only time that this principle is mentioned in Scripture?
-What metaphors best capture the meaning of this passage

2) What is God revealing about Himself/his kingdom/ his church?
-What does this text reveal about God’s character?
-Why is this truth of the text theologically necessary? Why would God ask this of his people or do this to his people?

3)What is God saying to me in this text?
-Are my weaknesses their weaknesses?
-Are my temptations theirs?
-Has my life been warped as a result?
- What practices or habits exist in my life that contribute to this problem
-What is it about me that made me vulnerable to this sin
- How has my life and ministry suffered as a result
- How have others been affected by this
-How will the idea of this text force your life spiritually forward

4) What does God want to accomplish through this text
-in what ways are the people you lead similar to the original audience?
-Socio economically poor or affluent?
-Socially comfortable family units or widows?
Morally living surrounded by licentious? Affluence? Hedonisim? Secularism?
-Politically, is your country led by someone following God or a Pagan
-Spiritually

5) What could negate the progress I have just made through this text?
-What method is Satan likely to use to counterattack?
-Will he tell lies?
Will he use discouragement
Will he try and cause division?
Will he try and exploit some preexisting circumstance
What circumstances could make continued obedience to this truth difficult?

Conviction Leading to Repentance

2011-07-22T05:50:00.000-07:00

Just a blog about how I haven't been doing well spiritually this summer. But even through a dry season, God has been teaching me a lot about how I approach spiritual disciplines.

______________
EDIT AUGUST 29, 2011

I often struggle with meeting my own expectations and trying to do everything right. It's like there's a bar, a high bar for what a Good Christian should be like. If i'm doing bad spiritually, then i often just isolate myself, pretend i'm doing well and withdraw from running to God. It really isn't that hard front and pretend your doing good. I often just hide in the shame and guilt of my sin. But because we have been forgiven and declared righteous in Christ, we shouldn't toil in our unhealthy shame and guilt. As children who've committed a wrong, we should confess, repent and know that there is forgiveness from our heavenly Father. But sometimes Christianity just seems like it's only about the Do's and Don'ts. If Christianity were just that, it'd just be another religion based on performance, works, and not sinning too much. And religion based on ....
one's own human efforts is a self-righteousness that leads to pride, or in my case despair and condemnation. Because I do so poorly in spiritual disciplines, i feel like i just stink at being a Christian, or seminary student. It seems i judge or rate myself based on how well i'm doing spiritual disciplines, or lack of..

I've fallen into the lusts and idols of the world. I can be easily distracted. I fall for sins of omission and laziness. I can waste hours and days just on entertainment, media, food, sleep, indulgences, and that makes me idle to God. It makes me numb and distant to God's voice. It seems there's a battle raging within me, desperately wanting to be in commune with the Holy Spirit and at the foot of Jesus, and in the arms of Abba Father, and then there's chris wanting to have his own selfish way. I feel like i fell off the horse and im just stayin there, not getting back up.

However, our relationship with God is not based on sheer performance, effort, works and spiritual disciplines. God is after our heart. God is after my heart and not how much i can do right. And in order to achieve a pure desire and ability to do spiritual disciplines, we must center ourselves around the Gospel. The Gospel is the key to empowering Christians to live for Him. It takes faith in God's grace to have the power and passion to follow in His ways. I've tried to accomplish things all on my own, because that's how our world and culture teaches us to do things. I know i've said this a thousand times, but receiving God's love for us, gives us the strength and ability to love God back and others. Without absorbing, receiving and soaking in God's love, we become dry and empty. This is very common for those who just serve serve and serve in ministry. Sometimes the right thing to do is to be like Mary at the feet of Christ. Being with Christ, and making time for fellowship are absolutely necessary for one's spiritual growth and sanctification. In order to glorify, love, praise, worship and do good works, one must first come to the cross and encounter God's love n grace. Any spiritual disciplines that are not motivated or centered around the Gospel leads to a dry and empty religion. I know, because i've taken that route many times. It's about abiding in Him. A transformation that occurs by having a rich relationship with God. Apart from Him we can do nothing.

Not being in God's word, or in prayer is like not communicating or speaking with a loved one. If we truly say we love God, we should enjoy spending time with Him. It should be our deepest joy to just talk to God and be with Him. So don't beat yourself up like i do, if it seems you arn't doing anything right and doing everything wrong. God's grace is unconditional, free of charge. We arn't judged by how well we perform, how long we prayed, how many church services we sat in, or how many works we did this week. We are judged by the blood of the Lamb. If we are covered by the blood of Christ, we are forgiven, and given a new heart. Once we are born again in Christ, our faith should lead us to love and good deeds automatically. If you love chicken katsu, you won't be forced to eat it. If you love someone, then you'll desire to spend time with them and be with them.

this is kinda how my mind works.. It starts by seeing our total depravity, and inability to do anything good on our own, and the desperate and dire need for a Savior and God who helps us love and growth. lol who cares about sentence structure, this is a blog n not a school paper

Conviction> Repentance of Sins and Idols> Abiding & Waiting on God > Receiving His Love & Grace> Desire to Know Him > Receiving the Power of His Holy Spirit > Joyful Obedience in Doing Spiritual Disciplines > Sanctification > Praising God, Loving Others and Good Fruit

____________
JULY 22, 2011
Im pretty sure i felt discouraged, frustrated with myself and jus sucky at life, lol
The edit in Aug 28, is how long it took me to really come to my senses about everything ive been goin through. If ur not doing good spiritually, dont jus dwell on how bad ur doing. Repent and find fellowship with God and other believers. Dont withdraw and hide like i did.

So i finished two intense summer classes for school. At school i've been gaining a lot of knowledge. However, i feel like i haven't been prioritizing the practice of spiritual disciplines or any ministry/counseling skills. There are so many requirements and high academic standards that i feel like im there for a degree and good grades, rather than the pursuit of knowing God deeper. Everything is about reading books, regurgitating it back on quizzes and test. One of my professors mentioned that a seminary student who isn't participating in an active ministry is like a stagnant pond. Just storing up exegetical techniques, greek vocabulary, and all the theological jargon and not being able to use it, can be quite frustrating. Perhaps i don't feel like im being used. I am learning a lot from my classes. But sometimes, it's so much that i can't contain and remember it all. Too much content, information overload! maybe i try to take too many classes in a semester.

Another one of my professors mentioned that being faithful to our classwork and studies is being faithful to God. However, school and the work load is so demanding that sanctification almost seems religious and exhausting. I also don't feel right with seeing seminary as a substitute for my entire spiritual walk or church. But sometimes i'll try to rationalize, or make rational-lies that it is a substitute or enough.

I debated even sharing this blog. I rather my blogs be uplifting and encouraging to others. I rather have a blog full of praise. And in a sense God is still praised for convicting me of a selfish and sinful routine summer. If you had 24 hours, a week, a month with nothing really scheduled, how would you spend it. Would you seize each day and make the most of it? Or would you waste time being unproductive, lazy and idle? If i'm stagnant and not growing, i feel like i'm just falling back into a lazy default.

Now that it's summer. It's embarrassing to say that i have a lot of time and yet i still don't devote much to God. Every moment can be an opportunity to worship God and commune with Him. This blog is an ugly confession at how bad i'm doing lately. But it's true. I need to manage my time and self better.

Christianity is doing things because of what He already did. We should enjoy spending time with God and others, it should be our highest joy. We should desire to do things for God, because of His love. Religion is the opposite. Religion is doing things for God, so that God will then approve of us. What confuses me, is that some blessings are conditioned and others and unconditioned. We are blessed everyday by God's grace, and yet there are other blessings that require us to take action first. For instance, if I do a good deed, such as feeding the homeless, then God would bless me with a deeper compassion for those in need. So in many cases, blessings are conditioned by good works. I don't know if im making any sense. I just want to make sure my intent and motive for doing things isn't just for a selfish spiritual blessing, it should be done unconditionally out of love regardless of reward.

I've spent my last two weeks very selfishly. I've just been indulging in food and sleep. It'd be nice to hangout with people more often, but most of them work. That leaves me at home without a car. Lately, it just seems like everything i do is for myself. I dont even take care of myself well. The things i do for myself arn't even healthy or good. I just sit in front of a computer or watch a movie. I wanted to make a difference in specific people's lives. Especially my family. Sometimes i just don't have the boldness to speak out. I just feel like i haven't done anything right. I feel greatly disappointed in myself. I feel like a lazy slob, a sluggard, and a selfish child. I have trouble with moderation. Without moderation it becomes an addiction. I'm addicted to food, comfort, media entertainment, and fun. These things suck so much of my time, that these distractions have actually become sin for me. Over doing lazy mode doesn't honor God. I have no problem stuffing my face with snacks, sleeping at strange hours, watching 8 seasons of 24, watching korean dramas, playing video games, and staying home all day. And yet I can't even pray or read my bible for 3 minutes. It's sad. I've become numb to God. I haven't been responding, it's the truth. I also haven't been attending church, and i just feel yucky inside. I feel like something needs to change. I need to change. I need to come up with specific ways i can get my walk back in order, so i can reach out to others.

I think i realize the high bar a pastor is expected to meet. I see the high bar a Christian is to meet. I don't see myself hitting 2% of those expectations. I feel like living for God takes a whole lot of work, time, energy and sacrifice. God gave everything, and yet i cant seem to give Him back anything. I'm absolutely selfish and sinful without God's help. Sometimes it just seems like our Christianity is too much about doing. I need to practice more with just being with God, then the doing should come natural. But right now, being and abiding with God has become a challenge. I struggle so much in my daily walk, i feel very inadequate to lead others. I know God wants to use me, but i seem to keep resisting. I think it comes down to a pride issue. It seems i am hungry for comfort and control. I like things easy, and i like things my way. I pray that God would humble me.

Perhaps just spending more time with God and other believes is the solution. Reflecting and receiving God's love for me definitely seems like a good start. Worship music, and scripture usually get the wheels going. Hopefully i can get my act together for the rest of the summer. And no matter how low i get, God still loves unconditionally. I need to remind myself that God accepts me just as I am and doesn't condemn me. His incredible love and grace should motivate us to live for His glory and not our own.

Worlds Apart - Mostar Diving Club

2011-07-15T05:22:00.000-07:00

Some day you will find me
I haven't gone too far
I miss the way we were back then
How we laughed
I can feel you in my heart

There's a world in your eyes
I can see it getting brighter
All the hours that we turned into days
We were young seemed like life would go on last forever
All I had was you by my side

Some day you will answer
Remember how we were
When all our hopes and dreams
Floated in the air I feel it in my heart

I can feel you in my heart
That's the way that it was in the past you remember
When we ran through the wind and the rain
We were young seemed like life would go on last forever
Now everything has changed

Full Body Exercises

2011-06-23T03:57:00.000-07:00

my new workout routine

12 Sets, 100 Full Body/ Core Exercises, 1200+ Reps
5 Minute Stretch pups=pushups

Warm up
200 Jump Rope, Jumping Jacks
40 Forward Rolls
40 Back Rolls
40 Fingers to Shoulders
40 High Knees

SET 1
10 Jump Squats
10 Lunge Jumps
20 Slow Leg Lifts
20 Bicycle Crunches w/ Kicks
20 Push Throughs
20 Outside Pushes
20 Regular Push Ups
10 L-R Jumps
10 Ski Jumps

SET 2
20 High Jumps
8 Rolling Jumps
20 1 Leg Hip Extensions
20 Elbow to Knee Crunches
40 Mountain Climbers
20 Outside Mountain Climbers
10 Prone Thrusters
8 Pups w/ Ab Twist
10 1 Arm Cross Pups

SET 3
20 Box Jumps
20 Slow Box Knee Ups
40 Box Step Jumps
15 In and Outs
15 Bicycle Kicks, Hands Up
15 Reverse Bicycle Kicks
10 Crunchy Frogs
10 Uneven Pups

SET 4
10 Jump 180 Degrees Squats
8 Burpees w/Squats, Pups, Jumps
10 Side Squats w/ Weight
16 Side Ab Twist Holds
20 Ab Twist Burner w/ Weight
8 Full Body Get Up
10 Spider Pups
10 Combat Pups

SET 5
10 Body Weight Squats
40 Mummy Kicks or High Knees
10 Running Hurdle Jumps
10 Fingers to Ground, Knee Up and Jump
10 Alternating Feet Sit Ups
26 Alphabet Leg Lifts
10 Pups Stance, Side Crunches
5 Push Up Jumps

SET 6
10 Cross Knee Planks
10 Squat w/ Knee Raises
20 High Knees w/ Ab Twist
10 Wide Extended Legs Sit Ups
14 Wide Extended Legs, Up and Over
20 Hand to Foot
10 Leg Climbers
10 Spider Crawl Pups
10 Crab Side Walk

SET 7
10 Down to Middle Squats
8 Ground Crawl w/Jump Backs
10 Lunge, Curls, Shoulder Press
10 Angled 60-90 Degree Leg Raises
15 Scissor Kicks
10 Banana Ab Rolls
10 Cross Arm Pups Stretch
10 Incline Pups

SET 8
8 Rolling Jumps
10 Backward Crab Stretch
10 Crab Crosses
10 Crab Kicks
40 Side Crunches
10 Diamond Leg Pushes
10 Heels to Heaven
10 Drop Elbows
10 Pup Jacks

SET 9
10 Lunge Kicks, or w/Weight
10 Jumping Leg Kicks Slow and Fast
10 Squats w/Weight Presses
10 Combo Leg Up Rolls
10 Leg Closers
8 Out, Out, Down, Down, In, In, Up, Up
8 Pup Stance, Knees to Elbows

SET 10
10 Down and Pull Back w/Weight
10 Toilet Squats w/ Uppercut
10 Squat w/Side Weight Lifts
10 Weights Between Legs
10 Elbow Hold, Knee Lifts
10 Dead Lift, Clean, Press
20 Back Lifts and Back Pulls
30 Small Ab Flexes

SET 11

20 High Jumps20 Low Jump Squats30 Twisting Pistons20 Elbow to Knee or Side Crunches 10 Leg Lifts10 Push Throughs40 Mountain Climbers10 Uneven Pups10 1 Arm Cross Elbow Pups1 Min Happy Feet, squat, high knees, pupsExtra Credit Equipment Exercises10 Pull Ups20 Bench Up, Mid, Down10 45 Plate Pull Ups10 Triceps10 Ab Twist w/WeightMedicine Ball Exercises 10 Side Ball Toss,Feet Up10 Ball or Weight Toss Up10 Med Ball Crunches10 Med Ball Sit Ups10 Med Ball CrawlsCool Down StretchWeights, Cycle, Run, Bball, Swim

I'd probably hafta demonstrate most of these, since i made most of these exercise titles up, lol. You can do less exercises and higher reps, you don't want to injure yourself and over do it

Diet = Chicken, salmon, steak, turkey, small portion rice, salads, fruits, vegetables, cereal, boiled eggs, protein shakes, water, nuts, berries, yogurt, no fast food, no candy, no ice cream, no soda. 5-6 small meals/snacks a day. Once i go back to hawaii for the summer, ill probably fall off the horse with these disciplines

Surrender

2011-06-18T23:43:00.000-07:00

When we sin against someone, there are consequences to pay for our wrong doing. When we sin against the most high God we deserve death, wrath, and eternal separation from him. For sinning against a holy and infinite God, we owe God an infinite debt for our transgressions. As finite creations we are unable to reconcile and satisfy our eternal debt. It would take an eternal being, God himself, to pardon our sins. When we come to terms with the reality of our sins and fallen depravity, we recognize our desperate need for a Savior.

The good news is that God saves sinners. God's unconditional love and unmerited grace was manifested in the person of Jesus Christ... (read more)

The King and Son of God Himself, became a lamb to be slain for our iniquities. His sacrifice and atonement covers those who believe in Him. It is through His precious blood that we are saved. He not only forgives all our past, present, and future sin, but imputes His righteousness to us. When we stand before the Judge we are justified and declared right with Him because of our faith in Jesus Christ. Without faith in Him, there is no salvation. Surrender, believe, trust in His grace, repent of sin, and become right with God.

"My dear children, I write this to you so that you will not sin. But if anybody does sin, we have an advocate with the Father—Jesus Christ, the Righteous One. He is the atoning sacrifice for our sins, and not only for ours but also for the sins of the whole world." - 1 John 2:1-2

"If you declare with your mouth, “Jesus is Lord,” and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved. For it is with your heart that you believe and are justified, and it is with your mouth that you profess your faith and are saved." -Romans 10:9-10

"But whatever were gains to me I now consider loss for the sake of Christ. What is more, I consider everything a loss because of the surpassing worth of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord, for whose sake I have lost all things. I consider them garbage, that I may gain Christ and be found in him, not having a righteousness of my own that comes from the law, but that which is through faith inChrist—the righteousness that comes from God on the basis of faith. I want to know Christ—yes, to know the power of his resurrection and participation in his sufferings, becoming like him in his death, and so, somehow, attaining to the resurrection from the dead." -Phil. 3:7-11

Have mercy on me, O God,
according to your unfailing love;
according to your great compassion
blot out my transgressions.
Wash away all my iniquity
and cleanse me from my sin.

For I know my transgressions,
and my sin is always before me.
Against you, you only, have I sinned
and done what is evil in your sight;
so you are right in your verdict
and justified when you judge.
Surely I was sinful at birth,
sinful from the time my mother conceived me.
Yet you desired faithfulness even in the womb;
you taught me wisdom in that secret place.

Cleanse me with hyssop, and I will be clean;
wash me, and I will be whiter than snow.
Let me hear joy and gladness;
let the bones you have crushed rejoice.
Hide your face from my sins
and blot out all my iniquity.

Create in me a pure heart, O God,
and renew a steadfast spirit within me.
Do not cast me from your presence
or take your Holy Spirit from me.
Restore to me the joy of your salvation
and grant me a willing spirit, to sustain me.

Then I will teach transgressors your ways,
so that sinners will turn back to you.
Deliver me from the guilt of bloodshed, O God,
you who are God my Savior,
and my tongue will sing of your righteousness.
Open my lips, Lord,
and my mouth will declare your praise.
You do not delight in sacrifice, or I would bring it;
you do not take pleasure in burnt offerings.
My sacrifice, O God, is a broken spirit;
a broken and contrite heart
you, God, will not despise.

May it please you to prosper Zion,
to build up the walls of Jerusalem.
Then you will delight in the sacrifices of the righteous,
in burnt offerings offered whole;
then bulls will be offered on your altar" -Psalm 51

Being with God and God's Family

2011-05-30T19:20:00.000-07:00

We all go through problems. We face difficult circumstances and tough situations. It's not hard to become overwhelmed by the stresses of life. To cope with our anxieties we often turn to media, family members, friends, addictions, or we can hold it to ourselves in hopes that we can derive at an appropriate solution for our problem. When we overly focus on our problems, sins, fears and failures, we feel discouraged, defeated, hopeless, exhausted, frustrated, confused, empty, depressed and lonely.

\/ read move \/

Instead of keeping our eyes on all our problems, we should fix our eyes on Christ. Trying to fix our problems on our own is definitely not the right solution. We may think we're in control, but then we come to realize that everything is in God's hands. In faith we are to trust God with our past, present and future. We are to trust in His sovereignty. Immanuel or Emmanuel both mean God with us. Being with Him involves relying on Him. We are to retreat to Him as our hiding place and fortress. In Him we find rest, restoration, peace and love. Finding a community of believers who also offer acceptance, warmth and understanding is also very important. Depending on God and turning to those who offer compassion is the first step to healing. We are not meant to carry these heavy burdens on our own. God may not cure our deep scars immediately, but He will remedy the pains of our heart. He may not restore broken bonds or our losses, but will comfort us with His love.

Holding on to all our problems, not being able to let go of our failures, not forgiving ourselves and trying to accomplish everything on our own is not trusting in His grace. If we just stop, pause, and wait upon Him and invite Him into our situation, then He surrounds, engulfs, empowers and consumes us with His love. Walking and living with God and His people will lead to the fruits of the Spirit. We are not meant to tackle all these obstacles on our own, because when we do we get burnt out. Trust on God for every step, depend on your brothers and sisters in Christ.

I watched a few sermons on singleness. Sometimes being single can be lonely and quite depressing. The solution isn't to just get married. Yes it would problem help, but the matter is something deeper. We are to connect with the body of believers in fellowship. In the Bible, it wasn't turning to spouses but to your siblings for help. Brothers and sisters meant a lot more then, then it does today. We are to share our lives with each other and treat God's people perhaps even closer than our own family. We are to minister, serve and give ourselves to another. If we aren't willing to welcome a nonbeliever into God's family, we have no right to be preaching the gospel. It's never just been a relationship between God and an individual. A relationship with God includes a new family of the church body. Do we truly see our brothers and sisters in Christ as family? Do we open ourselves to the ministry of others?

Spring 2011

2011-05-20T06:17:00.000-07:00

What I learned this semester at Talbot

This blog is mainly for myself. It helps me to record and reflect, because I don't want to forget
Btw I took 6 classes for a total of 9 credits!

I haven't been sleeping too well for the past month. These last few weeks have been pretty stressful. I only have one more week which is finals week.

\/ HEY READ MORE! \/

Spiritual Formation
This class focused on vocation and calling. I was excited because they were going to cover spiritual disciplines too, but we never got to it. We read a book called Courage and Calling. I learned that there are different levels of calling. The first foundation is a call to Christ and salvation. Built on that is a general call for Christians to live according to God's Word. This is where it gets a little tricky. On this second level there are two callings that are built on top. One is for our personal vocation and life purpose. This is not limited to a career. Then we also have God's daily calling for us. We had to do a spiritual retreat and were asked to pray about our past, present and future. I think i have a pretty good discernment of God's will for myself, but I struggle with having enough courage and boldness to meet his callings.
Career wise, im also wondering if I'm to pursue a PhD in a graduate psychology program. it's at least 5 years, plus internships. It'd be great for counseling, but the amount of time, money and energy is quite intimidating. Perhaps a social worker or therapy degree might be more realistic.

Spiritual Direction
I met with a spiritual counselor 5 times this semester. It was good to just verbalize internal struggles, fears or anxieties. The focus of this class was to ponder and observe how God is working in my live.

Pastoral Care and Counseling
This class was interesting. We learned the importance of compassion and listening. We are to listen to 3 ears. Listen to what the person is saying, listen to ourselves internally, and listen to what the Holy Spirit might be saying. In counseling, we learned that the goal is not to give them solutions to their problems, but rather direct them to God. Listening skills include reflecting their content, validating their difficulties, look for feeling words of equal intensity to describe their situation and to ask for confirmation. This is actually much harder than it sounds, because our initial habit is to just offer our advice. We are then to ask them more God leading questions about their situation. We also had to run a transforming community group, this is like a small group but focused on hearing about each others lives. In my group of guys there was actually a lot of healing from just having a group of people who would listen. Being vulnerable and honest with others is something we don't always do too often. I liked the emphasis on the importance of church and a christian community.

Theology IV, Eschatology and Ecclesiology
This is the study of last things and the church. This class got pretty intense. We studied different views of the events described in revelation. It's pretty confusing because all of it is futuristic and prophecy is hard to interpret. We read a book on the 3 views of dispensationalism. Basically, time eras of how God issued his plan. We covered Premillennialism, Amillennialism, and Postmillennialism. Then we covered Ecclesiology, and the nature of the church body. I spent the last month working on a 17 page paper. I must have spent at least 25 hours working on it and 100 hours stressing out about it. It was tough because we need at least 10 sources.

Research Methods
I took a class that taught us just how to write in Turabian format and how to cite footnotes/bibliography. Who knew writing a paper was so complicated!

Field Education
I was supposed to be more involved in ministry and to write up my experience about it. I was also supposed to make a 2 month discipleship program. I didn't do it, but I the professor allowed me to just write about my experience of trying to lead in a youth ministry.

Exegesis in the Gospels
This wednesday i pumped out a 12 page paper in 15 hours. I stayed up to 8am! it was tough because i had 16 sources and a lot to discuss. I usually really suffer with my greek classes, but this class focused more on hermeneutics. I enjoyed learning all sorts of techniques for reading and interpreting the gospels. Literary includes the plot, characters, the author's intent, the book themes, Old Testament references, the structure of the narrative, tracing common themes within surrounding passages, and trying to read the text in its larger context. Start with the big context and work down to the smaller context.

world view
cultural values, social codes
historical experience
genre of text
occasion for writing
whole document
paragraph
verse
clause
word

Grammatical things include word studies and using more of the greek. Syntactical diagrams of breaking down clauses helps, but this more helpful in the epistles. Cultural backgrounds can be huge because there are a lot of Jewish customs and traditions that we don't really know about. It's important to read the text then and there and then move to here and now. Historical backgrounds include dates, events, rulers, etc.

Then you gather your theology from these and try to condense the main point into a specific sentence of interpretation. Then from there you can make applications.

How to prepare a sermon

Translate from its language
read passage in other versions
if in the gospels read its parallels
Syntactical diagram, breaking down clauses and flow of argument
read paragraph by paragraph writing a one sentence summary for each
connect surrounding themes, read the entire book a lot, and its surrounding chapters
the author's intent and book themes, word studies
historical, cultural, commentaries

I also learned some homiletics, how to preach God's Word effectively.

Target your audience and their needs
create a teaching outline objective,
Introduce the main point

These 5 points should be the goals of the sermon
Focus on
1) Right Relationship
2) Right Teaching orthodoxy Know
3) Right Practice   orthopraxy Will
4) Right Affection orthopathy Emotions
5) Right Will, desires

It is a matter of the mind, the will, and the heart; it reaches to every one of our constituent parts

Tell them what you are gonna tell them intro
Tell them what your telling them            body
Tell them what you told them                 conclusion

In the body state your point
explain point
prove / illustrate point
restate point
transition to next point

Basically repeat your main point
five or ten minutes of listenable preaching is better than forty five minutes of boring preaching

yup that's what i've learned in a nutshell, in the summer I'll be taking Theo III Soteriology Christology
In the Fall i'll be taking Exegesis in the Epistles, Romans, Theo I and Expository Preaching

Prince of Egypt - "When You Believe"

2011-04-18T03:04:00.000-07:00

Shirat Hayam "Song of the Sea" Exodus 15:1-18
(Hebrew children singing at 2:30)

אָשִׁירָה לַיהוָה כִּי-גָאֹה גָּאָה (verse 1)
[ashira la'adonay ki ga'o ga'a] x2
"I will sing unto the Lord, for he has triumphed gloriously"

מִי-כָמֹכָה בָּאֵלִם יְהוָה, מִי כָּמֹכָה נֶאְדָּר בַּקֹּדֶשׁ (verse 11)
[mi chamocha ba'elim adonay, mi kamocha ne'edar bakodesh]
"Who is like you, O Lord, among the gods? Who is like you majestic in holiness?"

נָחִיתָ בְחַסְדְּךָ, עַם-זוּ גָּאָלְתָּ (verse 13)
[nachita vechasdecha am zu ga'alta] x2
"You in your mercy have led forth the people which you have redeemed"

אָשִׁירָה ,אָשִׁירָה ,אָשִׁירָה
[ashira, ashira, ashira!]
[I will sing, I will sing, I will sing!]

A God Like No Other - 100th blog!

2011-04-14T00:27:00.000-07:00

God is good. He is infinitely good. His perfect plans and purposes are for our good and for His glory. He is one of a kind, a God like no other. He is supreme above all. He is the sovereign Lord. He holds all things together. He pours out His Spirit within His people. He calls us friend, beloved, His chosen people. As fatherless orphans, He adopts us and gives us the right to become His children. We can be forgiven through the blood of the Lamb. The King Himself bore all the wrath of our sins for those who believe. He covers our sin and imputes His righteousness on us. He is a Redeemer, a just Judge, and a Sovereign God. He deserves the highest praise and all glory, for He is good. READ MORE >>

I’ve kind of been in a Spiritual rut these past few months. I felt that it was hard to come to God in prayer and found it very difficult to spend time in His Word. I got extremely stressed with schoolwork and didn’t know how to handle it all. I felt distant. I turned to the idols of my dark sins. I looked for a way to fill the void. But nothing can satisfy that deep need for a relationship with God.
One of my outs is media. Mindless video games, internet surfing, television and movies can often be an escape from life. It’s perfectly fine in moderation, but can become an idol if we are constantly checking our Facebook page 10 times a day. Instead of exploring the world and learning the deep things of God, we settle for starring at a screen for hours. Even though it’s easy to waste our time, God calls us to be wise and meaningful with our time.

On Monday night I slept 4-5 hours and had to wake up early to take an exam. And even though I felt like a zombie all day I didn’t take a nap. At night when it came to sleep I couldn’t sleep. I stayed up all night. I found myself reading scripture at 5am. I felt empowered, resolved and inspired to give my all to God. I needed change. I desired to live fully for Him. We can become better and stronger by the power of His Spirit. And yes, no one is perfect, but we can share moments with God.

At every moment, and every second of the day, we have the opportunity to be with God. We have the opportunity to worship and glorify Him in whatever we’re doing. We can come directly to Him by the Holy Spirit. We don’t need to stand in line, take a number like the DMV or have some priest intercede for us. He is available to us at every moment, because at every moment He gives each and every one of us His undivided, full attention. How? Well, He is God. My point is that God is always after our heart. He pursues relentlessly after us with His intense love. And it is His relational love that transforms us.

Sometimes I specifically want to gain some deeper revelation, to hear His comforting voice, or to feel some sort of feeling of His love. And even after waiting, praying, and seeking in still silence, He may not give me all the answers that I seek. He might instead speak to me in some other way. But regardless of if we got anything out of our quiet time, I learned that it was time well spent because in faith we were spending quality time with Him. And that is what He is after. Instead of doing, just simply be, be in His presence.

Anyways, back to my story. I stayed up all night and felt energized, alert and awake. So I decided to go to the gym at 7am. This is odd for me because I can usually sleep till the afternoon if I don’t have class. So I arrived at the gym and feel a burst of energy. I then went to the cycling class at 24 which is really great. I got super tired, but all the older women kept going, so I did my best to endure an hour of pain. But during that time, God spoke to me. It just felt great to feel awake, and productive so early in the morning. I got so much accomplished that morning. Later on I went home and slept at 11am to 3.

I guess this blog is a call to step out of your comfortable routine. Try something different. Try new foods. Go somewhere different. Make a new friend. Wake up earlier. Exercise, read a new book or call up an old buddy. God not only calls us to salvation, but to grow in our sanctification. Don’t just stop at justification, we are called to be the salt and the light of the world. As Christians, we need to take deep root for us to grow and bear fruit. We must grow in our relationship with God, relationship with the church body, and our relationship with the lost. We need the right nutrition to grow and to be purposeful for His kingdom. And everyday we can experience the fresh newness of His love. Starting the day with God and keeping Him close throughout the day will change our lives. Abide and remain in Him. God calls us to better ourselves, not just in our daily routines, but in the pursuit of Him. Are we growing in character, righteousness and integrity? Or do we fall into our idle, lazy self and take shortcuts. Challenge yourself. As clay, God stretches, shapes and forms us according to His will. How will you respond to God's will and plan for you?

I was reading a book about how people can turn to addictions and can develop negative patterns of behavior because of deeper embedded emotions and needs. People can easily find themselves in rejection, abandonment, isolation, loneliness, depression, addiction, self-hatred, and other anxieties. People will begin to follow an addictive cycle of self comfort and self protection. Addictions start in preoccupation, visualizing a fantasy or false reality of a need. They then begin their ritualization or response, which stirs us how they prepare for their addiction, then they act out compulsively on impulse, and finally they’ll find themselves in despair. Coming out of the cycle requires community, counseling, and healing. We all have problems, but how will we deal with them? We need a double knowledge, the knowledge of our self and the knowledge of God.

It’s so easy to get caught up with our problems, selfish desires, and worldly distractions. It’s extremely easy to cover in our shame, and hide in the guilt of our sins. Adam and Eve covered and hid from God when they realized that they sinned. But the good news is that we have forgiveness through God’s grace, we don’t need to condemn ourselves because Christ bore our sins. We don’t need to cover in shame because Christ as freely accepted us. God sees all of who we are, and yet unconditionally loves us. So don’t hide and cover in your sins, don’t try to make yourself better by works, or by trying to atone for them on your own, go directly to Christ with them, because that is why He came! In faith receive His grace.

Paul says he makes his body his slave. He uses himself to be a vessel and doesn't allow the external to really affect his internal contentment. Regardless of his circumstances or persecution, he pursues after the prize, which is Christ, and trains himself in holiness and obedience. He understood how God's Spirit allowed Him to be self controlled, disciplined and content. In Phil 4:12 he mentions how in any and every situation he has learned the secret to being content. Whether in plenty or in want, hungry or well fed, he knows that He can do all things, through Christ who strengthens him. In the same way, Christ needs to be our strength. We need to find rest in Him. He is our shield, fortress, refuge and hiding place. We are so easily moved by our daily problems, rather we must reaffirm our love and remember that He is our source of strength, true joy and peace. With our little control and understanding, it is pivotal that we place our trust in Him. Stand on Him who is the solid Rock, all other ground is sinking sand.

"Therefore, my beloved brethren, be steadfast, immovable, always abounding in the work of the Lord, knowing that your toil is not in vain in the Lord." -1 Cor 15:58

“May God himself, the God of peace, sanctify you through and through. May your whole spirit, soul and body be kept blameless at the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ.” -1 Thes 5:23

“Watch your life and doctrine closely. Persevere in them, because if you do, you will save both yourself and your hearers.” -1 Timothy 4:16

"For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith—and this is not from yourselves, it is the gift of God." -Eph 2:8

“For I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do all this through him who gives me strength.” –Phil 4:12-13

“Let anyone who is thirsty come to me and drink. Whoever believes in me, as Scripture has said, rivers of living water will flow from within them.” –John 7:37-38

“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.” –Matt 11:28-30

"I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me. The life I now live in the body, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me. I do not set aside the grace of God, for if righteousness could be gained through the law, Christ died for nothing!” -Gal 2:20-21

“This is how God showed his love among us: He sent his one and only Son into the world that we might live through him. This is love: not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins.” -1 John 4:9-10

“The most important one,” answered Jesus, “is this: ‘Hear, O Israel: The Lord our God, the Lord is one.Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength.’The second is this: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’There is no commandment greater than these.” -Mark 12:29-31

"Rejoice always;pray without ceasing; in everything give thanks; for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus" -1 Thes 5:16-18

"My soul, wait in silence for God only,
For my hope is from Him.
He only is my rock and my salvation,
My stronghold; I shall not be shaken.
On God my salvation and my glory rest;
The rock of my strength, my refuge is in God.
Trust in Him at all times, O people;
Pour out your heart before Him;
God is a refuge for us." -Psalm 62:5-8

“Answer me when I call to you,
my righteous God.
Give me relief from my distress;
have mercy on me and hear my prayer.
How long will you people turn my glory into shame?
How long will you love delusions and seek false gods?
Know that the LORD has set apart his faithful servant for himself;
the LORD hears when I call to him.
Tremble anddo not sin;
when you are on your beds,
search your hearts and be silent.
Offer the sacrifices of the righteous
and trust in the LORD.
Many, LORD, are asking, “Who will bring us prosperity?”
Let the light of your face shine on us.
Fill my heart with joy
when their grain and new wine abound.
In peace I will lie down and sleep,
for you alone, LORD,
make me dwell in safety.” –Psalm 4

“May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.” –Romans 15:13

Romans 3:21-26

2011-03-18T03:41:00.000-07:00

21 But now apart from the law the righteousness of God has been made known, to which the Law and the Prophets testify. 22 This righteousness is given through faith in[h] Jesus Christ to all who believe. There is no difference between Jew and Gentile, 23 for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God, 24 and all are justified freely by his grace through the redemption that came by Christ Jesus. 25 God presented Christ as a sacrifice of atonement,[i] through the shedding of his blood—to be received by faith. He did this to demonstrate his righteousness, because in his forbearance he had left the sins committed beforehand unpunished— 26 he did it to demonstrate his righteousness at the present time, so as to be just and the one who justifies those who have faith in Jesus.

Being with God

2011-03-11T16:36:00.000-08:00

For school we had to spend 30 minutes listening to God. Later on I'll have to do a 24 hour retreat outside of home. That's hard to do when your usually pressed on time. But it's refreshing to hear from God especially when I've been absent for so long. Anyway, here's a short meditation..

It's great when God speaks to you and comforts you when it's spontaneous and not expected. It's great to feel the warmth of His love, and His peace that passes all understanding. But lately I've been having a hard time trying to listen to God because many times I do expect to hear some sort of message from God. Many times I don't pick up what God wants me to hear. I've struggled with spiritual disciplines because I usually want an immediate fix for my needs, or at least some assurance that He is right there with me. As of late, I have been impatient and sort of anxious. Listening to God for 30 minutes was challenging. And I don't think spending time with God should be. Spending time with God should be something we love and desire to do. To consciously and intentionally direct my heart, mind and thoughts upon God can be difficult. I found myself to be easy distracted and would think of other things that I wanted to do.

I finally lied down on the carpet next to my 2 cats. They were just resting. Sometimes when I try to hug them they just run away or bite and scratch me. But I realized that God just wants to spend time with me, and I am often too stubborn to receive from Him. I grow impatient. But this time, my cat just laid his head on my arm. In the same way, God delights in us when we simply find rest in Him. I think God was trying to tell me how much He values being in communion with me. It's not about doing, but being. God calls us to simply be with Him.

I was then listening to a pastor give a message on the radio. I didn't really like the sermon because it felt he was giving the congregation a guilt trip for not tithing. I don't think it's right for leaders to pressure people, especially when it becomes all about the money. Plus I believe tithing should be what each purposes in his or her heart to give. So I was a little upset about how the pastor was giving his sermon.

Then i started to pray for Japan and the tsunami that recently happened. My friends and family are in Hawaii, and I was happy to hear that nothing serious affected Hawaii. I then thought about how devastating the damage in Japan was and how all the families, schools and homes were affected. I then got upset because I remember reading a friend on twitter complain about how it was raining, or something about her nails. Sometimes we get so bugged down by little things, and aren't grateful for all the blessings. I know I take so many things for granted. Christians are being persecuted, people have major illnesses, and I have a hard time doing devotions or homework.

So as I was taking out the trash, I saw a little girl playing in the street. I was reminded of God's beauty in creation. This girl gave me a big "Hello!" with a smile on her face. As I walked back I was in awe of God's creation. I was amazed at how far the blue sky stretched, how the sun was shining, and the trees were waving. Sometimes it's great to see the world as a child again, and stopping to see how vivid and colorful life can be. So the two things I got from spending time with God was to just be with Him, waiting still in faith, and also to appreciate life and the beauty of His creation.

Evidence for Christianity- JP Moreland

2011-03-05T18:50:00.000-08:00

Evidence for Christianity - JP Moreland

Our Daily Bread

2011-01-21T13:09:00.000-08:00

A hotel in Singapore introduced an express buffet, eat all you can in 30 minutes and pay just half the price! After that experience, one diner reported: "I lost my decorum, stuffing my mouth with yet more food. I lost my civility... and I lost my appetite for the rest of the day, so severe was my heartburn."

Sometimes I think in our devotional reading we treat God's Word like an express buffet. We wolf it down as fast as we can and wonder why we haven't learned very much. Like physical food, spiritual food needs chewing! For those who have been Christians for a long time, we may have a tendency to speed-read through the passages we've read many times before. But in doing so, we miss what God is meaning to show us. One sure sign of this is when we learn nothing new from that passage.

David's desire was right when he wrote in Psalm 119:15 "I will meditate on Your precepts, and contemplate Your ways." That's the way to treat God's Word, to take time to mull it over.

Let's not come to the Bible as if we were going to an express buffet. Only meditating on God's Word will we get the most value for our spiritual well-being. - C.P Hia

Spending time in meditation
Hiding Scripture in our heart,
Works in us a transformation
So from sin we can depart -Sper

"Oh God, You are my God;
early will I seek you;
My soul thirsts for You;
my flesh longs for You
in a dry and thirsty land
where there is no water." -Psalm 63:1

What If We Treated Our Bibles Like Our Cell Phones?

2011-01-20T14:32:00.000-08:00

If we treated our bibles like our cell phones we would have a stronger relationship with God. We would know God's heart and know Him more intimately. We would constantly check God's Word every time He had something to text us. We would be updated with divine messages meant for us to hear throughout our day.
We would spend time with Him as much as we spend time playing silly iphone apps. We would worship Him with praise for every song that we played. We would be reminded of His love with each phone call. We would carry our bibles everywhere and never leave the house without it. We would always be equipped to turn to it in emergencies. We would be in prayer as often as we check our emails. Instead of watching ridiculous youtube videos, we would find joy in His truth. Every night we would set our bibles next to us, so we could wake up hearing His voice. I believe God's Word has the power to penetrate our hearts and restore us if we would just meditate on His Word. When the gospel of Jesus Christ takes root in our lives, we become Christ-like to others. We would share God's love to more people than we have on our contacts list. If we cherished our bibles as much as we cling to our cell phones we would grow tremendously in our relationship with God. Perhaps there's a voice message waiting for you today.

Withdrawn

2010-12-31T00:05:00.000-08:00

It's been obvious to me that I have been idle and withdrawn from living for God. The last 6 months of school have been so crazy that i basically pushed God to the side. Every moment of free time was used to recover from the stress of school. Instead of turning to God to find rest in Him, i turned to idols. I filled my mind with media, flooding it with movies, television and other mindless games. I felt like a sluggard, doing nothing meaningful. I resorted to doing easy things and avoided anything that required work. I felt useless to God. I wasnt purposeful. I found myself making excuses and putting blame on distractions, when it was really the condition of my heart.

If we love God as we say we do, then shouldn't it be easy to make time for Him. Shouldn't it be easy to worship God? Perhaps i hardened my heart by not turning to its greatest joy. Instead of seeking fellowship with God and other believers, I sought after temporal lusts and desires to fill a void of intimacy even though they don't truly satisfy. I not only disconnected myself from the Vine, but withdrew relationally to other brothers who are always there to encourage me. I wasn't accountable to others, myself, or God. I allowed my idle state to rule. I backed away from doing any sort of work for God. Even though we aren't saved by works or performance, our lives should clearly display His transforming Spirit. Rather, I sat in my rebellion, refusing to spend time with the One i confess to love.

I guess subconsciously, I still have a habit of condemning myself instead of receiving God's grace. When i suck at being a Christian, when i haven't touched my bible in weeks, or been intentional with prayer, it's a lot easier to be critical on yourself than have grace. You know that you've been distant from God, and that increases your guilt, discouragement, and shame. I'm embarrassed that i haven't been able to step up to the plate. I missed many opportunities to add a word of encouragement, to pray for someone, to be a leader, or to call a friend. I withdrew from God and withdrew from others. I haven't confessed my sins to my accountability partners. Ive skipped church and missed times of fellowship. Ive been shy when it comes to encouraging others. Ive excluded myself when it comes to meeting with other believers. Instead of coming back to repentance, I just hid and threw on a mask. It's not hard to pretend that you're doing alright. Only true friends may know your faking. But God sees right past our defenses. He sees us for what we really are, and yet graciously accepts us with unconditional love. God is always welcoming us back into fellowship.

"This is the message we have heard from him and declare to you: God is light; in him there is no darkness at all. If we claim to have fellowship with him and yet walk in the darkness, we lie and do not live out the truth. But if we walk in the light, as he is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus, his Son, purifies us from all sin. -1 John 1:5-7

Now that it's winter break, i have all this free time. There is no excuse for running from God. And yet idols, addictions, and other indulgences have filled my heart. My eyes have not been on Christ. Instead of loving God, my conflicted desires chose comfort, fun and pleasure over spiritual blessings. I may have spent an hour here and there pondering the gospel and being thankful for God's love, but overall i have not spent my time wisely. As a representative and ambassador of God, i have been utterly useless. I haven't glorified Him with spending my time with friends, or wasting the day at home watching movies. Now more than ever, i see the importance of receiving and sitting in God's love. Bad stuff happens when relational beings don't seek after relationship with God. We settle for counterfeit, and live for cheap things that have no value. I believe the solution is waiting on God. Sitting and seeking His face. Desperately desiring God's Spirit to empower you to help you live, love and worship. We can't do anything on our own strength. And even though i know this, i have a difficult time putting all of this into practice. I must learn to receive His forgiveness for my sins, to trust in His grace, and to allow His love fix this condition of my heart. When Adam and Eve were asked where they were after they sinned, they hid from God. They ran to cover themselves. They were embarrassed, because they knew they were guilty. This sin disconnected them from perfect fellowship with God. So when we do sin, we shouldn't hide from God. We shouldn't withdraw or condemn ourselves. We are to confess and bring our sins to the light, having faith that we have an Advocate on our behalf. A branch apart from the Vine is useless and becomes withdrawn, but a branch that remains in Him, and abides in the Vine is fruitful and useful for God's kingdom and glory.

"My dear children, I write this to you so that you will not sin. But if anybody does sin, we have an advocate with the Father—Jesus Christ, the Righteous One. He is the atoning sacrifice for our sins, and not only for ours but also for the sins of the whole world." -1 John 2:1-2

1/10/11
I think i still struggle with the role of obedience. Most people think God will love them more if they are more obedient. That is not true, otherwise it would be based on works. However, obedience is of utmost importance. When you read the Old Testament, it seems like there is more of an emphasis on covenant obedience. But this obedience comes only through faith. Faith without works is dead. Abiding in Him, trusting in Him, and having a strong relationship with Him should be lived out in joyful obedience. It should be our desire. But lately it hasn't been my greatest desire. Lately i've been selfish, lazy and stubborn. I know right from wrong, and yet i do nothing, and dwell on how bad i'm doing as a Christian. Being in seminary almost seems like your expected to be on top of your spiritual life and growth. But it has become very frustrating for me to constantly fall into sin. It seems i've had much more defeats than victories when it comes to battling sin. I guess i still condemn myself, it's hard not to. This goes completely against the gospel of His grace. The bottom line is that i'm not receiving and trusting in His grace. This is vital for any obedience to occur. Although we are saved by grace, i still see a huge benefit in our human efforts and spiritual disciplines. It seems the more we're in His word, in prayer, and have fellowship with others, the more I grow spiritually, and the more i feel closer to God. I have greater intimacy with God when i do these spiritual disciplines. But then, it seems like my entire spiritual growth seems dependent on my efforts, and not the Holy Spirit. I've been wrestling with my conflicted desires, and how we are to desire His will. Again, this probably goes back to being still, and pondering His great love, His salvation, sovereignty, and who He is.

I once heard a great sermon about taking your faith seriously. That most Christians, are either not Christians, don't live like Christians, or are very young in their spiritual walk. Sometimes we'll have a spiritual high, get into a worship mood, or feel closer to God than usual. But daily and continual faith in Christ is something that most of us struggle with. We can talk about faith, have theological models of faith, but at least for me, it's hard to live by faith. I used to say I was a Christian, and not many people would know. I'm not sure anyone knew. I felt God was shoved in my back pocket and I would only turn to Him in my more desperate needs. Then i began to take my faith seriously. Daily devotions, being immersed in His Word, having great conversations with other believers, being in ministry, being discipled, and being rooted in prayer, helped me to live by faith. But again, it seems I've put God back into my little pocket, and have put myself back on the throne of my life. I have been extremely unproductive, and haven't taken much initiative when it comes to living faith out. It's easy to pretend, it's easy to say you're a believer, but how often do we stand for God's righteousness in our lives?

Today my mom accidentally said "I love you when you help me." This was when she wanted me to do yard work, which i really don't enjoy doing. I said "Well then your love is conditional." She then changed it to "I enjoy it when you help me." Parents desire their children to be obedient. Obedience is one of the best ways in expressing our love for the other. When my mom says, "Cook food, do your laundry, or come help me." More times than not, i just sit in front of my computer, or watch a movie on tv. I am so lazy, and it seems i put my own needs first. In the same way, I've been living the same when it comes to obeying God. I sleep in and miss church. I put devotions aside for another day. I don't pray often, or that long. In one way or another, all of us are disobedient in many areas of our lives. The question then is, how can we live obedient and faithful lives? How are we to grow in this area? If we love God, we should obey His commands. If we love God, it should be our desire. But what happens when it's not? One thing for sure is that God lavishes us with His grace, even in our times of disobedience. I need to stop hesitating. I need to take initiative, I pray for boldness, I need to stop being withdrawn from God, we need to desire Him and His will. We need to live as Christians, by following Christ, and obeying His Word.

2011 Resolutions

2010-12-27T06:25:00.000-08:00

This is about the time of the year when people make new year's resolutions. I've already been convicted about which goals, disciplines, and resolves I am to prioritize for this coming year. These goals have been the same goals for a few years now. Ever since seminary, it seems my determination, commitment, focus, and consistency of these goals have dwindled. I pray that now more than ever, God would empower me with the strength of His Holy Spirit to continue to grow in these areas. I know when you make goals, it's best to be specific and have realistic time frames of measurement. I tend to be successful for a short while, then tend to give up completely on keeping them daily.

Many Christian leaders like to refer to the 1700's pastor, Jonathan Edwards. He was greatly known for keeping and holding himself to his 70 resolves. At a young age he was determined to live a life that glorified God. The amazing thing is that he continued to pursue and accomplish his resolves daily. He wasn't always successful, however, his devotion and faith in God proved to produce much growth in his life.

I desire the same for my life. I want to be committed to running the race. I want to be relentless in my pursuit for righteousness. I want to become obsessed with sanctification and growing in a godly character of integrity. When im not moving forward in life, taking a step closer to Him, i feel as if i am falling backwards. Being stagnate and idle in faith, paralyzes a believer and disconnects him or her from true fellowship with God and other believers. It's a constant battle to fight evil and temptations everyday. Im guessing that's why we need to equip ourselves with the armor of the God and remain in strong fellowship. We need to keep our eyes on Christ. We need to preach to ourselves the gospel daily. It is an absolute necessity. Most days we leave our houses in the morning without tuning our heart to His. We completely miss what God has planned for us. We have become so numb and ignorant of how God intends to work in our life. We completely miss opportunities to love, serve and encourage another. We are given countless scenarios of a choice to worship God, or to cave in to our sinful and selfish desires. But no matter how bad we do at our spiritual walk, God's grace is fresh every new day. The question is how will you live today? What is our heart set upon? Who will we live for?

Raw obedience doesn't last long because there is no spark behind it. No motivation, no inspiration, no passion or energy to accomplish God's will. The key is to find joyful obedience. We honestly don't find enough pleasure in spiritual disciplines. We have the opportunity to meet with Him at any second. God is never to busy for us. He gives us His entire attention. He never puts us on hold, and you never hafta travel anywhere or stand in a long line. God is available to us at any moment. The question is will we turn and go to Him? Will we sit at His feet as Mary did. Will we wait upon the Lord in silence and stillness. Will we call out to Him in prayer? Will we seek His truth in His Word? Will we meditate on His goodness and sing songs of praise? Will we find delight and pleasure in Him? Will we allow Him to satisfy the deepest thirst of our souls? Will we offer our lives as a living sacrifice and give ourselves to Him? Will we place our trust and faith in Him this day? Will we receive His powerful love? This is the beginning to joyful obedience. Without receiving from Him, we have no power to worship Him. A branch cannot bear fruit unless it abides in the vine.

This is what happens when i try to make a short blog, i get side tracked and go off topic. I wanted to talk about New Year's Resolutions and how we can increase our relationship with God. It takes a lot of soul care and digging into the roots of our sin. It takes faith and perseverance to live consistently with daily devotion. Honestly, the past few months of striving towards my goals have sucked. I havn't been achieving much progress in accomplishing my daily goals. But i am still learning not to condemn myself, but rather to meet God in my inadequacies and failures. I desire to do better and live brighter. I want to become the person God desires of me.

Anyways here's some of my 2011 resolutions

- Read daily devotions, (Bible and other Christian books)
- Become more bold in faith
- Become more gospel centered, and reminding myself the power of God's salvation
- Be able to extend myself more to the church and to meet with believers consistently
- pray more, pray with others, and pray for others,
- Take more walks with God
- start writing in my journal again
- focus on confession and repentance
- Focus being intentional with sharing the gospel, especially with certain individuals
- be able to find rest in God, especially when im stressed with school
- be able to communicate with God and others better
- be able to resist certain addictions and bad habits
- focus more on spiritual disciplines, and to find joy in them
- Be able to receive God's grace
- be more relational and others minded
- keep my eyes, mind, and heart pure
- take more initiative, especially when it comes to leading
- To be more thankful for the smallest of blessings
- to be wise with my time and resources, and manage myself better
- to spend more time in fellowship

- get a better sleep schedule, (its 5am now)
- eat healthier
- exercise more
- play more bball and swim more
- play guitar
- stop biting my nails
- watch less media
- save money
- get a job
- cook more
- be more productive and less lazy
- spend less time on the computer
- read more
- no procrastinating on homework, and to study more

Reflection of 2010

2010-12-16T20:07:00.000-08:00

Moving up to California was a big transition.
This year had many trials.
I went through a time of depression
but was strengthen by fellow peers, classmates, counselors, and the church body
I faced a tough living environment, which lead to daily frustration
But was also able to forgive and approach the situation in love
I became defeated, discouraged and extremely stressed out at times
But was lifted and encouraged by God
My first year at Talbot just finished today, and I realized that God has been growing and strengthening me through these trials

Here's a few things i learned this year

The importance of community and fellowship with the church
the beauty and the power of the gospel, and letting it take root in us daily
the absolute necessity of turning to God in prayer, and praying for others
How abiding in the vine, is abiding in Christ, in His words, and in His love
The importance of immersing ourselves in the Bible, meditating on scripture,
And reading big chunks at a time to get the big picture of the context
How literary, grammatical, historical and cultural backgrounds breathe life into the text
The tricky approach to academics, while keeping you're spiritual walk your priority
The sanctification gap, and how God's grace accepts us as we are
Living a life of faith is followed with obedience, worship and actions
Seeing and loving people the way God does
Synchronizing our heart to His
How we should be good stewards of our lives, time and resources
Importance of being real with yourself, others and God
How God is our strength, refuge, hiding place, fortress, and peace
How we are to conform our desires to God's desires
How important it is to stand for righteousness and live in purity
How sin is an illegitimate way of trying to satisfy a legitimate need
Waiting upon God, seeking His purposes, instead of rushing with our own plans,
Finding rest and joy in God, even through trials and suffering
God's almighty sovereignty, providence and supremacy over all of creation
The infinite goodness and intense love the Father lavishes on us everyday
How God used people in both the OT and NT, watching His plan unfold
How God was faithful to His covenants, How he used prophets, leaders, and kings
How He led the nation of Israel through their captivity and delivered them from their enemies
How theology and school can even become an idol at times
escatalogy, epistemology, soteriology, pneumatology, exegesis, hermeneutics, imputation
How God grows us within our relationships and families
How we are to treasure Christ above all else
and a bunch of other stuff that i cant think of right now
k bye!

Church as a Family

2010-12-11T02:53:00.000-08:00

One thing ive been learning is seeing the Church as a family. The best terms Jesus gave us for seeing other believers in the church were brothers, sisters, and mothers. Usually our priorities are God first, the family, the church, and the world. However, the service of God is never separated from serving God's people.

My teacher, Joesph Hellerman, who wrote "The Church was a Family" argues that we are to put a greater emphasis on treating the body of the church as our family. 57 times, Paul says "our God" and only once writes "my God." We normally see our sanctification and spiritual growth as a very personal experience. Even at our conversion of justification we have seen it as a very personal and individual relationship with God. However, when a believer steps into faith, he or she in a sense has become part of a new family. We find a relationship with God, but don't have the view of giving our lives to the church and the gospel.

This should change the way we witness to someone. People are hesitant to join a belief, because they want no commitment to a group. When we tell someone the good news, we often leave out that they should get connected to the family of the church. We honestly don't do a good job with welcoming new believers into the body of the church. I believe most Christians are greatly struggling with their spiritual walk because they arn't connected with other believers.

We have been raised extremely individualistic. Our needs are always put first before any group our community. Even within our families, we often put our own needs first. In America we seek how a church can meet our own personal needs. We seek the church to fill all our spiritual needs, rather than how we can contribute and give to others. We look to what we can get out of it, rather than how we can build the body.

In Acts, people would willingly surrender their own needs for the good of the church. In our work places, and educational institutions we see it as a means of gaining something for ourselves. A paycheck, a degree. We don't really think what's best for the collective group. As Christians, it's not just your personal relationship with God, we are to come together as a church and worship as a single unit.

We are to be focused on meeting other people's needs. Often people are turned off by the church because they don't feel welcomed or cared about. When I was looking for a church, I expected people to greet me. If people didn't then I usually left and went looking for another. We run to easily. We don't let relationships take root. Once things get uneasy we're so quick to flee. If a church doesn't satisfy our every individual need, we seek another. If there's conflict, guess it's off to somewhere else. As Christians, how much do we honestly invest into the church? Do we see church as just a Sunday service? Do we connect with others in a small group? Do we pray with and for others? Do we work conflicts out? How do we treat the church?

I am inspired by the Korean church I am currently attending. When I got sick and went to the emergency room, a bunch of people from the church called me and wanted to check to see how I was doing. I was astonished that people actually cared.

Are we really dying to ourselves? Do we lay our lives down for others? Are we others minded? Do we intentionally express love to our brothers and sisters? Faith without works is dead. Do we go out of our way to grow together? Loving others is loving God. We expect others to be there for us, yet how often are we there for them?

I am convicted because I don't usually extend myself outwards. If things are inconvenient for me I have a hard time giving and offering help. I keep my life closed off and reserved. I don't usually let people know what I think or how I feel. I internalize everything, instead of sharing and blessing others. We get so caught up with ourselves and all our current trials, we pay no attention to how others are. Being encouraged, starts with being an encouragement. In conclusion, love is selfless and our spiritual growth is not meant to be done alone.

Unconditional Love - Paul Washer

2010-11-21T02:18:00.001-08:00

2010-11-06T04:41:00.001-07:00

2010-10-25T00:39:00.001-07:00

‎"The ultimate goal of life is that God be displayed as glorious because of all that he is and all that he has made and done, especially the grace he has shown in the work of Christ. The way we glorify him is by knowing him truly, by treasuring him above all things, and by living in a way that shows he is our supreme treasure." -John Piper

Should Christians Tithe?

2010-10-05T03:07:00.000-07:00

Jesus Christ

2010-09-13T23:12:00.000-07:00

"Salvation is found in no one else, for there is no other name under heaven given to men by which we must be saved."-Acts 4:12

"My dear children, I write this to you so that you will not sin. But if anybody does sin, we have one who speaks to the Father in our defense—Jesus Christ, the Righteous One. He is the atoning sacrifice for our sins, and not only for ours but also for the sins of the whole world." 1 John 2:1-2

"In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God. He was with God in the beginning...
The Word became flesh and made his dwelling among us. We have seen his glory, the glory of the One and Only, who came from the Father, full of grace and truth." 1 John 1:1-2, 14

"For the wages of sin is death, but the gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord." -Romans 6:23

"That if you confess with your mouth, "Jesus is Lord," and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved. For it is with your heart that you believe and are justified, and it is with your mouth that you confess and are saved. As the Scripture says, "Anyone who trusts in him will never be put to shame."For there is no difference between Jew and Gentile—the same Lord is Lord of all and richly blesses all who call on him, for, "Everyone who calls on the name of the Lord will be saved." -Romans 10:9-13

"As for you, you were dead in your transgressions and sins, in which you used to live when you followed the ways of this world and of the ruler of the kingdom of the air, the spirit who is now at work in those who are disobedient. All of us also lived among them at one time, gratifying the cravings of our sinful nature and following its desires and thoughts. Like the rest, we were by nature objects of wrath. But because of his great love for us, God, who is rich in mercy, made us alive with Christ even when we were dead in transgressions—it is by grace you have been saved. And God raised us up with Christ and seated us with him in the heavenly realms in Christ Jesus, in order that in the coming ages he might show the incomparable riches of his grace, expressed in his kindness to us in Christ Jesus. For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith—and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God— not by works, so that no one can boast. For we are God's workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do." -Ephesians 2:1-10

"For this reason I kneel before the Father, from whom his whole family in heaven and on earth derives its name. I pray that out of his glorious riches he may strengthen you with power through his Spirit in your inner being, so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith. And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the saints, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge—that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God.Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen." -Eph 3:14-21

O God, you are my God,
earnestly I seek you;
my soul thirsts for you,
my body longs for you,
in a dry and weary land
where there is no water.

I have seen you in the sanctuary
and beheld your power and your glory.

Because your love is better than life,
my lips will glorify you.

I will praise you as long as I live,
and in your name I will lift up my hands.

My soul will be satisfied as with the richest of foods;
with singing lips my mouth will praise you.

On my bed I remember you;
I think of you through the watches of the night.

Because you are my help,
I sing in the shadow of your wings.

My soul clings to you;
your right hand upholds me." -Psalms 63:1-8

The Mathematical Odds of Jesus Fulfilling Prophecy

"The following probabilities are taken from Peter Stoner in Science Speaks (Moody Press, 1963) to show that coincidence is ruled out by the science of probability. Stoner says that by using the modern science of probability in reference to eight prophecies, ‘we find that the chance that any man might have lived down to the present time and fulfilled all eight prophecies is 1 in 10¹⁷." That would be 1 in 100,000,000,000,000,000. In order to help us comprehend this staggering probability, Stoner illustrates it by supposing that "we take 10¹⁷ silver dollars and lay them on the face of Texas. They will cover all of the state two feet deep. Now mark one of these silver dollars and stir the whole mass thoroughly, all over the state. Blindfold a man and tell him that he can travel as far as he wishes, but he must pick up one silver dollar and say that this is the right one. What chance would he have of getting the right one? Just the same chance that the prophets would have had of writing these eight prophecies and having them all come true in any one man."

Stoner considers 48 prophecies and says, "We find the chance that any one man fulfilled all 48 prophecies to be 1 in 10¹⁵⁷, or 1 in 10,00,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000, 000,000,000,000,000, 000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000, 000, 000,000,000,000,000,000,000, 000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000 000,000,000." 1

The estimated number of electrons in the universe is around 10⁷⁹. It should be quite evident that Jesus did not fulfill the prophecies by accident. He was who He said He was: the only way (John 14:6).

2010-09-10T03:49:00.000-07:00

"Listen, O heavens, and I will speak;
hear, O earth, the words of my mouth.

Let my teaching fall like rain
and my words descend like dew,
like showers on new grass,
like abundant rain on tender plants.

I will proclaim the name of the LORD.
Oh, praise the greatness of our God!

He is the Rock, his works are perfect,
and all his ways are just.
A faithful God who does no wrong,
upright and just is he." -Deuteronomy 32:1-4

"Find rest, O my soul, in God alone;
my hope comes from him.

He alone is my rock and my salvation;
he is my fortress, I will not be shaken.

My salvation and my honor depend on God;
he is my mighty rock, my refuge.

Trust in him at all times, O people;
pour out your hearts to him,
for God is our refuge." -Psalm 62: 5-8

Random Thoughts

2010-09-03T14:46:00.001-07:00

Finding myself in Starbucks attempting to get homework done..

I pulled a "forgot to bring my earphones to starbucks"

Ran into a blogging mood

This semester I'm taking Old Testament Survey, Spiritual Formation, Exegesis, and Intro to Field Education.

Bummed cuz I hadta drop Patristic and Medieval Theology, cuz Exegesis is way too hard.

Ive been very stressed out with trying to form a comfortable school schedule. I musta switched my schedule 3-4 times, and I'm still not very satisfied with it.

I sense that this semester will be overwhelming, largely due to greek class.. i put 4 times more energy into that one class than for the others and still have a hard time

I find myself impatient and fidgety at times. i realize that my hands are normally playin with something

I had jack in a box today for the first time in 10 months

My roommate made me ice cream on top of a warm chocolate cookie, best desert ever

I would like to become more consistent with my disciplines and goals

Although I am trying to conserve money, I am spending money that I dont have

I have been somewhat absent from exercising and eating healthy, but tryin to get back into it

I am realizing how deceitful my heart is when I try to rob glory from God

I am realizing that my vocabulary, spelling and reading skills are that of a 7th grader.

I would like to be more intentional with relationships. I am seeing a deeper need to evangelize, disciple, listen, and love.

I would like to work on becoming a stronger leader by being a sacrificial servant

it's hot outside! 100 degree weather is no fun

I want to swim and play more basketball

I like shooting zombie games

I want to trade my cat in for a dog

In humanity, truth and love are seldom combined

Obedience to God should be a product of Faith and not Legalism

Sin is an inadequate way of trying to satisfy an adequate need

Conform your desires to God's desires, synchronize your heart to His values and His principles

I am diligently trying to grow spiritually mature, but finding myself greatly distracted by the idol of academics, knowledge, and theology

I want to change my perspective of enjoying the blessing of education.

I need to slip away in secret prayer more often, and grow in my hunger for God's Word

God's grace is sufficient

The purpose of Christian doctrine is not merely to make us more knowledgeable but to make us more mature as followers of Jesus Christ, to make us more like him

Although I have a productive mentality, I find myself worrying about things i need to do, rather than actually accomplishing them

So now I'm blogging instead of studying

I really have to pee, but dont want a risk a bathroom run, in fear of someone jacking my precious mac laptop

I want to go see scott pilgrim again

I really like veggie chips, so addicting!

This week i have a 5 day weekend! i gotta make the most of it!

You never, never, never, never, outgrow the need to preach to yourself the gospel

I always look forward to my 24 hr fitness cycle class

I am enjoying the great fellowship at church, home, and school

I need to get back to doing homework.

"But if from there you seek the Lord your God, you will find him if you look for him with all your heart and with all your soul." -Deut 4:29

"Hear, O Israel: The Lord our God, the Lord is one. Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength. These commandments that I give you today are to be upon your hearts. Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. Tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads. Write them on the doorframes of your houses and on your gates." -Deut 6:4-9

"Know therefore that the Lord your God is God; he is the faithful God, keeping his covenant of love to a thousand generations of those who love him and keep his commands." Deut 7:9

"He humbled you, causing you to hunger and then feeding you with manna, which neither you nor your fathers had known, to teach you that man does not live on bread alone but on every word that comes from the mouth of the LORD." -Deut 8:3

"Dear children, let us not love with words or tongue but with actions and in truth." James 3:18

"Do not merely listen to the word, and so deceive yourselves. Do what it says. Anyone who listens to the word but does not do what it says is like a man who looks at this face in a mirror and after looking at himself, goes away and immediately forgets what he looks like." James 1:22-24

"In the same way, faith by itself, if it is not accompanied by action, is dead....You see that his faith and his actions were working together, and his faith was made complete by what he did." James 2:17, 22

"We love because he first loved us." -1 John 4:19

Summer '10

2010-08-21T22:49:00.000-07:00

My summer is coming to an end. It felt way too short because of my summer greek classes. I passed both by a few percent! I've never been so happy to pass with a C! The thought of having to retake it next semester was enough motivation for me. It was by far the most challenging and brutal class ive taken thus far. I wanted to cry, pull my hair out, light things on fire, and go to the extremes. Sometimes i'd pray for Christ to return just so i wouldnt have to suffer through an exam. lol.. In the positive light, i feel less confused about greek, and a little more confident in interpreting scripture. Reading the Bible in it's original text is quite fascinating because you'll pick things up you don't see in english, but for the most part i'll let the greek theologian scholars handle it.

Well... after i finished summer school it was off to Hawaii! I missed home dearly. It was great to see all my favorite restaurants, drink clean tap water, hit the beach, visit all my church friends, eat breakfast with old buddies, go to greg's house and get so excited for video games, go to the rec center and cruise like old times. It definitely brought back memories, even if i was only away for 7-8 months. It was especially refreshing to see my family and to see all my cuzins grow up. Theres a 4 month, 2yr old and 13 year old. They seriously do grow up too fast! I only got to spend 3 weeks in hawaii, and for 2 weeks i got sick with a cold, so that was a summer bummer. Vacation went by way too quickly and before i knew it, i'm back in cali, and off to school again.

Now that i'm backed in cali, i realized how much i missed my roommates, church, and my cat snowball! I find myself to be much more disciplined and independent in the mainland. When i was in Hawaii, my mom would do most of the cooking, chores, and garden work. I think that makes me lazy because that lets me get away with doing absolutely nothing, except focusing on having fun. But being sick for 2 weeks really made me miserable and sluggish. I ate tons of junk food and custard pie, i didnt wkout cuz i had no energy, i would sleep at weird hours, and become unproductive. I think it's easy to compromise your values and disciplines when life is easy and comfortable. But as we grow older, it seems we are forced to mature and take care of responsibilities. But sometimes it's great just being a kid.. i don't think i'll ever stop watching cartoons. lol

One think i struggled with this summer was truly desiring God, and how to desire him when i had a conflict of desires. I felt like i made a lot of excuses for myself and allowed myself to get distracted. I went in circles with trying to figure out how i could increase my faith and desire in Him. I felt like I couldnt hear Him, but it turns out I just wasnt listening. In order to desire Him, i normally need to be motivated by His love, in order for me to effectively embrace His love i normally have to spend quality time in silence and in prayer, which requires more desire.

So I didn't know how I would discipline myself, but it turns out that I really just needed to come back to repentance and worship. The more i condemned myself, and hid in my dark sins, the more i withdrew. Although I know God forgives all sin, I couldnt forgive myself of my failures. Once i was able to surrender and let go, trusting in His forgiveness I was able to move on. When we have a hard time trusting Him, we first need to turn to Him, and it is then His Spirit and love will motivate us to continue walking in faith. Our relationship is not based on performance, feelings, or our own efforts, but rather it is just abiding in Him and trusting His sovereign grace. I guess i just needed to preach the gospel to myself and remind myself of His good salvation and redemption.

Living in cali has made me more disciplined and organized. I try to focus on my goals daily. Some actually got accomplished, some i was inconsistent, and others i just sucked at. Here's some of my resolved goals and disciplines

cleaning my room
managing my time wisely
reading
going to the gym to get some cardio,
doing my devotions in God's Word
spending time in prayer/worship
eating healthy
improving my sleep habits
limiting computer/tv,
flossing and brushing my teeth more
decreasing the massive amount of money i spend
learn guitar

so my disciplines and goals vary in priorities but they've challenged me to grow stronger and more responsible as an individual. One goal that i've been working on is building on relationships. I realize how valuable it is to truly love others and enjoy spending time with them. I often take for granted how blessed i am to have such a great family and friends. Playing games, laughing, joking, having fun and catching up on old times really does make life more enjoyable. I guess it took me to move to the mainland to realize how lucky and fortunate i am. Once you're on your own, you realized how easy and simple life was. Lately i've been seeing how treasured relationships are, and how valuable it is to keep everyone close in touch. And the more we focus on absorbing God's love for us, the more we can extend that love out towards others. Well overall it's been a great summer, and now it's time for another semester. ah blogging really is good for the soul. till next time.

His Bride

2010-08-01T19:32:00.000-07:00

So i jus finished my intensive Greek 1 and 2 at Talbot. I passed both by decimal points! Praise God i dont hafta take it again! lol.. So happy!

Ive been back home in Hawai'i nei for 3 days now! Ill be here till Aug 21st. It feels so good to see friends and family. I really missed a lot of them. I still have to see a bunch of church friends. Some Jehovah Witnesses came by Saturday, so we're planning on meeting again to discuss the person/deity of Jesus, so that'll be fun. It's great kicking back and jus playing a bunch of video games and eating local food. I also missed the weather (even nice rain) and i forgot how good hawaii's tap water is. Although i also forgot how expensive everything is ova here.

My first semester and summer at Talbot was surprising more difficult than i expected. I am glad that I have learned a lot of theology and practical ministry, but at the same time i feel that it can also become an idol for me. I really need to focus on my quiet devotional time. I'm also growing in faith by preaching the gospel to myself daily and jus resting in God's grace. It really feels great to have an advocate in our defense that draws us into intimate fellowship with God. I do feel a little more stable in my walk with God. I am still battling temptations of pride, lust, and laziness, but I do feel that God is pruning, sharping, refining me and preparing me for his work.

I am lately very astonished by the body and bride of Christ, His church. We are a new creation, adopted sons and daughters, and holy saints. I am jus amazed at the unity and great worship that i have witnesses in the church. A korean pastor once said, "The church is not a hall of fame or museum for saints, but rather a hospital for sinners." And i would agree that the church really does offer healing and restoration. I am learning to trust in the power of prayer for others, and not jus by words but in actions. Faith without works is dead, and whoever does not love his fellow brother does not know God. God's love and spirit of truth is becoming more and more manifested in the church. I am so overwhelmed and thankful for such a loving community. I now understand the great joy Paul felt when he spoke of seeing and worshiping with the body.

I really do see God's spirit at work and drawing his people to Him. I have been experiencing the bond between brothers and sisters, and great discipleship that is taking place. I noticed that the closer we draw to Christ, the more God uses us through His spirit, and the easier it becomes to love on others. I believe the key to healthy spiritual growth is really just abiding in Him and remaining steadfast in His almighty and sovereign grace. Friends, i pray that we would continue to press forward, confessing our sins to another, and being the church that God wills. Let the light of Christ shine in our lives, do not cover under a bushel, for love conquers over a multitude of sins. Pray for each other, offer our lives as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to Him. For we are created to grow in His likeness. Find rest, peace, and joy in His glorious Name, and praise Him who is mighty to save.

Father, i pray that we would die to ourselves, and that you would increase in our lives. We surrender our pride, we cry out for Spirit. I pray for consistency and immediate obedience. I pray that his church would be the salt and the light of this world, and that people of all nations and races would come to know Jesus as Lord and Savior. Father we thank you for your amazing love and grace, help us to trust and desire you when we dont. Heal our scars, forgive our sinful thoughts and actions. Change our hearts, conform us to your Son, and glorify your Church. Thank you for never letting go of us, You are so good! We praise you in Jesus Name! Amen!

HEALTH

2010-07-12T21:48:00.000-07:00

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R3cDktWJl2Y

"Rather, train yourself to be godly. For physical training is of some value, but godliness has value for all things, holding promise for both the present life and the life to come." -1 Timothy 4:7b-8

I feel like a million bucks right now. I had such an awesome day. Eating right and exercising has changed my life. I've somehow become a health freak, lol.

Physical, Spiritual, Emotional, and Mental Health all interrelate for your well being. Hopefully this blog will inspire you to start taking your health and nutrition disciplines more seriously. Try to incorporate some of these health tips into your lifestyle.

PHYSICAL
I signed up for a cycling class that 24 hour fitness offers. It's free for members and super fun. I probably burnt about 1000 calories in an hour. You do some stretches, take quick breaks, and do the workout as a whole. Our instructor really pushed us to our limits and made us work really hard. I like how he makes us visualize as if we're actually biking. His encouragement was the best part. "He would be like, k single file, we're making a turn up the hill, NOW! break away! push! faster! don't give up on me! dig!! feel the burn! don't get comfortable! You don't come here, if you're not gonna push! now baby! crank it up a notch! give me all your energy, all you got! breathe! steady.. 3, 2, 1, now baby! lets go! power! kick it up! common!" It was such a blast, and the music really gets you in the zone. And then after you feel super refreshed and lighter.

Make a goal to do something physically active everyday. At least go for a 20-30 minute walk. Biking, swimming, plyometrics, synogistics, (dont do yoga, that's hinduism idol worship) stretches, aerobics, jump rope (10mins jump rope = 30min jogging), any martial arts, dance classes, hiking, any sports that require running, taking the stairs, and try to hit the gym at least 3 times a week. Swimming, cycling, treadmills, circuit training, basketball, jump rope and weight training are my favorites. Watch youtube videos to learn nutrition facts, and new exercises.

If you're tryin to lose the belly fat, like i am lol, then you really hafta focus on cardiovascular exercises. Doing abs and sit ups will help, but you can't isolate where you lose fat. If you're gonna focus on your gut, i would highly recommend leg lifts, those babies are killer, but great for the abdominal. It's more important to do full body exercises, and diet right. My roommate gave me a copy of P90X, but i get too bored staring at a screen, i suggest leaving the house to wkout.

FOOD & NUTRITION
I lost about 10 pounds in the last 2 months. But i know losing anything more than 1 or 2 pounds a week isnt healthy. So it's definitely is a long term commitment. The funny thing is that i wasn't even trying to lose weight. My main trick was to start eating organic and healthy. Here's some foods you should incorporate in your diet. I'm no nutritionist, but i've done some research. And these foods have worked for me. It's not necessarily how much you eat, but more of what you eat. You'll also start to enjoy your meals more and have more energy. Make your changes slowly and in small ways, doing everything dramatically all at once will probably be too overwhelming. Take baby steps till it becomes a habit.

Eggs
are probably natures best food, (boil 'em, add ketchup and seasoning if u like, and eat the yolks too, most of the nutrients and proteins are in there. Plus it's actually good cholesterol for you.)

Vegetables
eat lots and lots of vegetables with your meals. They are also fresh snacks. (broccoli, cucumbers, corn, tomatoes, carrots, celery, avocado, cauliflower, peas, etc) Eat yummy salads, but keep dressings at a minimum. I hear vegetables are the best for your digestion, skin, and mind. You can also make a good pasta and add choke vegetables.

Fruits
I love fruits. Find a cheap market if you can, and stack up on peaches, apples, oranges, bananas, strawberries, blueberries, watermelon, you name it. Best snacks are definitely fruits. cherries and berries are super healthy.

Go Nuts
I like cashews, almonds, and macadamia nuts. Sunflowers and cranberries are good to add. Jus don't eat too much, cuz den you'll get stomach ache. dark chocolate is also good for you, juz make sure u brush them teeth after.

Yogurt
one of the best snacks is yogurt with mixed berries, and nuts. Get flavored yogurt cuz the plain organic one is kind of gross.

Lean Meats
For meals, try to eat healthy meats. Stay away from processed meats and fatty ones. Turkey, chicken, steak, salmon, are great. Add tofu too!

Grains
Asian rice is super healthy. I don't like brown rice, but i try to mix it in. Dont over eat in starchy carbs tho. I also don't like brown bread, but small changes like that really help. If you have a weak stomach i would also watch out for fiber, cuz it's tough to digest.

Water
Drink plenty water, and keep yourself hydrated. This is probably my number one greatest tip. I can't stress H20 enough. ionized purified water is probably best, but i jus buy bottled. A gallon of water a day is a lot, but very vital. Drinking water instead of sugary drinks or sodas is key. You'll lose a lot of fat and probably won't get sick.

Big Breakfast
Always start the day with a big breakfast. Small 5-7 meals a day, but emphasize a healthy breakfast. healthy cereal, a fruit, toast, or muffin are great. Your body needs energy right when you wake up, this also helps u burn more calories throughout the day. Force yourself to wake up early, you'll feel better. (this is coming from a guy who cherishes every minute of sleep.)

No Fast Food
I limit myself to once a week, becuz peers always influence me to eat a burger. It's okay to eat your favorite deserts and comfort food here and there, jus keep it in moderation. After you learn about the fat in burgers and fries, you'll be sick of them anyway. Knowledge of how much exercise it takes to burn calories really helps. If you hafta buy out, try subway or something light, or asian food.

Dairy Products
I think it's wise to stay away from too much milk and cheese, altho they are needed according to the food pyramid. Ice cream has choke trans fat, so jus keep it for occasion. You don't have to give up your favorite snacks, jus don't indulge.

Grocery Shopping
In california they have Sprouts (my fav), Trader Joes, Henery's, Fresh and Easy and Korean Markets. Other markets tend to be pricey anyway. Try to shop only on the outer side of the market, cuz processed snacks like chips are deadly, so no buy em. Also stay away from microwavable foods, even tho i heart hot pockets.

Eating Late
Preferably it's better to eat smaller dinners. Eating late isn't necessarily bad, that's just a myth. Your body needs energy while you sleep. Just don't snack super late, like past 11. Always eat till your satisfied, you don't want to be overly full.

Read Nutrition Facts
calculate what your daily intake is, and how much you calories you burn. This is if your really serious. You can also prepare meals before hand (like healthy snack packs in ziplock bags). Avoid foods high in sugar, salt, and saturated fats. Prepare salads and meals without tons of condiments and dressings.

Calorie Intake
to lose weight and body fat, you need to burn more calories then you intake. I dont count calories, but i'm always conscience of what i'm eating. I try to eat smaller meals and in moderation. If you burn an average of 500 calories more than your intake, you'll lose approximately 3000 calories in 1 week, which is 1 pound.

Motivation
It's important to stay consistent and determined in your goals. The best part is seeing results, so make goals for yourself, and stick to them. Visualize a healthier you, and leave no room for compromise. Try to measure results every few weeks, this may help u stay motivated.

Consistency
stay with it! Most people give up way to quickly. Dont give up! Go to the gym at least 3 times a week. Exercise and run even when you don't feel like it. Push yourself to your limits and then some. Try to do something physical everyday, but more importantly watch your diet! You should probably find a reliable wkout partner and someone to diet with ya, it's more fun that way.

Sleep
Have a good sleeping habit. I tend to sleep late, but i hear a good night's rest really boosts your health and mind. Stress really does affect the body negatively, so take a walk, warm shower and dont stress out too much. If u have trouble sleeping, try counting backwards (slowly) from 100 by 4's. works like a charm.

Habits
Don't watch tv when you eat. Eat slow and chew well. It's good to take your time and digest your food properly. Find friends that eat healthy too! Taking poops after meals is also super healthy, so go when nature calls!

Supplements
Doing all natural is fine, but i like to take protein shakes, and multi vitamins (try to find small ones, cuz if ur like me you probably don't like swallowing giant horse pills). I'm also taking glucosamine pills (cuz i got weak joints/bones), acai berry pills (healthiest fruit on this planet) , and kre-alkalyn diet pills that actually work well (make you burn fat, and gain muscle). Don't take hydroxy cut, they're being recalled cuz it's dangerous for your lungs and liver. I don't like to rely on supplements, just make sure u find safe ones. Healthy fruit drinks and bars are good too, but they can get expensive. Also stay away from energy drinks, alcohol, coffee. Eating an apple works 3 times better.

SPIRITUAL
Spiritually, I just got back from a camp retreat, and I really got convicted about a lot of things. I don't really have a spiritual high, but I feel as if I rekindled my first love. I forgot how focusing on God's love for us, motivates us to love God and love others. I especially learned how we are to love the church. Because when we criticize the people of the church too harshly, we are really criticizing His bride. But perhaps one of the best ways to worship God is to genuinely having a loving heart for others. I really need to practice praying for others, and reaching out to others.

I got convicted about truly loving others. Sometimes after I go grocery shopping I see a poor old lady sitting at the gas station, or at least homeless people that are genuinely just really hungry. I often just avoid contact and ignore them. God convicted me about loving the poor, sick and needy. He also convicted me about loving the rich, wealthy, proud, arrogant, selfish, and people who are often irritating. He reminded me to love my enemies, and those who don't treat others with respect. He taught me to truly become a servant for others. To lay down my life for others and to act upon my faith. I am often so concerned with my own spiritual growth and own troubles that I don't pay attention to others. I realize that i really don't pray for others.

I realize that i grow spiritually dry when i don't set aside time to do devotions. I learned how powerful worship and prayer is. God is worthy of all glory and praise. I am even more convicted with being a good steward of my life, time, money, and resources. I often see spiritual disciplines as something i hafta do. But now i am starting to see the intense joy, passion, freedom, and fruit from having communion with God.

I am deeply touched by the church i've been attending. Na Sung Wesleyan church has greatly impacted my faith. From the recent camp retreat I observed true believers that lived out their faith. I saw godly correction and rebuke among brothers. I saw sisters praying together. I experienced the holy spirit speak through people's lives and testimony. I watched the body of the church come together in fellowship and have genuine love for another. I enjoyed many God filled conversations. Laughed among new friends. Stayed up late talking about God's wonders. I was encouraged to press toward the goal, continuing to pursue Christ as my treasure.

God is most glorified when we are most satisfied in Him. When we are delighted in Him, He receives the most praise. There is a deep transformation for those who surrender their sins in repentance. There is a power like no other for those who walk in obedience and abide in Him. There is absolute truth in God's Word. I have fallen in love again with my Bible and seek to keep Christ the center of my life. I am blown away by God's salvation. I have experienced the lavishing grace that God pours out. I have trembled at His intense love that never ever stops pursuing us. God chases us relentlessly, breaking away all our obstacles, and builds us up through all our trials. He sharpens and refines us through the burning fire of His spirit. He enters our hearts, heals us from our sin, offers inexpressible joy, strength and comfort. He never gives up on us. And always loves us just as we are. He is God almighty.

I realize that the less control i have in my life, the greater God can move in my life. God empowers us in our weakness. He becomes our strength when we come humbly before Him. When we live in Faith, we trust that God works everything for our good. Practice having less control, and allow the Holy Spirit to work in your life. Do you continually receive His love and grace in your life? Apart from faith it is impossible to please God, so live by the Spirit and you will bear fruit. Die to sin, surrender your fears, because God is greater. As a Christian, we have freedom in His Spirit. We have victory and a mighty counselor. Yet why do we suffer from low self esteem, addictions, unhealthy guilt, vain regrets, anxieties and other issues. As Christians we should give those things to God and live with joyful freedom in Christ. We are no longer a slave to sin, but a slave to His righteousness.

Emotional
when I first moved to California, I became depressed. I missed my home in hawaii. I missed my family and friends. Plus muggy California weather can get you down too. But emotionally, I feel a lot of joy. I feel extremely blessed to have made new friends at school, church and to have awesome roommates. If you're ever down in the dump, one of the best things to do is find someone who understands you and just express your feelings to them. Writing in a journal helps too. I'm also tryin to learn the guitar, so if u got skills then teach me! I think worship music is also really good for the soul.

Mental
I've been struggling in this area the most. I shouldnt even be offering any advice. My summer greek class is so intense. I often get frustrated with the overwhelming homework and memorization that I just procrastinate and avoid it. Finding a good studying environment outside of home is the best way to get things done. And listening to music always helps me stay alert and focused. I haven't been reading nearly as much as i want to. It's hard to read at home when it's so easy to be lazy. I would suggest turning off the tv and internet. Technology is just too distracting now days.

K im jus rambling on now, so till next time :)

snowball

2010-06-01T18:16:00.000-07:00

Seems like it's time for another blog

Recently I got to move into a new apartment and it is wicked awesome! it's so sweet having my own room and having a big comfortable bed. I haven't had a tv for the past 4 months, so watching tv again has been pretty exciting. Tv can become super distracting, esp when theres tons of good movies on. And it's strange how i can spend hours sitting in front of a screen and yet i cant sit down for 5 minutes in front of a book.

I'm really happy that i have two super bomb roommates. John and Mike are super solid christians, and i'm really blessed to have such strong brothers that live out their faith. We also had 3 cats, wild thing, crow, and snowball. Now we just have snowball and he's the coolest cat ever. Most cats jus run away from me, but this one is super playful and loves my attention.

right now im in summer break and taking two weeks off from school (when i should really be in a Theology class), but ill be takin Greek 1 & 2 for a month or so. But i still go to school to eat at the cafe or hangout with some guys. It was either summer school & work or go back home. Harder, yet more productive.

Oh today i shopped at a korean market for the first time. I didn't realize how much stuff ive been missing out on. tonight i made a shabu shabu meal, which is meat, cabbage, and super bomb rice with sesame seed sauce. I also bought tofu, furikake, lychee, kim chee, and a bunch of onolicious fruits. I also tried nutella for the first time. And my roommate is introducing me to some other foods that he cooks. So i've been having a lot of fun experimenting with new foods. its like being a child again, experiencing food for the first time, lol, one day i'm gonna attempt to make curry. I also wanna try cookin more chicken, salmon, beef, and juicy steaks. i'm pretty decent at pastas and noodles. I also didnt realize how complicated it can be to make korean rice, sometimes its purple, sticky, and has beans (its super yummy). I also wanna try make rice soup (jook) and also fried rice. Who knew i would miss rice so much, lol.

I've also been taking two loong showers a day. Its so refreshing and relaxing. Nothing like a nice warm shower.. back in my old apartment the hot water would only last for a few minutes. now i fall asleep leaning on the wall. After swimmin at 24, i usually like to talk to God in the jacuzzi. Feelin relaxed really helps me communicate better with Him. It's so crazy having such a relentless and intimate God constantly pursuing my heart. His love jus blows my mind away sometimes.

Mike went back to arizona for a while and john hangs with his wife on the weekends, so i felt really lonely at home. But least snowball is always here. He's such a silly cat. I normally don't like him in my room cuz he might pee in it, but i think he's matured. So we we're both kinda lonely, so i let him sleep in my bed with me. He's great company and usually really happy to see you, esp if u feed him, lol. Then i woke up to a bunch of fur all over my bed, lol. even tho im still a dog person at heart, this funny cat has really grown on me.

Lately ive been spending choke money. Least John hooked me up with a free tv, table, chair, AC, couch, lava lamp, and he pays for the gas, water, elec, internet, cable, and other accessories. So living here has honestly been a blast. I might have my parents visit me if I can't go back this summer. I'm hoping to get a job at a church soon, so that'll probably be keepin me in cali. I'm honestly kinda home sick and maybe even a little depressed. I really really miss the beach, family and friends. LOL its funny how i mentioned the beach before family n friends. Im tired of having to always judge the weather, cuz apparently i always dress wrong. I still talk pidgin here too, and no1 gets me. Instead of adapting to california's culture, im on a mission to hawaiian-ize as many as i can, lol. I also miss zippys chili, shave ice, and chicken katsu curry.

Even though i should be takin a summer class right meow, i realized that God has given me the perfect opportunity to find rest and solitude in Him. I've been so stressed out this last semester, that i really just need to spend more quality time with God. I'm really interested in learning more about spiritual disciplines, and actually consistently practicing them. Cuz honestly i've been pretty sloppy with devotions and putting God on hold, so i hope to be more intentional with my free time. This break is my chance to get serious with my goals.

One of my goals is to become a better servant. I have a hard time serving others sometimes. John is a really good influence, and likes to evangelize a lot. So sometime we plan to go feed the homeless and help them out in anyway. I realized that God has blessed me with a lot and i want to become a faithful steward, not only with money, time and resources, but with my life.

Ike and Giana will probably visit over the summer. Me and barocks have been workin out more. I'm starting to really enjoy the gym and playin ball. Exercise has become kinda addicting because i love the burn after a hard wkout. i also like driving around fullerton and lookin at all the appealing restaurants. Ive been spendin a fortune at walmart/target. And one day ill go check out this huge mall thats near by.

thats all for now. this blog is gettin too long, and im sleepy,

ok bye

The Broken Heart

2010-05-15T23:27:00.000-07:00

There is a fragile place deep within
This place has been broken and fractured
This place bleeds relentlessly for a deep love
Who shall offer such peace?

It sits alone, waiting in the cold
aching for just a little warmth
Externally it pretends to look fine
Internally it cries to be held

It reminisces on those happier, easier times
When life was simple and most abundant
It holds on to moments of melting bliss
Where time once stood still

It has locked up these memories
shut deep within its hidden chambers
Never to be reopened or revisited
No one knows about it, and no one seems to care

What was truly precious and valued
has now been taken away and lost forever
days, months and years go by quickly
and yet the matter still urgently remains

It is oppressed with heavy burdens
And haunted by vain regrets
It dwells over the past
And is consumed by its failures

It finds no rest
It knows no peace
The sleepless nights just get longer
Who shall heal these wounds?

It lays by the ashes
holding on to photographed memories
never being able to say farewell
while the rest of the world moves on

It sets sail to a future unknown
where there is nothing but shattered dreams
it begs for a second chance
a chance to go back and make things right

But what's done is done
Nothing can be said or done to make it any better
there is no easy answer
there is no easy escape

It refuses to let go
It doesn't know how to move on
Its uneasy, afflicted, and damaged
Who can cure such a condition?

It has blinded itself from the light
And is consumed by dark thoughts
It has been swallowed into the abyss
Where time cannot heal its scars

It is like an abandoned child
sitting on the street curb
An orphan that no one seems to want
A dirty face with dried up tears

Left alone, he sits in the pouring rain
clinging to his filthy rags
he screams for an ounce of tender love
Who shall bring salvation?

Longing to hear a voice
it drowns in exhaustion
It suffocates, chokes, and gasps for just a single breath
Who can offer such hope?

It observes the crowds of people
Each one walking by without a single glance
It weeps in desperation
wishing for just a single friend

What used to burn with fiery passion
Has become dull and apathetic
Its world has become blurry and colorless
It is abandoned, rejected, and ignored

What used to be full of electric flavor
is now tasteless, plain and bland
It is withdrawn, downcast, and gray
It is isolated in its lonely and empty prison

Wrapping itself in a hollow cocoon
its numbs itself from feeling
It drifts off into a daydream
Because the truth hurts too much

It tries to hold it all together
But realizes that it wasn't meant to be
These happy endings only exist in fairy tales
Who shall deliver it out of its misery?

It has forgotten the sound of laughter
It guards itself from being hurt again
It doesn't know who it can trust
So it turns to counterfeit promises

It is troubled with anxiety
It is restless and weary
It beats uncontrollably
Hoping that someone might come

It desperately tries to change its circumstances
and yet any effort just leads to more suffering
All its shields have been stripped away
It is left vulnerable, unprotected, and defenseless

It is tossed by the raging sea
And swept by the frantic wind
It surrenders to the inevitable
Who shall calm this storm?

It covers itself in shame
And is eaten away by guilt
It wallows in its despair
And pleads for an once of forgiveness

It hides itself from the truth
and is lead astray by lies
It is trapped in delusions
and false realities

It searches its depths for a way out
But each road leads to another dead end
The world has come crashing down
and no stars remain in lite in the sky

These fallen branches
are deserted and without green
They lie lifeless on the ground
where they rot and fade away

It has been trampled on
kicked, beaten, and neglected
It goes left unheard and unseen
Who shall bring an end to this pain?

It whimpers in the shadow of loneliness
It sees nothing but dark emptiness
It has lost its willpower to fight
It is bruised, crushed, and defeated

Its has become numb to its senses
unoccupied, paralyzed and petrified with fear,
It remains motionless, absent and idle
anxious, afraid, trapped in a realm of chaos

Does such a power and grace exist?
Is there such a love that can fully satisfy?
Will someone come to redeem the lost?
Is there a place without suffering?

Who shall grant it stability?
Who shall be its eternal security?
Who shall make it whole again?
Who shall heal this broken heart?

"O to grace how great a debtor, daily I'm constrained to be!
Let Thy goodness like a fetter, bind my wandering heart to Thee
Prone to wander Lord I feel it, prone to leave the God I love
Here's my heart Lord, take and seal it, seal it for Thy courts above"

Disneyland!

2010-05-14T23:39:00.001-07:00

The Promise of Sanctification

2010-05-10T17:44:00.000-07:00

The Promise of Sanctification
by Charles Wesley

God of all power, and truth, and grace,
Which Shall from age to age endure;
Whose word, when heaven and earth shall pass,
Remains, and stands for ever sure:
Calmly to thee my soul looks up,
And waits thy promises to prove;
The object of my steadfast hope,
The seal of thine eternal love.

Chose from the world, if now I stand
Adorn'd in righteousness divine;
If, brought unto the promised land,
I justly call the Savior mine;

Perform the work thou hast begun,
My inmost soul to thee convert:
Love me, for ever love thine own,
And sprinkle with they blood my heart.

Thy sanctifying Spirit pour,
To quench my thirst, and wash me clean;
Now, Father, let the gracious shower
Descend, and make me pure from sin.

Purge me from every sinful blot;
My idols all be cast aside:
Cleanse me from every evil thought,
From all the filth of self and pride.

Give me a new, a perfect heart,
From doubt, and fear, and sorrow free,
The mind which was in Christ impart,
And let my spirit cleave to thee.

O take this heart of stone away,
They rule it doth not, cannot own;
In me no longer let it stay:
O take away this heart of stone.

The hatred of my carnel mind
Out of my flesh at once remove;
Give me a tender heart, resign'd,
And pure, and fill'd with faith and love.

_____________________________

"I will sprinkle clean water on you, and you will be clean; I will cleanse you from all your impurities and from all your idols. I will give you a new heart and put a new spirit in you; I will remove from you your heart of stone and give you a heart of flesh. And I will put my Spirit in you and move you to follow my decrees and be careful to keep my laws" ( Ezekiel 36:25-27 )

This is what the LORD says:
"Cursed is the one who trusts in man,
who depends on flesh for his strength
and whose heart turns away from the LORD.

He will be like a bush in the wastelands;
he will not see prosperity when it comes.
He will dwell in the parched places of the desert,
in a salt land where no one lives.

"But blessed is the man who trusts in the LORD,
whose confidence is in him.

"He will be like a tree planted by the water
that sends out its roots by the stream.
It does not fear when heat comes;
its leaves are always green.
It has no worries in a year of drought
and never fails to bear fruit."

The heart is deceitful above all things
and beyond cure.
Who can understand it?

"I the LORD search the heart
and examine the mind,
to reward a man according to his conduct,
according to what his deeds deserve." ( Jeremiah 17:15-10 )

"If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness." ( 1 John 1:9 )

Come Thou Fount of Every Blessing

God is..

2010-05-05T23:29:00.000-07:00

God is holy
God is faithful
God is sovereign
God is almighty
God is compassionate
God is omnipotent
God is omnipresent
God is omniscient
God is one
God is everlasting
God is eternal
God is infinite
God is incomparable
God is amazing
God is wonderful
God is glorious
God is intimate
God is relentless
God is gracious
God is kind
God is passionate
God is our healer
God is our comforter
God is our freedom
God is our forgiver
God is jealous
God is just
God is unchangeable
God is dependable
God is large and incharge
God is patient
God is strong
God is mighty
God is merciful
God is our satisfaction
God is a foundation
God is trustworthy
God is deeper than the oceans
God is wider than the skies
God is stronger than the mountains
God is brighter than the sun
God is warmer than the sandy beaches
God is more peaceful than the wind
God is more infinite than the galaxies
God is more creative than music
God is more soothing than the rain
God is more beautiful than creation
God is the spring of life
God is the bread of life
God is alive
God is personal
God is our provider
God is most high
God is righteous
God is divine
God is the way
God is truth
God is our friend
God is our defender
God is our redeemer
God is our rest
God is our confidence
God is mind blowing
God is breath taking
God is the author of our salvation
God is the finisher of our faith
God is a consuming fire
God is the same yesterday, today and forever
God is the Creator
God is the Alpha and Omega
God is the beginning and the end
God is the King of Kings
God is the Lord of Lords
God is the good Master
God is the Word
God is outside time
God is all-knowing
God is our Father
God is Christ
God is Spirit
God is our counselor
God is within His children
God is the resurrection
God is the cleanser of our soul
God is the pursuer of our heart
God is the solution
God is our remedy
God is our peace
God is the ruler of all authority
God is the conquer of sin and death
God is our victory
God is our Shepherd
God is the Lamb who was slain
God is the Light
God is pure
God is above all
God is the cornerstone
God is the solid rock
God is our treasure
God is our reward
God is our heaven
God is our perseverance
God is the potter
God is the vine
God is with us
God is our Messiah
God is the Prince of Peace
God is our High Priest
God is the door
God is our guide
God is our refuge
God is our deliverer
God is the head of the church
God is the great I am
God is our Judge
God is our hope
God is our overflow of blessings
God is Jehovah
God is El-Shaddai
God is Emmanuel
God is Adonai
God is our Savior
God is the atonement of our sins
God is our teacher
God is our joy
God is our peace
God is our giver
God is our path way
God is infinitely wise
God is transcendent
God is immutable
God is our reconciler
God is our strength
God is magnificent
God is unlimited
God is abundant
God is perfect in all His ways
God is great
God is worthy of all praise
God is supreme
God is more than enough
God is awesome
God is good
God is gracious
God is love
GOD IS.

The Power of the Gospel

2010-04-22T22:16:00.000-07:00

I jus got back from a small group with a bunch of guys, which was pretty sweet. It's great to have christian brothers that know how to be vulnerable and honest with each other. It seems like most people walk around lugging their baggage with them. It's great to just unload and have people to pray with.

In psychology, they study all about the behavior. Studying how to modify behavior helps, but Christianity cuts to the core issue of why we turn to sin. The condition is of the heart. We only observe behaviors because it's what we can see. But below is a gigantic iceberg that needs to be dealt with. Bringing all our shame, guilt, low self-esteem, addictions, pride, pain, regret, depression, loneliness, anxieties, failures, and heartache to the light is the only way we can really be true with ourselves and with God.

The cool thing is that God sees all our sins and still loves us. He sees us for who we really are. Stop hiding behind your false self and find your identity in Christ. See yourself how God sees us. He values us more than the moon and the stars. We no longer have to live in bondage to our sins. Where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom. God is relentlessly chasing and pursuing us. He desires and invites us into the most intimate love. No one else can offer such an authentic, amazing and unconditional love. No other source can offer such peace, satisfaction, hope, grace, redemption, transformation and salvation. Jesus is the solution, because in Him is life.

Some of us went to see a premier of Jaeson Ma's 1040 movie. That was cool since Biola was one of the first schools it was released to. I didn't realize how much is going on in Asia. It was inspiring to see thousands and thousands of people praying and worshiping. There really is a mass awakening going on in Asia right now, and they really do play a strategic role in spreading the gospel.

God recently pressed on me that I am doing exactly what He has called me to do. I am training to equip and disciple others. I realized even more so, that our church today is in need of correct, biblical, and sound doctrine. Many are being led astray by false teachings, idols, cults, and religions because we have distorted our view of God and misinterpreted His Word. I realized that I am to invest my life drawing from His infinite source and to be pouring out the power of His Spirit. The world is in dire need for the truth of Jesus and the love of God. We are to reach families, children, the rich, the poor, all people, from all nations.

I am definitely thankful for the blessing of education. Even tho it's super duper hard. I see Talbot as training grounds, preparing me to lead, save, nourish, teach and minister. I can see how God is equipping me to build and strengthen His church in faith and worship. The church will become a place for restoration, comfort, and healing. Many Christians are planted, but not many are rooted. There are tons of young Christians who are spiritually dry. We need to be drawing from the well of His living water. The more we abide in Him and the deeper we cultivate the Holy Spirit, the more we'll overflow with God's powerful love. God is Good.

The Raw Truth of Altar Calls

2010-04-17T01:41:00.000-07:00

copied this from a friend's blog

Danger #1:

Individuals can easily be led to believe that their trip down the aisle during “alter call” is somehow equal to salvation. The public act of going forward can intimately associated with the genuine act of faith that confusion result. People begin to believe that they are saved by this act rather than by Christ.

Danger #2

Requiring a public act at the point of salvation can lead a person to think they have done something to get salvation, which compromises the doctrine of grace.

Danger #3:

"Alter calls" can lead to an over-emphasis on the public aspect of decisions. But a public decision for Christ is not always a reliable indictor of true conversion. In fact it is usually the opposite. History has repeatedly shown that public decisions frequently prove to be quite unreliable as barometers of genuine conversions. And Scripture itself teaches that the fruits of true conversion will only be evident in the life of a believer over time.

Danger #4:

"Alter calls" can eclipse the real cause of conversion. The real cause is not the decision or the appeal or the walking of an aisle nor the sinners prayer nor the felt emotion of the moment as emotional music is softly played in the background. True conversion is caused by THE HOLY SPIRIT OF GOD, who draws some to believe as the Gospel is proclaimed. And that will happen whether or not an "alter call" is given.

Danger #5:

Some churches think that they are evangelistic merely because they use "alter calls." But, in reality, many churches are lulled into an evangelistic passivity where their only attempts at evangelism as a church are the "altar calls" at the end of each service. Many of which are so diluted and unbiblical in their presentation of the whole gospel that they are consistently fruitless, regardless of how many people come forward and appear to receive Christ.

Danger #6:

The historical record is indisputable; alter calls(started in 1800’s) have produced mischief.

Gospel presentations have grown increasingly diluted, much shorter and less complete, false conversions have become epidemic in the modern church, and God’s truth and way are being maligned as a result. And countless thousands have been led into emotional response without a clear understanding of just what they’re doing. As a result of this: false conversions have abounded.

2 Corinthians 13:5 says "Examine yourselves to see whether you are in the faith; test yourselves.

Faith

2010-04-12T21:41:00.000-07:00

2010-03-17T02:37:00.001-07:00

Brennan Manning

Spiritual Formation

2010-03-08T15:28:00.000-08:00

Spiritual Formation
I. Sanctification Gap
II. Spiritual Depression
III. God's Discipline
IV. Camp Retreat
V. Sufficient Grace

Man there's so much that happened over this past week. Sorry but you might want get use to my long blogs. I just got back from a camp retreat and God revealed some pretty powerful stuff, so hopefully you can take something from it. During this past week I've felt like a David in many ways, so that's my reason for flooding this blog with choke passages from Psalms.

"I will praise you, O LORD, with all my heart;
I will tell of all your wonders.
I will be glad and rejoice in you;
I will sing praise to your name, O Most High." -Psalm 9:1-2

I. Sanctification Gap
i guess ill start off by sharing what ive been learning in my spiritual formation class. Spiritual formation is jus another fancy way of saying Sanctification, and sanctification is jus another fancy way of saying growing closer into the likeness of Christ and deepening one's relationship with God the Father, Son and Holy Spirit. Spiritual formation also highlights the Christian mystic's practice of spiritual disciplines. It would be wrong to see these disciplines as a works-righteousness, but rather they are ways of cultivating the Holy Spirit and opening our hearts to just receive from Him.

As i described 3 or 4 blogs ago, the Christian often experiences what is called a Sanctification Gap. We have all our ideals of what a Christian should be and look like, but in reality most of us are far from our own ideal of our self. We want to strive to be that Christian who has it all together, who has an intimate relationship consistently; we wanna be that Christian who is disciplined in reading their bible daily, the Christian who is faithful in prayer, the Christian who has tremendous faith, and a Christian who unconditionally loves on others. We want to deny our sinful habits, meet all our own expectations, and do everything to worship the Lord. We could go on naming where, what or who we would like to be, but the matter of the fact is that we greatly struggle with our spiritual growth. We may obtain godly desires, and try with our right intentions, But God is the only one who can fill us with the power of His Spirit, and He is the only way of achieving any spiritual growth.

Many Christians pretend that everything is fine, and this mask can even fool themselves. A Christian can also find themselves burnt out from trying to meet the standard of righteousness and holiness. We want to be good trees who bear good fruit, but what happens when we don't produce anything but shrived up oranges? Hmm.. Maybe this has something to do with branches abiding in the Vine?? Btw, have u ever thought that good fruit, might mean fruit of the spirit? And why does God want us to produce good fruit for??

"Remain in me, and I will remain in you. No branch can bear fruit by itself; it must remain in the vine. Neither can you bear fruit unless you remain in me. I am the vine you are the branches. If a man remains in me and I in him, he will bear much fruit." - John 15:4-5

"But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control." -Galatians 5:22

Lastly, when God prunes a branch, it might be a little hard for us to endure. When a branch that bares no fruit is cut off and thrown in the fire, it isn't talking about hell. It's saying that an idle or paralyzed branch needs to be refined through the fire, so that it can enrich the ground. God who is the gardener keeps a close watch on His vine garden and makes sure that it gets well nourished.

When a woman gives birth to a child, i'm guessing she goes through a lot of stress and pain. When one has to gulp down yucky medicine, it might taste really gross. When a sheep runs astray and continues to do so, the shepherd might break one of it's legs so that he can carry it back. When a child lies or steals, the good father might show him the consequences in order for the child to learn. Trials, correction, rebuke and disciple might be intense while your in the heat of it, but we must know that it is for our best interest and out of His perfect love for us.

William Lane Craig, was asked "If God is such a loving God, why is there so much evil and suffering in the world?" His response was that there are multitudes of reasons. One being that He gives us the choice to choose him or reject him. He also mentions that God doesn't see us as pets and that we should expect a easy, comfortable and luxurious life. Rather God's main intent is to draw us closer into a relationship with Him, in order that we might be redeemed and have eternal life in Him. Our best life is not now.

II. Spiritual Depression
I've been reading a great book by D. Martyn Lloyd-Jones called Spiritual Depression. Here's what i've learned thus far.

What happens when we go through months, seasons and years without much spiritual growth? What happens when the Christian becomes idle and paralyzed from their communication and obedience in God? What happens when we see tons of Christians who are depressed, miserable, unhappy, distressed, dejected, frustrated, discouraged, anxious, and have an absence of joy? Why is this phenomenon such a common trend? What are the causes and cures for this condition? Considering Christianity is the one and only true path of having God in your life, don't you think this picture of a Christian is a horrible witness to unbelievers? A depressed Christian is a contradiction.

There are many ways of diagnosing this common problem, but because everyone is unique, each situation is always different for how an individual should handle their specific condition. Some causes could regard a conflict with one's temperament, it could be from physical exhaustion, or from bombarding anxieties. Two of the main factors that contribute to spiritual depression are past regrets and future fears. But we must learn that we are exactly where we're supposed to be in life, and that God is always with us.

Another reason for spiritual depression is loneliness. I never really felt that lonely in Hawaii, but moving to Cali, i realized how much i am on my own. It sharpens one's maturity because you're forced to be independent. But at the same time, it's quite challenging to go through life without deep relational contact with others. I think i was meant to go through a season of loneliness, so I could really experience how many, if not most people feel. The good news is that we never really are alone. Although God is with us, the church should be a warm place for people to find fellowship. This is why i strongly believe the church needs a stronger bond of unity and doors that welcome others with grace. As His people, we are to love one another.

Sin can also greatly cause spiritual depression. The main reason we turn to idols, addictions and sin is because we aren't satisfied in Christ and we suffer from an unbelief at times. As John Piper says "God is most glorified, when we are most satisfied in Him." In order to be satisfied in Him, we must believe that His love and grace is more than sufficient. This relational transformation requires nothing but trust, and faith that He is more than enough to satisfy us. We need to rely on the Bread of Life to sustain us and abide in His love to grow in His likeness. We need to rely on God in the same way we rely on food to sustain us. God needs to be our nutrition. The desire above all other desires, needs to crave, thirst, and long for an intimate relationship with God. Turn from your sin, pray, seek His face and abide in Him. Take a walk and wait upon Him. Ponder how wide, how long, and how deep is God's love for us. Do whatever it takes to meet with Him.

"Be merciful to me, LORD, for I am faint;
O LORD, heal me, for my bones are in agony.
My soul is in anguish.
How long, O LORD, how long?
Turn, O LORD, and deliver me;
save me because of your unfailing love.
No one remembers you when he is dead.
Who praises you from the grave ?
I am worn out from groaning;
all night long I flood my bed with weeping
and drench my couch with tears." -Ps 6:2-6

"Why, O Lord, do you stand far off?
Why do you hide yourself in times of trouble?" -Psalm 10:1

One book that has always caught my attention was the book of Psalms. In fact one of my favorite characters in the Bible is King David. He obviously had a great struggle to commune with God. Read Psalm 44:23-24, 77, perhaps u might be able to relate in feeling distant from God. Then read Psalm 40, 107 and see how God is a God of sovereign deliverance. He pours our his heart; crying sleepless nights for deliverance. He wrestles with his sin and calls out for God to rescue him from this pit of despair. He is overwhelmed with an unhealthy guilt. If you recall, he had Uriah sent to the front lines of war because he craved Uriah's wife, Bethsheba. He also had enemies constantly pursuing his life. There is evidence that he was even rejected from joining in worship with his people.

It seems David has a hard time accepting the forgiveness of God and of himself. He torments himself for the guilt of his sin. He obviously undergoes a sense of spiritual loneliness. However, he knew that his redemption and stronghold was in God. If there was any hope for peace and for healing, it would have to come through God alone. He pleads with God for comfort, protection, guidance and most of all deliverance.

Sometimes I think God purposely withdraws himself from our senses. His presence is always there, listening to our every need, but out of His perfect love He will often allow us to experience hardship, turmoil, and suffering. Why one might ask? Well i believe this sharpens one's faith. He purposely reveals and redeems us from the bondage and slavery of sin; but will then hide Himself from us so that we might chase and seek. Have u had countless prayers where you feel like it's leaving a phone message for God? Well perhaps this is so we might Wait upon Him and Listen for His Spirit. Perhaps it is to increase our longing, to humble ourselves, and to make us desperate for His comfort.

We are like babies crying, and God doesn't always immediately pick us up. Sometimes He allows us to meditate on what He is trying to teach us. Sometimes it is to test our faith. There are normally a kajillion of reasons why God allows or does anything. But one thing is for sure, is that it's according to his good purpose and for His highest glory, even if we are limited to understand why.

Where will we seek comfort and security? What or who will we run to? Who do we turn to in our time of need? Where will we place our trust in times of distress and loneliness? Behavior modification? Pop psychology? Self help books? Work? Business of ministry? Your own effort? Addictions? Will we seek the approval of others to fill this empty void? What is it that will satisfy you? Or rather who? Who is it that will truly Satisfy you?

"Have mercy on me, O God,
according to your unfailing love;
according to your great compassion
blot out my transgressions.
Wash away all my iniquity
and cleanse me from my sin.
For I know my transgressions,
and my sin is always before me.

"Create in me a pure heart, O God,
and renew a steadfast spirit within me.
Do not cast me from your presence
or take your Holy Spirit from me.
Restore to me the joy of your salvation
and grant me a willing spirit, to sustain me."
Psalm 51:1-3, 10-12

"Yet for your sake we face death all day long;
we are considered as sheep to be slaughtered.
Awake, O Lord! Why do you sleep?
Rouse yourself! Do not reject us forever.
Why do you hide your face
and forget our misery and oppression?
We are brought down to the dust;
our bodies cling to the ground.
Rise up and help us;
redeem us because of your unfailing love." -Psalm 44:22-26

"Why are you downcast, O my soul? Why so disturbed within me? Put your hope in God, for I will yet praise him, my Savior and my God." -Psalm 43:5

When David says "Why are you downcast, O my soul?" He see's his unrighteousness, he wrestles with his sins, but he reflects on the Almighty One. He uses a self talk to counsel himself. We must talk to ourselves instead of allowing 'ourselves' to talk to us. Does that make sense? This actually does work. Remind yourself of your Identity in Christ, the freedom, love and grace of God. Stand up against your discouraged self and preach to yourself. Remind yourself who God is, what He has done in your life, and what God has pledged Himself to do. God is working in our lives, He promises to do so. He calls us His children, would a Father not do everything for our best interest?

III. God's Discipline
Sometimes growing in this process can be hard, but it is only because of His love that He allows us to encounter these circumstances. We may not see the reasoning for why things happen, or why we can often feel distant from God, but normally it's to teach us something that we need to learn. This will produce growth, perseverance, godliness, and a stronger faith in God.

The sanctification package will include suffering and many trials. This is required and necessary to grow us in spiritual maturity. But He will not give us more than we can handle. When someone pisses you off and has conflict with you, How will you respond? Maybe God is telling you to learn to love on those that are hard to love. When we are confronted and challenged will risk, fear, and failure, perhaps God is telling you to step outside your comfort zone and to trust Him.

There's something unique with being transparent with others. I think it allows us to be honest with ourselves. I think confessing our brokenness, struggles, and weaknesses allow us to be vulnerable before God. In our sin and failures, God walks in and says "You're mine. I want you" He purchases us with His precious blood and beautifies us, cleans us, and works us according to His good purpose. This is a great imagery of the doctrine of God's adoption.

For guys it can be hard to show weakness. But hey we got emotions and feelings too ya'know. We do need to talk and discuss what's going on in our troubled hearts. We are not meant to do it all alone. I think it's because our culture portrays the ideal man as tough, strong and independent. The Bible on the other hand, is full of humble men who saw their weakness as their strength. For when we are most weak in ourselves, that's when God becomes our entire strength.

"Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me. But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong." - 2 Cor 12:8-10

IV. Camp Retreat
This past weekend I went to a spiritual formation camp retreat up in the snowy mountains. The hilltop resort was amazing, comfortable and peaceful. The whole place was designed for students to come and find solitude, rest and communion with God. The beds were super comfortable, oh and the food there was also super ono. It was also great to fellowship and bond with a group of believers. The foundation of Christ is really the one and only thing that unifies the body of the church.

I got to do an exercise called footprints. This is writing down all the events, experiences, people, books, places, transitions, and anchors of your faith. This exercise helped me to see how God has been working in my life, how He has been there every step of the way, and how everything has brought me to where i am now. The collection of experiences with God, helped me to see how God really did pursue a relationship with me, and how He intends to do so much more with my life. Pretty gnarly stuff.

We later had a looong group discussion of what people were dealing with lately. I didn't think i had any really hard struggles or problems, but when it came to my turn I basically ended up ballin my eyes out. As a psych major i thought i would normally know what's going on with me internally, so crying uncontrollably in front of everyone was definitely a huge surprise for myself and also kinda embarrassing at first. I think i did fall into pretending that my entire spirituality is alright and doing good. Everyone spoke words of encouragement, laid hands and prayed for me. That love really helped me release a lot that I was holding in. It also brought our group closer together somehow.

But in reality I have been really struggling to communicate with God in prayer. I can spend a lot of time reading about God, I could speak hours about Him, I could think about Him all day, and you guys know I can write hours about Him, but i realized that i struggle to communicate with Him directly. I've been having a really hard time with being intentional with prayer. I desire to talk, wait and listen to Him, but it's just been kinda challenging. So getting away to a place of solitude, simplicity and finding rest in Him was greatly needed for the restoration of my soul.

"Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light." -Matthew 11:28-30

I also think the new transition to California on my own has contributed to a lot of the hidden pain and toil i was experiencing. I guess I was home sick, but too prideful or shameful to admit my own inadequacy. I guess I wanted people to think that i had everything together and I was independent on my own. I guess you could say i was suffering from a sense of loneliness. Leaving my home church, friends I serve with in the high school ministry, my group of friends, and especially my parents was harder that i anticipated.

I figured everything would be alright as long as Christ is my home, and that all i really need is Him. This is true, but i believe God doesn't want us to go through our spiritual growth challenges alone. He purposely gave us the Holy Spirit so that we might have a fellowship with one another. Christians need to be supportive of one another, we need to confess to one another, we need to pray and worship together. I guess I felt alone and troubled, so by God's grace He did provide that community for me. I think there's also something with eating meals with a bunch of Christians. This greatly uplifted my spirit. Lately, great godly discussions over meals or hang out times have been super great. I got to room with a guy named mike, and might even become a roommate at his apartment next semester. We had some great talks stayin up pretty late over the nights. I love discussing the wonders and glory of our sovereign God. I also had a bunch of theological talks which got super deep into many doctrines. (Angels, Sheol, Problem of Sin and Evil, Christology, Origin, Time and Space, God's Wrath and Justice, Free Will and Predestination, Eschatology, Apologetics, the Human Soul, Religions, you name it) In our carpooling of 3 hours travel each way, a smaller group of us really got to bond. Me and mike are kinda younger guys, and Rena and Shaun were almost like another Mom and Dad to us. Going to seminary and meeting people tons of years older than me is really great, because I am really learning and soaking from what they've experienced in life, family and ministry. It's jus fantastic.

I also struggled with my calling for leadership. I often feel like an inadequate Moses. There is absolutely no leadership qualities in me, and I guess that's why God wants to use me also. When we decrease, He increases in us, becoming our strength. I often feel that my introvert skills prevent me or at least make me hesitate to act on what God calls me to do. Because i am so collective and reflective I tend to overly self examine and analyze all my words and actions. To an extent this is very powerful in synchronizing with God, hearing His voice, and constantly checking on the condition of my spirituality, but at the same time it can be my weakness because I have a difficulty taking that risk of speaking what God puts on my heart. Why doesn't a boy participate in a school's basketball try outs, why doesn't he ask a girl out, why doesn't he commit to a act of leadership, why is there such a fear of this failure? Why are we so concerned with impressing and pleasing others? Only God's approval and opinion really counts. It's better to try and fail, then to have never tried at all. It's our failures that are often the best life lessons.

"For the foolishness of God is wiser than man's wisdom, and the weakness of God is stronger than man's strength. Brothers, think of what you were when you were called. Not many of you were wise by human standards; not many were influential; not many were of noble birth. But God chose the foolish things of the world to shame the wise; God chose the weak things of the world to shame the strong. He chose the lowly things of this world and the despised things—and the things that are not—to nullify the things that are" -1 Cor 1:25-28

Where God guides, He also provides. God never calls us to do something without empowering us with His strength. I foolishly ran away from under the hand of God. I figured, I know what I want to do to live for God, and apparently this didn't line up with God intended. For a few weeks if not months, I've been trying to do a lot of spiritual disciplines on my own effort. Perhaps that's why I've been so terrible at it, lol. I felt paralyzed, idle, unproductive, and just dry of the Holy Spirit at times. A relationship with God really does require a constant dependence, and trust in His grace. God who has infinite power, needs to be our source of living a life of worship. It's impossible to love, pray, desire, or even seek Him without His help. Kinda strange when you really think about it. We are responsible for all our sins and failures, but He is responsible for anything good in us.

V. Sufficient Grace
This leads me to the lesson of God's Grace. This is the biggest gift that mankind has rejected. We think our religious activities, self-efforts, own good merits and performances will somehow gain us favor with God. The thing is, God's grace is unmerited favor, it's a free gift of forgiveness. Grace is an imputation or great substitution of trading our sins and receiving Christ's perfect righteousness. One should stop and tremble when they come to receive this. It is not enough to acknowledge the grace of God, we must absorb, receive and accept this grace by faith.

"But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us." -Romans 5:8

As born again Christians, we should no longer see ourselves as "sinners". We are not sinful by nature, because we have been redeemed and have a new nature in Christ by the Holy Spirit. "But hey Chris, don't Christians still sin?" Yes, we still break God's commands of not loving God with all our heart, mind and soul. Yes, we don't always love on others. Yes, we often disobey God and worship idols. It's clear that we still sin, but that doesn't mean God considers us sinners, because Christ already died for ALL our sins. We are therefore saints who still sin. Yes i know it's confusing, but those in Christ should see themselves as adopted children of God. We are no longer orphans, no longer lost sheep, no longer stuck in our sins. We have been redeemed, reborn, regenerated, saved, justified and forgiven.

But if you don't know Jesus, don't have a relationship with God, have zero faith in God, reject Christ as Lord and Savior, follow other man made religions, worship false gods, have no repentance or conviction of sins, then it would be right to consider oneself as still a sinner in rebellion to God. You can either accept or reject Him. To have no say, or no stance is still denying Him. Why not trust in His grace? What's holding you back? Taste and See that the Lord is good. Take refuge in Him. Pray, seek and cry out to Him.

We did a short study of some passages in Romans in my Hermeneutics (Biblical interpretation) class, particularly chapters 6-8. Understanding our identity in Christ is not only huge for our justification (salvation) but also necessary for our sanctification (spiritual growth). Romans ch 1-3 is mainly about Paul's argument of how we are all guilty of sin. 4-5 discusses the transformation and justification through Christ. Romans 6-8 talks about our new nature and sanctification in Christ. 9-11 is about God's sovereignty /supremacy and 12-16 about our service.

I would like to focus on Romans chapters 6-8 because our new nature in Christ is huge! Romans 6 discusses how we are dead to sin and alive in Christ. We are no longer held captive to our nature of sin, we are freed from this bondage of slavery and now made bond servants to righteousness. We are told to count ourselves dead to sin, being crucified with Christ, and now alive by the Holy Spirit. Chapter 7 is one of the most debated passages amount theologians and scholars because it is hard to see if Paul is speaking as an unbeliever or a believer. He talks about how sin reigns in him, how he is held captive to a sinful nature, and still under the law of sin. In Chapter 8 he discusses the law of Grace and how a new covenant of the Spirit has freed him to live a life by the Spirit!

"Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus." -Romans 8:1

I have recently realized that I am way too critical on myself. When God forgives me of my sin, and I refuse to, I am really not trusting in God's grace. I analyze, self examine, and constantly check on my spiritual growth so often, that I can become morbid. I go crazy because I dont always hit my expectations and I dont always live a life of worship. I get angry at my laziness and gluttony. I begin to rely on my own willpower and unconsciously hide my guilt from God. I have learned that instead of always taking my spiritual temperature, I need to be simply going to God as a child and receiving His love with an open heart.

God loves us no more or no less based on our spirituality. He desires us to grow, but he has already forgiven us of our sins on the cross. We are no longer sinners! We by nature are Saints and children of God who do still sin. But now that we are in Christ, God no longer has any wrath or anger against us. We are a new creation in Christ, and it is He who lives within us.

"Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come! All this is from God, who reconciled us to himself through Christ and gave us the ministry of reconciliation: that God was reconciling the world to himself in Christ, not counting men's sins against them. And he has committed to us the message of reconciliation. We are therefore Christ's ambassadors, as though God were making his appeal through us. We implore you on Christ's behalf: Be reconciled to God. God made him who had no sin to be sin for us, so that in him we might become the righteousness of God." -2 Cor 5:17-21

"I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me. The life I live in the body, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me. I do not set aside the grace of God, for if righteousness could be gained through the law, Christ died for nothing!"-Galatians 2:20

"For this reason, since the day we heard about you, we have not stopped praying for you and asking God to fill you with the knowledge of his will through all spiritual wisdom and understanding. And we pray this in order that you may live a life worthy of the Lord and may please him in every way: bearing fruit in every good work, growing in the knowledge of God, being strengthened with all power according to his glorious might so that you may have great endurance and patience, and joyfully giving thanks to the Father, who has qualified you to share in the inheritance of the saints in the kingdom of light. For he has rescued us from the dominion of darkness and brought us into the kingdom of the Son he loves, in whom we have redemption, the forgiveness of sins."
-Colossians 1:9-14

"For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith—and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God" -Ephesians 2:8

"You open your hand
and satisfy the desires of every living thing.
The LORD is righteous in all his ways
and loving toward all he has made.
The LORD is near to all who call on him,
to all who call on him in truth.
He fulfills the desires of those who fear him;
he hears their cry and saves them. "
-Ps 145:16-19

"I will sing of the LORD's great love forever;
with my mouth I will make your faithfulness known through all generations.
I will declare that your love stands firm forever,
that you established your faithfulness in heaven itself." Psalm 89:1-2

"I will extol the LORD at all times;
his praise will always be on my lips.
My soul will boast in the LORD;
let the afflicted hear and rejoice.
Glorify the LORD with me;
let us exalt his name together.
I sought the LORD, and he answered me;
he delivered me from all my fears
Those who look to him are radiant;
their faces are never covered with shame.
This poor man called, and the LORD heard him;
he saved him out of all his troubles.
The angel of the LORD encamps around those who fear him, and he delivers them.
Taste and see that the LORD is good;
blessed is the man who takes refuge in him.
Fear the LORD, you his saints,
for those who fear him lack nothing."
-Psalm 34:1-9

Brennan Manning

The Gospel - John Piper

2010-03-07T11:05:00.000-08:00

lol jus some random videos i found

"But because of his great love for us, God, who is rich in mercy, made us alive with Christ even when we were dead in transgressions—it is by grace you have been saved. And God raised us up with Christ and seated us with him in the heavenly realms in Christ Jesus, in order that in the coming ages he might show the incomparable riches of his grace, expressed in his kindness to us in Christ Jesus. For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith—and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God— not by works, so that no one can boast. For we are God's workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do." -Ephesians 2:4-10

"Consequently, you are no longer foreigners and aliens, but fellow citizens with God's people and members of God's household, built on the foundation of the apostles and prophets, with Christ Jesus himself as the chief cornerstone. In him the whole building is joined together and rises to become a holy temple in the Lord. And in him you too are being built together to become a dwelling in which God lives by his Spirit."-Ephesians 2:19-22

"Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him." -James 1:2-5

"Rather, train yourself to be godly. For physical training is of some value, but godliness has value for all things, holding promise for both the present life and the life to come. " -1 Timothy 7:-8

"Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things." - Philippians 4:6-8

"But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us." -Romans 5:8

"If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness." -1 John 1:9

Taste and See

2010-02-27T18:43:00.000-08:00

"Taste and see that the LORD is good;
blessed is the man who takes refuge in him." -Psalm 34:8

When Jesus has something important to teach, He normally repeats Himself. He gives us so many different illustrations of His identity and how we are to put our trust in Him. One major lesson that has been on my mind for many months now is the concept of abiding in Him. Just as Jesus is in the Father and the Father in Him, we are to be one with the trinity. When God the Father, Son and Holy Spirit fuse within us we can become like Him and reflect His glory. When we are "born again," Christ gives us His righteousness through imputation. The way we carry out His will is through the power of His Holy Spirit, who also teaches us the thoughts of God's holy ways. Just as in a marriage the two become one flesh, we as the church are to become one in the spirit. It's pretty gnarly when we try to comprehend all of that. lol

Spiritual growth, (aka Sanctification) has a lot to do with consistency. In the same way, physical and mental growth have a lot to do with consistency. Have you ever played a sport or ran a mile when being completely out of shape? Imagine if Olympic athletes just showed up to their track meet without any consistent training or preparation. Imagine having to perform a musical concert without any practice or rehearsal. Ever been spiritually exhausted? Well, it's usually because we haven't been very consistent with exercising our spiritual relationship with God. In order to achieve and develop a stronger spiritual growth in Christ, we must become committed, determined and devoted. This fiery passion will result in an extreme want and desire for more of Him. If we really claim to love God as the first priority in our life, should we not be investing quality time with our Lord? When we least feel like praying and spending time with God, that's the time we need Him most.

Why does Jesus almost always speak in parables, riddles, and illustrations? It becomes puzzling to try and understand what He often means. Even for His day the people had a difficult time interpreting His words. But it was clear that no one ever spoke like Jesus did. People were not only astonished by His works of healing and countless miracles, but were intrigued and bewildered by how He spoke. One reason Jesus did this was to hide these mysteries from those who did not bother to seek Him. He speaks in such strange words to draw people to Him. In the parable of the sower, He gives a short talk about scattering seeds to a crowd of thousands, and yet He quickly ends with "He who has ears, let him hear." I imagined that many people left disappointed with hearing such a short and confusing parable. Those that we're actually interested in what He said went after Him and tried to receive understanding of what He meant.

Christ didn't need to spit in mud to make the blind man see. But He commanded the man to go wash His eyes in the water. This allows the man to respond in faith. First of all, no one would like having mud in their eyes, so just allowing Jesus to do that would take some faith, and then to blinding walk to the water also demonstrated this man's faith in the words of Jesus. The reason Jesus doesn't always do things straight forward is so that we can have an opportunity to respond in trusting Him.

Why does Jesus often conceal His identity and tell people not to reveal who He is? Wasn't Jesus trying to gain as many followers as He could? Jesus could have easily declared that He was the Messiah, and in fact He often does in various ways. But the reason He doesn't just tell everyone "Hey guys I'm the Messiah, the Savior of this world." Is because He purposely wants us to individually discover who He really is. In a sense, He wants us to develop a faith in His identity and in His promises.

THE BREAD OF LIFE
__________________
"Do not work for food that spoils, but for food that endures to eternal life, which the Son of Man will give you. On him God the Father has placed his seal of approval."

Then they asked him, "What must we do to do the works God requires?"

Jesus answered, "The work of God is this: to believe in the one he has sent."

So they asked him, "What miraculous sign then will you give that we may see it and believe you? What will you do? Our forefathers ate the manna in the desert; as it is written: 'He gave them bread from heaven to eat.'"

Jesus said to them, "I tell you the truth, it is not Moses who has given you the bread from heaven, but it is my Father who gives you the true bread from heaven. For the bread of God is he who comes down from heaven and gives life to the world."

"Sir," they said, "from now on give us this bread."

Then Jesus declared, "I am the bread of life. He who comes to me will never go hungry, and he who believes in me will never be thirsty. But as I told you, you have seen me and still you do not believe. All that the Father gives me will come to me, and whoever comes to me I will never drive away. For I have come down from heaven not to do my will but to do the will of him who sent me. And this is the will of him who sent me, that I shall lose none of all that he has given me, but raise them up at the last day. For my Father's will is that everyone who looks to the Son and believes in him shall have eternal life, and I will raise him up at the last day."
-John 6:27-40

Isn't it interesting how Jesus displays His identity as the bread of life? In the time of Moses the people relied on manna from God, and in the same way we are to rely on Christ as our source of strength and life. Him being the bread of life is more important than ordinary food. He is all that you need to sustain and satisfy you. He says to eat and drink from Him, and demonstrates the communion with Him at the last supper. I also find it interesting that in John 4:34, Jesus says "My food is to do the will of him who sent me and to finish his work." When we come to the source of life daily, His will abides in us. Our food and our source of life is in Christ alone.

BEHOLD THE LAMB

Behold the Lamb who bears our sins away
Slain for us, and we remember
The promise made that all who come in faith
Find forgiveness at the cross
So we share in this bread of life
And we drink of his sacrifice
And we'll join in the feast of heaven
Around the table of the King

The body of our savior Jesus Christ
Torn for you, eat and remember
The wounds that heal,
The death that brings us life
Paid the price to make us one
So we share in this bread of life
And we drink of his sacrifice
And we'll join in the feast of heaven
Around the table of the King

A Burning Heart

2010-02-26T18:29:00.000-08:00

God is good. Today i woke up to a very lazy start. Whenever i have a day off to myself i often find it difficult to be productive. I usually feel extremely sluggish. It took me a while but God really lifted me out of that internal struggle. After getting to ride my bike around the neighborhood i felt very refreshed. Good exercise seems to open my mind to the Holy Spirit's counseling.

I guess u could say that i've encountered a spiritual rut for the past few days. For the last two months i've been learning and growing a lot in God's Word, but for the last 3-4 days i felt like my guard and pursuit has been down. My mind has been greatly distracted by worldly things. So it's been a tough struggle to sharpen my focus and get my heart back into desiring God. This of course is only possible by receiving God as your strength to love and desire Him.

When we feel far from God, it's hard to worship Him. When we begin to drift from God, it's normally because we haven't spent any intentional and quality time with Him. It seems as if God is always waiting on us to just come to Him and find rest in His love. I know that i can often be stubborn and just want to do things my way. Sometimes i just want to glorify myself and claim control over my life. This is extremely foolish because I know that my life is actually His. Conforming and synchronizing our desires to His will is probably one of the most prudent things we could do.

"I tell you the truth, whoever hears my word and believes him who sent me has eternal life and will not be condemned; he has crossed over from death to life." -John 5:24

Jesus answered, "Everyone who drinks this water will be thirsty again, but whoever drinks the water I give him will never thirst. Indeed, the water I give him will become in him a spring of water welling up to eternal life." -John 4:13-14

After watching two movies on Martin Luther and getting to study his works at school, I have been greatly reminded of how important repentance is. Luther's conscience over his sin lead him to feel an overwhelming and unhealthy guilt. Indulgences, confessions, penance, and other spiritual disciplines of the Roman Catholic Church gave him no peace. He realized that the only way to be freed from sin was to place his faith and trust in Christ alone. Traditions, rituals, saints, and worshiping relics did nothing to atone for his sins. Justification is by grace through faith in Christ alone.

"For in the gospel a righteousness from God is revealed, a righteousness that is by faith from first to last, just as it is written; "The righteous will live by faith." -Romans 1:17

"But now apart from the Law the righteousness of God has been manifested, being witnessed by the Law and the Prophets, even the righteousness of God through faith in Jesus Christ for all those who believe; for there is no distinction; for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God, being justified as a gift by His grace through the redemption which is in Christ Jesus; whom God displayed publicly as a propitiation in His blood through faith This was to demonstrate His righteousness." -Romans 3:21-25

"My sheep listen to my voice; I know them and they follow me. I give them eternal life, and they shall never perish; no one can snatch them out of my hand." - John 10:27-28

Sometimes we try to deal with sin on our own. Sometimes we numb our minds and don't even bother to acknowledge them. Sometimes we hide it deep within us, and make sure no one knows how sinful we are. Sin has always been man's problem, it's what separates us from God. No amount of good works will ever make up for God's just judgment. No religious activities will satisfy the wrath our sin deserves. No amount of self-effort will make us righteous before God's throne.

But the good news is that there is a way to become clean and forgiven of all our sins. God came down in the fullness of a man named Jesus Christ. He is the Light of this world, the Bread of life, and the Shepherd to the lost. He alone is the Gate to salvation. He welcomes all. He offers a free gift of grace and love. Forgiveness and salvation can be found no where else. Christ satisfied the wrath of our sins on the cross. He is the Holy Lamb of God, the only One worthy to atone for our iniquities. He offers us eternal life and redemption. Place your trust in Christ.

Jesus answered, "I am the Way and the Truth and the Life. No one comes to the Father except through me." -John 14:6

After u come to know Christ, it doesn't stop there. He continues to grow and teach you things of the Spirit. He reveals more and more of His heart. We don't need to wait for heaven to have a relationship with Him. He sweeps you off your feet, and sustains you in His warm embrace. He is never stagnant or dull. He continues to renew us and encourages us to take a step closer to Him. He always satisfies, always endures, His love never changes, He remains the same yesterday, today and tomorrow. His love for us existed before we we're even created, and His love will last for eternity. His love never fails or fades.

Now our part is to just freely receive His love. We got the good end of the deal. Christ became our sin, and we inherit His righteousness. We become a new creature and can live in victory over our sin. Cry out for His Holy Spirit. Break off the chains of sin and declare freedom in His Name. Surrender your heart.

Many of us who know Christ can encounter a dwindling flame. We become like flickering embers in the wind. We find it hard to love because we ourselves are spiritually burnt out. So easily do we forget to rekindle our first love and to abide in Him. Sit at His feet and just listen for a while. When we are desperate for God to breathe His Holy Spirit on us, a consuming fire ignites the deepest part of our soul. When we are filled with His Spirit, we have no option but to tremble with an intense passion and burning zeal. This results in a courageous and contagious life. We are not called to live lukewarm lives. As God's children we are called to share the warmth of His love and to be a light in the darkness.

We are like disconnected laptop computers. Our battery life gets down to 2% and we can barely function and operate. Allowing sin to reign in our lifestyle is like having pop ups and viruses. The only One who can cleanse us and delete these viruses is Christ. But we need to plug in and recharge our soul daily. When we become bombarded with life, its easy to just focus on our stressful problems and set aside Christ. We become so concerned with our temporary needs and selfish desires that we don't make any time or place for Christ. Wait upon Him, listen, meditate, pray, tune out the world for a second and just spend time with the Living God.

"If God so clothe the grass of the field.. shall He not much more clothe you?" -Matt 6:30

My Utmost For His Highest
-Owsald Chambers

"A warning which needs to be reiterated is that the cares of this world, the deceitfulness of riches, and the lust of other things entering in, will choke all that God puts in. We are never free from the recurring tides of this encroachment. If it does not come on the line of clothes and food, it will come on the line of money or the lack of money; of friends or lack of friends; or on the line of difficult circumstances. It is one steady encroachment all the time, and unless we allow the Spirit of God to raise up the standard against it, these things will come in like a flood.

"Take no thought for your life." "Be careful about one thing only," says the Lord, "your relationship to Me." Common sense shouts loud and says, "That is absurd, I must consider how I am going to live, I must consider what I am going to eat and drink." Jesus says you must not. Whenever there is competition, be sure that you put your relationship to God first. "Be anxious for nothing."

The Nails in Your Hands

2010-02-22T00:28:00.000-08:00

The Rug

The Good-o-Meter

Emmanuel > "God With Us"

2010-02-17T00:49:00.000-08:00

What has God been teaching you lately?

Sometimes we can have a very difficult time answering this question. It's usually we haven't really spent any time with Him lately, or because we don't even acknowledge God in our lives.

It's absolutely amazing what 10 minutes of reflection and prayer can do for the soul. Now days things are too fast. Sometimes we just need to take time to slow things down a little and just clear our minds. It's hard to hear someone whispering when everything is loud and crazy. Find that secret, quiet place where you can be alone with God. Meeting with God produces a wonderful joy and a calm peace. It's like a breath taking sunset. Stop to receive the warmth of His love.

"Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light." -Matt 11:28-30

Sanctification & Desires
Sometimes we go through seasons we're we really don't grow much. Sometimes we get stuck in a pit and just fell stagnant. Sometimes we just hit a wall where we become paralyzed and idle.

In this world there are too many distractions. It's so easy to lose our focus and take our eyes off of Christ. It's so easy to put our trust in things, people and ourselves. Sometimes it helps to stop and look at what we worship. What do we idolize before God? What is competing for our heart?

It's strange how easily we can forget our first love. It's strange how we can trade a blessing from God for something worthless. Our minds have become so vulnerable to the ways of this world.

We seek for something to satisfy. We are constantly craving for pleasure. We thirst for something to fill. We intensely desire something to satisfy our often empty soul.

C.S. Lewis on Christian Hedonism

If there lurks in most modern minds the notion that to desire our own good and earnestly to hope for the enjoyment of it is a bad thing, I submit that this notion has crept in from Kant and the Stoics and is no part of the Christian faith. Indeed, if we consider the unblushing promises of reward and the staggering nature of the rewards promised in the Gospels, it would seem that our Lord finds our desires, not too strong, but too weak. We are half-hearted creatures, fooling about with drink and sex and ambition when infinite joy is offered us, like an ignorant child who wants to go on making mud pies in a slum because he cannot imagine what is meant by the offer of a holiday at the sea. We are far too easily pleased.

That's it! The enemy of worship is not that our desire for pleasure is too strong but too weak! We have settled for a home, a family, a few friends, a job, a television, a m microwave oven, an occasional night out, a yearly vacation, and perhaps a new personal computer. We have accustomed ourselves to such meager, short-lived pleasures that our capacity for joy has shriveled. And so our worship has shriveled. Many can scarcely imagine what is meant by "a holiday at the sea"-worshiping the living God!

Why settle for a mud pile when God has a beautiful ocean for us. Perhaps it's because we can't see it. Perhaps because it is inconceivable that something better actually exist. The greatest buzz and pleasure one could ever get is only found in the delight of God. Taste and See.

"Everyone who drinks this water will be thirsty again, but whoever drinks the water I give him will never thirst. Indeed, the water I give him will become in him a spring of water welling up to eternal life." -John 4:13-15

Many Christians focus on the Ideals of what a Christian should look like. And instead admitting our reality we often mask our struggles. This is known as the Sanctification Gap. 5 common responses to this include,

1) Pretense- Pretending that we're all good, hiding our sin. We fear the reaction of being honest with another.

2) Despair - We get so frustrated because we never feel like we can do or be enough. We get discouraged when we can't accomplish our goals, or make any progress. The ideal of a Christian asks too much of us, so we lower the bar. We beat ourselves up with an unhealthy guilt.

3) Programmatic and Personal Solutions - We figure, "i'll just do this." We attempt to fix the problem with formulas instead of coming to God.

4) Moral Formation - This is the "Do it yourself" method. We rely on self-help, our own efforts, sheer will power, self disciplines, and try so hard that we often get burnt out from our constant failures. We ice out the dependence of the Holy Spirit.

5) Ministry Activism - We make ministry an idol. We try to stay busy with working to distract ourselves and avoid the gap of our lack of spiritual growth.

I know I often talk about Sanctification, but I think it's because there is a lack of emphasis of it. Sanctification is just a fancy way of saying "growing in the likeness of Christ, dying to our sins, and growing closer to God." In order to change our behaviors, attitudes, and actions we must first desire to do so. We must change our desires to become better. The more we can decrease the more He increases in us.

Ask yourself, "What do I truly desire most?" It's often what you think about most. What we desire most, we often spend the most time doing. When we can desire God, it becomes so much easier to grow and to actually want to know Him more intimately. We must conform our desires to God's desires. Imagine if all your values and desires we're that of God's. What if you hated what God hated, and loved what God loves. What if you syncronized your heartbeat with God's? What would your life look like? I believe this is the start of transforming our lives into the likeness of His righteousness.

Who do we seek to please? Count how many times in a day we seek to impress or attract the appreciation or approval of others. What are you motivated by? What do you want more than anything else? What do you live for? What would you die for? Our deepest desires are reflected in our thoughts and actions.

For us to grow, God gives us trials. He never gives us more than we can handle. For instance, He doesn't give a 1st grader a calculus problem. We start off with addition, subtraction and work our way to the next level until we can handle more. The greatest treasure and joy is worth suffering for.

"Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him." -James 1:2-5

If you want to get better, you must increase the level of difficulty. I'm comparing spiritual growth to physical growth. If you want to get stronger, you can't just stick to doing the same 10 pound dumbells. You could start by doing different exercises, more repetitions of it, or increasing the weight. But often times we perfer to stay in our comfort zones than face any training. Olympic athletites are dedicated, passionate, and desperate for achiving their goal, all so that they can attain that first gold medal prize.

"For physical training is of some value, but godliness has value for all things, holding promise for both the present life and the life to come."

If we arn't growing spiritually, its probably because we arn't trying to. You are as close to God as you want to be. If you truly desire to be closer to God, i'm sure you'd try to spend more time with Him. We have a active and passive role in allowing God to work in us. We have a responsibility and role in seeking Him.

So again.. What has God been teaching you lately?

Can All Religions Be True? - William Lane Craig

Reflection on Prayer

2010-02-13T13:14:00.000-08:00

I never had to pray for a homework assignment, but I learned a lot through praying for 45 minutes. Even though this praying time was for a spiritual formation project and class requirement I felt that it was desperately needed for my soul. Praying also helped me rediscover how important it is to just sit at His feet. I haven’t prayed that long for a while. I usually find it hard to just sit down and pray for longer than 5 minutes. My mind often wonders and gets distracted by other thoughts. But for this prayer project, I was quite successful in keeping my focus on spending time and praying.

After I dimmed the lights, turned on some calm worship music, and sat down, I decided to start by praying aloud. I think praying aloud helped me to focus on communicating my thoughts to God. I was also trying to be careful not to fall asleep. I also used a journal to write out some things I wanted to pray for, and had no problem filling out a few pages with ideas.

Eventually I got too comfortable on my couch and almost caught myself falling asleep. So I did some jumping jacks and push ups to get my blood flowing again. Then I just sat up straight and ended up with kneeling with my face to the ground.

I mostly prayed for how God could help me grow spiritually. I did pray for individuals who were sick, lonely, and who don’t know Jesus. I think I covered about 20 people within my family and friends. I tried to be more specific in praying for them because otherwise my prayers just seemed to be meaningless words.

I prayed for my roommates who are going through a rough conflict. I know that they are both hurt and need much healing. I also prayed that I would be able to find a good church ministry to be apart of and to also meet some new friends. I prayed for those who are lost, hungry and are in desperate need. I prayed for the lost, and that my compassion would grow for those who don’t know Christ. I also prayed for people in Haiti, even though I don’t know exactly how bad it is over there.

God says to ask things according to His will in His Name and that He would freely give it to us. I basically exercised that by asking God for a lot of things. The things I prayed for myself included maturity, humility, discipline, righteousness, motivation, joyful obedience, focus, submission, stronger trust, forgiveness, peace, patience, spiritual consistency, deeper repentance, clear understanding, discernment, and to grow into the likeness of Jesus.

Other categories that I focused on were how I should deal with bad dreams, because I had a pretty disturbing dream this morning. I cried out for purity and holiness of my thoughts. I prayed for God to protect my mind, eyes and heart. I noticed I feel a lot farther from God when I allow my sin to corrupt my thoughts and actions. I prayed that I would guard what goes into my mind, and that even my thought life would worship Him.

I prayed for a more intimate relationship with God, where I can spend more intentional and quality time with Him. I want to truly learn what it means to abide in His love and to be engulfed by His Holy Spirit. I prayed for God to change my heart. That I might decrease so that He would increase in my life. I prayed for complete surrender and to increase in faith. I desired that I would be able to desire Him more, and that He would help me to love Him. I realized I can’t really do anything on my own strength. I want to practice emptying myself and allowing Him to fill me to a point where His love overflows out of me. I could really improve on loving others. But I was reminded that the more I absorb and soak God’s love, the easier it becomes to love others.

I shortly prayed for how He would reveal His will to me. I have been a little unsure if I was on the right path, and He made it quite clear that this is where I should be. And He also reminded me that I should just trust His guidance as He leads me step by step. I prayed that my desires would conform to His desires. I want my heart to bleed and burn desperately for Christ alone. I want to grow in His likeness and to know His heart. I want my heart to switch into a joyful mood and be more thankful for His grace. Sometimes just desiring to desire God more helps me to be more reflective.
Lately, I have been compromising in how I spend my time. Often I would rather spend time on the computer or sleep than read my devotions. So I prayed that my hunger for God’s Word and that my thirst for intimacy would sky rocket. I prayed that I would be steadfast, immovable, always abounding and rooted on top of Christ the solid Rock. I prayed that I would continue to grow and bear much fruit. I prayed that I would be a light and not hesitate to witness to others. I prayed that I would take just a step closer and closer to Him. I prayed that I would be relentless in my pursuit of His righteousness and not let sin stand in my way. And I was reminded of how sufficient and satisfied I am in Christ alone. Worry and fear have no place in my life. I want to rely solely on God alone.

I have been a little stressed out with things and very distracted from spending quality time with God. I broke out in hives the other day, and had to see a doctor for my reoccurring ulcerate colitis. I have been so burnt out that I had forgotten to pray about my troubles. I wish that I could pray and turn to God immediately no matter how big or small the issue may be. I prayed that I would begin to pray more, because I definitely lack in talking directly to God.

I often think about God. I can read about Him in scripture. I can write pages about Him and His salvation. I can listen to hours of sermons. But I realized that I don’t nearly spend enough time talking directly to God. I realized that He is always waiting for me to come to Him in prayer. And that He always gives me His full attention. I guess I just need to find the right habit of meeting with God one on one. I need to practice waiting and listening to His voice. I just want to be more intentional with being absolutely alone with my Abba Father. Another lesson is that I never have to ask Him for His love, because He is always loving me intensely.

“I tell you the truth, my Father will give you whatever you ask in my name.”- John 16:23

“Because your love is better than life, my lips will glorify you.”
–Psalm 63:3

“I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me. The life I live in the body, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me.” –Gal 2:20

“We have not received the spirit of the world but the Spirit who is from God, that we may understand what God has freely given us. This is what we speak, not in words taught us by human wisdom but in words taught by the Spirit, expressing spiritual truths in spiritual words.”
-1 Cor 2:12-13

Abba

2010-02-09T00:29:00.000-08:00

Just the usual revelations of what God has been teaching me lately.

While studying about Martin Luther who lead much of the protestant reformation, I was reminded of what joy our salvation grants us. God's grace never gets old. You never outgrow your need for the gospel. You can never get tired of God's infinite and unconditional love. His Holy Spirit is so powerful at times, it overwhelms me to know that i have such a direct, deep, and intimate relationship with the living God of this universe. And i like how God gives me His entire and full attention at all times. He isn't some busy God that you have to wait in line for. In fact He's usually always waiting for us to connect with Him. But i also like how He can sweep our feet and grab our attention when we're oblivious to Him.

Anyways, going back to Martin Luther. I'm really excited with the material im reading for all my classes. I'm finally getting to learn about the church history, the great leaders of the reformation, sanctification and how to interpret scripture more accurately. Seminary is going great, i'm really enjoying it. The more my theology and understanding of God's Word increases, the more appreciation I have for His work in my life. Just pondering the assurance of our salvation and how we can have forgiveness of all our sins is just incredible. We not only get free forgiveness, but also inherit the righteousness and likeness of Jesus! There is absolutely nothing in us that would deem us worthy of His grace, and yet He adopts us as His children and beautifies us to completion. We become a new creation, by putting off our old self and putting on the new. Our souls are secured for eternity with Him. The relationship starts now, we can be as close or as far as we desire to be. If you truly want to know Jesus, then I'm positive you'll find Him if you seek with all your heart.

I also heard something on the radio that was interesting. I love how God uses history in the old testament to be examples that tie into Jesus. For instance the many similarities of Joseph and Jesus. The rapture of Noah's ark. But out of all the examples we're given, I like how many links there are between Moses and our God's redemption.

For instance, how Moses saved the Israelites from Egyptian bondage and slavery. And how they forgot how God saved them and lead them through the red sea. This is quite like how we we're once slaves to sin and how we often forget of our salvation. While they were in the desert they began grumbling and wanted to go back. Even if God presents us with trials and tribulation, it is only meant to sharpen our faith. Where God guides, He also provides. God still provided manna for His choosen people, just as Christ is our Bread of life. Then as Moses stuck a rock and water came gushing out of it, just as Christ is the Rock and pours out His living water. In short, Jesus is always completely sufficient. He is all I need. He will always provide for us. He upholds and sustains me through all storms. I am completely satisfied in Christ alone.

"God is most glorified when we are most satisfied in Him."

As I was thinking about the verses where Christ says, "If you remain in me and my words remain in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be given you" He constantly mentions to ask in His Name, according to God's will and God will give us everything we need. An illustration that John Piper once used goes something like this.. "Sometimes we find ourself in a situation where we are in a coma. We are bedridden and cant move a muscle. Our legs, arms and entire body can't move, except for our mouth. Sometimes the best thing we can do to glorify and worship God is to just ask Him for His help. We can try to move around, struggle to grab something, or try to feed ourselves, but we end up just becoming fustrated relying on our own strength. Instead we could turn to our Abba Father who is always at our bedside, and just simply ask Him to help us drink a juice box or something. Abba Father will gladly tend to the cares of His children. So as we start off our days, remember to simply ask Him, and He will gladly provide through the power of the Holy Spirit.

Playing with Fire

2010-02-05T21:53:00.000-08:00

Seminary
I am really enjoying my graduate education at Talbot School of Theology. The Biola campus is like a Christian utopia. Everyone is a Christian and loves Jesus! Its truly amazing to be surrounded my so many people filled with the Holy Spirit. I am really impressed with their faculty and teachers. Although the work load is heavy, I am grateful that I get to study material I want to learn. I'm taking Spiritual Formation where I get to prayer projects, have small groups, reflect on my walk, and go on a retreat. I'm also taking Reformation and Modern Theology, which is all about church history, and the study of great reformation leaders such as Calvin, Luther and Augustine. Survey of Matthew to Revelations seems like a difficult class, but it's great to take a closer look at the New Testiment books. And lastly my Hermenutics class, which i talk about more later.

Coffee on my Shoes
Early this morning i went to a prayer meeting on campus. They had coffee and bagels. I got to meet some cool people and also got to start off the day by praying in fellowship. I noticed I can read a lot about God, talk a lot about God, think a lot about God, learn a lot about God, write a lot about God, but how much do i actually talk to God personally? So this is something i would like to work on and increase in.

After the meeting i had to rush off to class, but as i was saying my goodbyes I shook someone's hand and spilled my coffee all over my fairly new shoes, and the white part became stained. But instead of reacting to it, i was instantly okay with it. I realized that earthly things will all pass away anyway.

Later that day i went to by books. As I reached for my wallet, i noticed it was gone! So i backtracked my steps, checked my car, back at the apartment, and i finally found it back at the front desk near the prayer meeting was at. I was freaking out the whole time, but God also used that to have me run into a bunch of people. I got to meet and talk with 4 or 5 people just because I was on a different path than what I would have originally been.

The main lesson of spilling coffee and losing my wallet was to notice that things often go wrong. And when things don't go according to your plan, it's usually things that are meant to happen, and God can even use small things to change the path of our direction. When things do go wrong we must remember not to get so upset or panic over the little things. We blow up small problems when other people have it way harder than us.

Wet Laundry
A week ago i remember being really angry because my laundry was pissing me off. I had some conflict with a lady at the laundry room, my clothes ended up being soaked, and I kept paying the drier to dry it but it didn't do it's job well. And i remember being so upset over wet clothes and all the time I put into trying to get it dry.

Another lesson I've been relearning is the value of patience and forgiveness with others. Sometimes I can get so annoyed with people that I let small things bug me. God is teaching me to see people the way He sees them. Every time i think or say something negative about someone, especially if it's a Christian, I know God rebukes me and says that He doesn't like me talking about His bride that way. I guess patience also goes along with humility, and crucifying your own idea of how things should be. God is ultimately in charge, and He allows us to encounter these trials to test our faith.

Hermeneutics
I'm really enjoying my hermeneutics class at talbot. Hermeneutics is just a fancy way of saying "how to interpret scripture". I've been learning a lot about how we can bend scripture in so many ways by taking it out of context and not looking at the author's intent. I'm reading a book called Playing with Fire, and it has some deep nuggets of truth about how we should interpret scripture.

The book also talks about how most people fall into error while trying to interpret scripture, because they don't study the historical, cultural, grammatical, literary and genre of each passage. It's important we know the author's audience, his intent, and background before we begin coming up with conclusions. We are so quick to try and make meaning out of a verse that we don't take the time to investigate it in it's context and genre. A huge mistake i have made when running bible studies is asking "So what does this verse mean to you?" or "what do you think it means?" Cuz then we have all sorts of interpretations to a specific passage. Rather it is better to ask, "So what does this passage mean?" Leading to what it means then and there, before we jump to here and now.

"I think the primary confusion comes when we move from reading or interpreting a text right into applying the text to our particular place in life - an application that may be absolutely appropriate for our own situation. The problem comes when we call that application or insight for our own life an "interpretation," which would make it a universal, rather than a particular, insight that God may well intend for us to receive."

"Spiritual or formational reading is the exact opposite of informational reading. Instead of the text being an object controlled by us, the text becomes the subject; we, in turn, become the "object" addressed by God through the text." Basically we are not to place ourselves over the bible, but under the authority. Instead of interpreting the Bible, we must let the Bible interpret us.

The book goes on to talk about how we should experience a heartburn or burning heart when we read God's Word. The main thing God uses to transform us into the likeness of Christ is through His Word. Looking back about 2 years ago, I can see how much reading God's Word has shaped me and grown me closer to Christ. I guess you could say that i am obsessed with spiritual growth. I never want my walk with God to be dry, stagnant, empty, boring or dull. At times I have gone through those seasons. But until the day I die, I want my life to reflect Christ as much as it possibly can. I want this desire to light the flames of others. I want the likeness of Jesus.

Some other lessons im reminded of are not to compromise my morality for a shortcut, how God's grace never gets old, how Christians can still have many idols, the power of fellowship/prayer, and our complete depravity without the Holy Spirit. But i dont feel like blogging all of that, cuz i got tons of books to read for school now.

- Isaiah 55:6-13

Seek the LORD while he may be found;
call on him while he is near.
Let the wicked forsake his way
and the evil man his thoughts.
Let him turn to the LORD, and he will have mercy on him,
and to our God, for he will freely pardon.

"For my thoughts are not your thoughts,
neither are your ways my ways,"
declares the LORD.

"As the heavens are higher than the earth,
so are my ways higher than your ways
and my thoughts than your thoughts.

As the rain and the snow
come down from heaven,
and do not return to it
without watering the earth
and making it bud and flourish,
so that it yields seed for the sower and bread for the eater,

so is my word that goes out from my mouth:
It will not return to me empty,
but will accomplish what I desire
and achieve the purpose for which I sent it.

You will go out in joy
and be led forth in peace;
the mountains and hills
will burst into song before you,
and all the trees of the field
will clap their hands.

Instead of the thornbush will grow the pine tree,
and instead of briers the myrtle will grow.
This will be for the LORD's renown,
for an everlasting sign,
which will not be destroyed."

-Psalm 19:7-14

"The law of the LORD is perfect,
reviving the soul.
The statutes of the LORD are trustworthy,
making wise the simple.

The precepts of the LORD are right,
giving joy to the heart.
The commands of the LORD are radiant,
giving light to the eyes.

The fear of the LORD is pure,
enduring forever.
The ordinances of the LORD are sure
and altogether righteous.

They are more precious than gold,
than much pure gold;
they are sweeter than honey,
than honey from the comb.

By them is your servant warned;
in keeping them there is great reward.

Who can discern his errors?
Forgive my hidden faults.

Keep your servant also from willful sins;
may they not rule over me.
Then will I be blameless,
innocent of great transgression.

May the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart
be pleasing in your sight,
O LORD, my Rock and my Redeemer."

Living Water

2010-02-03T23:06:00.000-08:00

God of Justice

Funnel
Today God has increasingly revealed that I am to act as a funnel. I am only to be a vessel for Him. I pray that I would conform to His will and that my words that I speak would be His. My entire life is to be a reflection of Christ. I am to imitate Christ and walk in His likeness. Yes it may be impossible to follow in His footsteps and I will fail countless times, but we are all called to be holy has He is holy. We must take up our cross and pursue His righteousness at all cost. We are all a work in progress, and it is God who ultimately works us to completion. The closer we grow our relationship with Him and the deeper we abide in Him the greater we will look and act like Him.

"As the deer pants for streams of water,
so my soul pants for you, O God.
My soul thirsts for God, for the living God." -Psalm 42:1-2

Isn't it fascinating how the Holy Spirit works through us? How crazy is it to know that we have the best counselor dwelling within us?! We can't worship, surrender, transform our hearts or do anything right without God's help. This is why it is extremely, extremely important that we prioritize receiving from God.

"All our vows and resolutions end in denial because we have no power to carry them out. When we have come to the end of ourselves, not in imagination but really, we are able to receive the Holy Spirit."
-Oswald Chambers

I feel like i'm just supposed to spit out whatever the Holy Spirit teaches me. As for this season of life im in, i feel that im supposed to focus on equipping myself with the knowledge of His Word, as well as growing more intimate with God. (As a side lesson, I must also be disciplining myself to watch out for distractions and not always just take the easy short cuts in life.) God always trains and prepares His people before He sends them out. As of now, God is filling me up. And although i may not be in any ministry or missionary work, our entire life is to act as a ministry to others. So i am definitely learning to always look for the opportunities to pour out God's love.

"Don't sacrifice your future on the alter of now."

Footprints
God has also been teaching me to slow down and wait upon His guidance. Sometimes i run a little too far ahead before Him and try to do what I think would be good, but God has been telling me to set my agendas aside and just wait for His lead. Lately, i've been wanting to do certain things, find work, get ahead of school work and carry on with other task, but God seems to be putting certain people on my path. There's a big difference of someone that distracts you from following in God's footprints in the sand, and stopping along His path to meet, share, fellowship and love on someone. Sometimes we can get so caught up with our plan, that we miss divine moments to just sit and talk with someone. We must always be reminded to be patient and aware of how the Spirit of God leads us. Although we think we know best, God always knows what best for us. Don't run ahead of God, wait, and follow.

"Therefore, prepare your minds for action; be self-controlled; set your hope fully on the grace to be given you when Jesus Christ is revealed. As obedient children, do not conform to the evil desires you had when you lived in ignorance. But just as he who called you is holy, so be holy in all you do; for it is written: "Be holy, because I am holy." -1 Peter 1:13-16

"Therefore, I urge you, brothers, in view of God's mercy, to offer your bodies as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to God—this is your spiritual act of worship. Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will." -Romans 12:1-2

My challenge and prayer to any readers out there, is to seek the will of God. Look for the evidences of His grace today. Look for how His Holy Spirit leads and guides. Pray for revelation and vision. Meditate on His Word. Receive His love as a funnel and let it overflow out of your life, it will greatly enrich everyone around you. I hope no one takes these blogs the wrong way. Although it can sound like it, I by no means am i trying to act as some profound know-it all guru, lol. My only desire is to make Him known and to share His teaching as He teaches me. ok bye!

"He guides me in paths of righteousness for his name's sake." -Psalm 23:3

"In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groans that words cannot express. And he who searches our hearts knows the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for the saints in accordance with God's will. And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose. For those God foreknew he also predestined to be conformed to the likeness of his Son, that he might be the firstborn among many brothers. And those he predestined, he also called; those he called, he also justified; those he justified, he also glorified." -Romans 8:26-30

Mighty to Save

Everyone needs compassion
Love that’s never failing
Let mercy fall on me
Everyone needs forgiveness
The kindness of a Saviour
The hope of nations

Saviour
He can move the mountains
For my God is mighty to save
He is mighty to save
Forever
Author of salvation
He rose and conquered the grave
Jesus conquered the grave

So take me as You find me
All my fears and failures
Fill my life again
I give my life to follow
Everything I believe in
Now I surrender

Shine Your light and
Let the whole world see
We’re singing
For the glory of the risen King
Jesus

Overflow

2010-01-31T12:45:00.000-08:00

The Church
For the past few weeks i've been church hopping to find which group of fellowship would fit best for me. Today i went to Granada Heights Friends Church since it's close by. I visited Grace Free Evangelical last week, plan to visit Refuge Calvary, La Mirada Calvary, and Rock Habor. And i'm sure there are dozens more around the area.

I'm glad that everywhere I go, I can meet with people who have a common identity and foundation in Christ. When people have a common focal point on worshiping Jesus and a chief end to glorify His name, it forms a loving and warm community. It's great to know i have a family in Christ. We as many form one body. The church is just a vehicle for His will. In unity we can make Christ known. The question now is, "Will you take up your cross, surrender your life, and join the revolution in following Jesus?"

Evangelism
Of coarse we're not called to only fellowship and hangout with Christians, but also called to evangelize, by spreading the gospel to the world. Today in our small young adult group we talked about the challenges of evangelism, the difficulties of it, and our perception of it. I'm glad that we as Christians are rethinking how we are to approach sharing Jesus with others. And i think the answer to effective evangelism, is to simply love on others.

I honestly don't blame others when they get defensive in their beliefs, because I can understand how Christians can impose or try to force their belief on others. This is definitely a wrong approach. I think it should be more of a process of being relational and intentional. Christians are not to go around trying to sell something. We are to witnesses of the great work God has done and is doing in our lives. We are called to shine our light in this world of darkness. The best way to start leading someone closer to Christ is to just get to know them and where they are in life. I believe the more we disciple and water the seeds that are planted, the easier it'll be sow new seeds. Not everyone will accept the message of salvation, but some will definitely land in good soil. But before we're sent off into the world, we definitely need to make sure we equip ourselves with the Holy Spirit, because salvation is entirely God's work.

Healer
I think one of the many things that attract people to Jesus is His power to heal. Everyone deep down is vulnerable to pain, loss and suffering. We have all gone through various life problems. When sin entered our world, we allowed evil to corrupt our obedience to God. Many of us carry baggage of guilt and shame of our past sins. Many look for restoration, peace, forgiveness, comfort and refuge. We all need deliverance from our sin and pain. Many of us struggle with self worth or pride. We have all fallen into this sex infested and money making world. We are diagnosed with an illness called sin. We are troubled by broken families, drugs, violence and finical burdens. Some may have lost loved ones, gone through divorces, abuse, been betrayed by a friend, or suffer through addictions. No matter who you are, you have had your hand full of problems in life. And sometimes when we go through these trials, we may feel completely alone. We constantly seek for something to mend the pain, or for someone to help us with our burdens. But again, I would like to attract your attention to the only One who can fully redeem and restore us. It is by His love that He heals us. No one can offer such a powerful love and grace as He can. This is definitely good news.

Tears of the Saints

Adultery
Today the pastor covered over the problem of stealing and adultery, which lead to the problem of sex trafficking in our world. We need to completely abolish the act of this in our world. And although we are not those who commit these crimes, we have all sinned in our hearts. The heart of our flesh often craves, lusts and desires sexual impurities. I believe we need to learn how to guard our hearts and minds of these things. There is only freedom in Christ. We need to offer our thought life to Christ, and allow Him to give us self control. We are no longer bound to a slavery of sin. Through Christ we can have victory and deliverance over these sins. We are in dire need of His purity, righteousness and holiness. We need to become desperate for His Spirit.

Exercise
Did you ever wonder why so many fitness goals never get accomplished? And why so many weight loss programs fail? A main reason is because it takes a big load of dedication and commitment. The best advice is to stay consistent in training for our goals. It's also wise to have a mentor, trainer and friends for support. These simple tools also relate to our spiritual exercise. We must practice a daily stretching of our walk with God. Keeping our eyes on Christ, and taking one step at a time will result in much growth. Sometimes one step closer is all God is asking for. Another factor would be motivation. If we find passion and purpose in achieving our goals, then we'll be ten times more efficient. Above all we need to seek the strength of God because He is the Only One who can stir up and spark our flame.

Overflow
The church i just attended spoke about an illustration of a fountain and how it overflows. This is a great symbol to how our lives need to be gushing out the love of God through the Holy Spirit. Sitting under the funnel of God's grace, and letting Him pour into our lives, not only fills us up with His love, but should also automatically flow out of our lives onto others. This whole concept is basically learning to abide in Christ, and allow this radioactive, contagious joy to leak out and splash those around us. When the Spirit of God dwells within us, we cannot help but be moved to share this amazing love with others. But this all goes back to waiting, trusting and relying on Him for that power of the Holy Spirit.

Psalm 142

"I cry aloud to the LORD;
I lift up my voice to the LORD for mercy.

I pour out my complaint before him;
before him I tell my trouble.

When my spirit grows faint within me,
it is you who know my way.
in the path where I walk
men have hidden a snare for me.

Look to my right and see;
no one is concerned for me.
I have no refuge;
no one cares for my life.

I cry to you, O LORD;
I say, "You are my refuge,
my portion in the land of the living."

Listen to my cry,
for I am in desperate need;
rescue me from those who pursue me,
for they are too strong for me.

Set me free from my prison,
that I may praise your name.
Then the righteous will gather about me
because of your goodness to me."

Consuming Fire

There must be more than this,
O breath of God come breathe within,
There must be more than this,
Spirit of God we wait for You.
Fill us anew we pray,
Fill us anew we pray.

Consuming fire fan into flame,
A passion for Your Name,
Spirit of God fall in this place,
Lord have Your way,
Lord have Your way with us,

Come like a rushing wind,
Clothe us with power from on high,
Now set the captives free,
Leave us abandoned to Your praise.
Lord let Your glory fall,
Lord let Your glory fall.

Stir it up in our hearts Lord,
Stir it up in our hearts Lord,
Stir it up in our hearts Lord,
A passion for Your Name.

Psalm 145

2010-01-27T12:50:00.000-08:00

"How sweet are your words to my taste, sweeter than honey to my mouth!" - Psalm 119:103

"Therefore, my beloved brethren, be steadfast, immovable, always abounding in the work of the Lord, knowing that your toil is not in vain in the Lord." 1 Cor 15:58

Psalm 145

"I will exalt you, my God the King; I will praise your name for ever and ever.

Every day I will praise you and extol your name for ever and ever.

Great is the LORD and most worthy of praise; his greatness no one can fathom.

One generation will commend your works to another; they will tell of your mighty acts.

They will speak of the glorious splendor of your majesty, and I will meditate on your wonderful works.

They will tell of the power of your awesome works, and I will proclaim your great deeds.

They will celebrate your abundant goodness and joyfully sing of your righteousness.

The LORD is gracious and compassionate, slow to anger and rich in love.

The LORD is good to all; he has compassion on all he has made.

All you have made will praise you, O LORD; your saints will extol you.

They will tell of the glory of your kingdom and speak of your might,

so that all men may know of your mighty acts and the glorious splendor of your kingdom.

Your kingdom is an everlasting kingdom, and your dominion endures through all generations.

The LORD is faithful to all his promises and loving toward all he has made.

The LORD upholds all those who fall and lifts up all who are bowed down.

The eyes of all look to you, and you give them their food at the proper time.

You open your hand and satisfy the desires of every living thing.

The LORD is righteous in all his ways and loving toward all he has made.

The LORD is near to all who call on him, to all who call on him in truth.

He fulfills the desires of those who fear him; he hears their cry and saves them.

The LORD watches over all who love him, but all the wicked he will destroy.

My mouth will speak in praise of the LORD. Let every creature praise his holy name for ever and ever." Amen!

Hillsong- Desert Song

Chris Tomlin - Everlasting God

God is Better

2010-01-25T20:04:00.000-08:00

Today i am reminded of many Dubble-yous (W's). Because i have an abundant time waiting for school to start, it seems God has allowed me to use this time to be more intentional with my relationship with Him. I realize that if I am to one day become a shepherd of a church or ministry, I most definitely need to start with changing and transforming myself. So anyways here's my W's blog.

1) Worship
2) Word
3) War
4) Worthy
5) Witness
6) Waiting

1) Worship
Lately God has been reminding me of Worship. Worship is not necessarily the outward expression of praise for God, although i believe there should be evidence of it. Before we can begin to worship with our actions, words, behavior and lifestyle, we must first start with our heart. I believe God cares much more about our attitude and mind set of our heart than any amount of works. We can worship at any time of the day. Worship could come in the form of a prayer, singing a song of His super awesomeness, or in a joyful heart of graditude. As we grow older and mature, we must not lose that child-like joy in the arms of the Father. It's impossible to absorb God's love and not find an explosion of joy.

Kay getting a little off track.. My point is that Worship sets the tone and mood to how we live. The intentions and thoughts of our hearts display into our actions, and then into our habits, and then into our character. So start with a heart of worship, and then you can worship God in any daily activity. Personally i notice its easier to worship Him while walking, privacy in the bathroom, or falling asleep to worship music. I would also encourage people to try and write out prayers or poems and to definitely try creating your own original worship song. I have a few mainstream worship songs i normally like to hum to, but creating your own joyful song of praise definitely helps the heart to surrender and stand in awe of Him. So try it!

2) Word
Many Christians in todays church barely touch their Bibles. The Bible is God breathed, it is His living and active Word. He speaks a kajillions of lessons straight to our heart through it, but we miss a lot of it because we don't bother to dig into His love letter. My faith bloomed back in March 2008 because that's when i first started to do daily devotions. Your life will change dramatically once you dive into God's Word, read and take hold of His promises. Heaven and Earth will pass way, but His words will never pass away.

A pastor once said, "If Jesus were to come back not for the rapture, and give one message in the largest football arena today, and it were broadcast acrossed the globe, He would hold up the Bible and say, I've already communicated everything you need to know in here." God has given us everything we need to know about salvation already, we just need to trust in His Word.

I just watched the movie "The Book of Eli", I was surprised to see that the book was the Bible. He read it everyday and did his best to memorize it. It was the last Bible on earth, and Denzel had to beat up a bunch of guys for trying to take it. But anyways, we must realize the high importance of reading the scriptures and falling under God's Word, Will and Way, lol (W's).. God gave us a law that He knew no one could obey perfectly, because it would lead to our dependence on His Son for righteousness.

3) War
In the near future and coming years I believe there will be many wars and rumors of wars. Nation will rise against nation, and kingdoms all against each other. I can't imagine what a WWIII would look like. But I do believe that before Christ comes, many more Christians will be put to trial, jailed and persecuted for their faith. Many will fall away being choked up by thorns. Many will fall into the deception of false teachers, prophets and false people claiming to be Christ. The thing is, that all these things have already begun. But Christ will not return until all His promises are fulfilled.

And since we're on the topic of war, we must also realize that their is a spiritual war at hand. Yes, God has already defeated the enemy and we have victory in His name, but we don't have to look far to find a battle of good and evil. "For though we live in the world, we do not wage war as the world does. The weapons we fight with are not the weapons of the world. On the contrary, they have divine power to demolish strongholds." 2 Cor 10:3-4

I am not surprised when I hear a broadcast of thousands of people and families getting hit with natural disasters. Earthquakes, storms, hurricanes, tsunamis and all sorts of natural disasters will only increase in the near future. I Bible tells us that in the end times, there will be darkness and chaos. The only hope that we have is in Jesus. And many people who intend to pray at the 11th hour will die at 10:30. We must get right with God now! Forgiveness of sins by God's grace can begin now! Salvation is upon us now! God grants us freedom through Christ now! Don't put off seeking God, salvation is such an urgent matter, because it will determine our eternity.

4) Worthy
So why all this talk about Worship, Jesus, Salvation, God? Because He is absolutely Worthy. Whatever you may be struggling with, just remember that God is better. Who is more worthy of praise? What sin or idol is more appealing than God? God is infinitely better. Many people want to know God and find salvation in Him, but are hindered when it comes to surrendering anything, or if it means that they have to live their life differently. The fact is that Jesus is worthy of trading everything for. Trade your filthy sin in, kill it, deny those temptations, and God continues to help us break free from the bondage of our sins. Love always conquers a multitude of sin. The more we surrender, the more we trust, and the more we look to Jesus the less we'll sin. And eventually our desires grow into a hatred for our sin and a love for righteousness. The closer we draw to Christ, the farther we get away from sin.

I think talking about how God is infinitely worthy, may be my favorite topic of this blog. We are completely ill deserving of His grace, and He is fully worthy of our entire worship. You ever come to a point in your life, where you wonder.. "Is this all there is?" Gotta go school from 1-25, then start working till 65, and then maybe retire, and finally die. Sure we can pick up some hobbies, we read a couple dozen books, watch all the latest movies, blow money on video games, collect thousands of material things, find a spouse, have a few grandchildren, and try new restaurants, and then what..? IS that it? You explore this world, work ur butt off, then just die?! Is there anything more? Anything of greater value or worth? Many of you know what im getting at. This life is a vapor, and then it's off to eternity. The question is if it's smoking or non smoking. We must choose for ourselves who we will live to glorify. Im gonna be politically incorrect by saying that Jesus is the ONLY way to heaven. Buddha can't bring us to God, Mohamed can't forgive our sins. There is only one who died for us and can bring us at right standing with God. Don't get mad at me, i dont make up these rules, you may hafta take that up with God Himself.

Anyways the reason salvation is also called the gospel, is because it's incredibly good news that God gave us Jesus as a Savior from this world. He offers such an abundant amount of love, you couldnt carry it all. And a relationship with Christ is never bland and stale, He increasily grows and works in us. We cannot afford to waste our lives, invest in things that will never last, and jus wither away. The bottom line is, that if your looking for something more, the dots don't just seem to connect, life seems empty, lonely and it's missing something, then I want you to know that there is much more, infinitely more.

Jesus gave His entire life because He wanted a relationship with His people. In this life, we all look for something. We are confused about our identity and purpose. We wonder what significance and meaning there is to life. The answer is that we were created to worship, not just worship anything, but worship the Lord. Taste and see, get a touch from Jesus, spend a minute with Him directly, try just a sample of His love i dare you. I can barely describe the explosion of flavor from just one encounter with Him.

When i was younger I thought everyone believed in God. I thought it was the norm. I didn't see how people could completely miss the universe's most mind blowing wonder of God. During my freshmen year of UH, i realized that "Wow, i didn't realize how many people lived without knowing Jesus." And i think that also played a part in God specifically telling me to go and tell them that don't know. If you find something so incredible, infinite, and holy, wouldn't you want to share that with everyone? Why keep a cure to yourself?

5) Witness
I used to conceal my faith. I used to hide my light. You probably could'nt even tell i was a Christian. Ashamed of it? Maybe. Lukewarm? Definitely. I was salt that wasnt salty. I would only pray and turn to God when i needed Him. But now, God has called me to lead people to Him. There is no greater mission, than to attract others to God's love and redemption. In fact, we who claim to be Christians are all called to serve, give, witness, disciple, worship and evangelize. But most importantly, God calls us to love Him and others. God calls us to step out of our comfort, He calls us to put our own agendas aside, He calls us to live for His Name. That is of course, if you claim to be born again and walk by the Holy Spirit. I believe our faith should be bold, courageous and contagious.

When I arrive at God's heavenly throne in the kingdom of Heaven, the first words I want to hear from God is "Well done, good and faithful servant!" What have we done with what God has entrusted us with? In Matt 25, we see how we are stewards of God's gifts. The harvest is plentiful, but the workers are few. What have we spent our lives investing into? Where do our money and time go into. God gives us the task of multiplying and sharing what we have. Have we spread the gospel that He called us to? Have we sown seeds for the harvest, or have we buried the treasure and kept it to ourselves. A pastor once told me, "You are as close to God as you want to be." What you put in, is what you get out. When i feel far off from God, its normally because i haven't spent any quality time with Him. When i feel like God isn't using me, its normally because I have chosen to indulge in other things. You become what you worship, and your relationship with God is as close as you desire it to be.

We try to rationalize, compromise and make up excuses to why we don't need to surrender everything, but the bottom line is that Jesus wants us entirely. There is a very cleaver and crafty one who is always out trying to deceive us into thinking that we don't need God. He prows around like a lion looking for those to devour. We say, "I don't need to surrender anything finical because i spend enough time serving. Or "I don't need to go to church, because i can pray at home." Yes, i've fallen into these errors firsthand. Small compromises lead to big consequences. Letting small bugs in, will lead big bugs in. Cutting corners short, and taking easy ways out in life is really cheating yourself and your integrity. Satan subtly convinces us to get away with things and compromise our faith and alliance to God. He tempts us to justify our sins, and only follow God partially. He distracts us from God, he tries to draw us away from listening God, and he also distorts our obedience to God. He tries to twist up our understanding of God, confuse our worship and he basically wants us to place our trust somewhere else. Be on gaurd, sharp with discernment, and equiped with the full armor of God.

6) Waiting
This ties into worship, but i noticed that God often tells us to just wait upon Him. Sometimes we can spend time with God without being deep in prayer. We can sit in the silence, and prepare our hearts to just listen and receive His love. Times of reflection and mediation are vital for the growth of one's soul. Similar to filling up our cars with gas, we must fill up on the Holy Spirit.

We're normally off busy with school, work and life that we forget to set aside time to just meet with God. The good Shepherd makes us lie down in green pastures and leads us beside calm and quiet waters. Turn off all your stressful problems and soak up His love. He restores, rejuvenates, replenishes, refills, and overflows our soul with His love and peace. Find great joy and delight in His grace. He's the only One who can offer such healing and restoration. So, if you're looking to dig deeper in a more intimate relationship with God, try just shutting off your loud mind and seek Him. You'll be surprised how many revelations and empowerment He gives to those who wait upon Him.

Revelation Song

Worthy is the,
Lamb who was slain
Holy, Holy, is He
Sing a new song, to Him who sits on
Heaven's Mercy Seat

Holy, Holy, Holy
Is the Lord God Almighty
Who was, and is, and is to come
With all creation I sing:
Praise to the King of Kings!
You are my everything,
And I will adore You…!

Clothed in rainbows, of living color
Flashes of lightning, rolls of thunder
Blessing and honor, strength and
Glory and power be
To You the Only Wise King,

Filled with wonder,
Awestruck wonder
At the mention of Your Name
Jesus, Your Name is Power
Breath, and Living Water
Such a marvelous mystery..

Holy, Holy, Holy
Is the Lord God Almighty
Who was, and is, and is to come,
With all creation I sing:
Praise to the King of Kings!
You are my everything,
And – I - will - adore YOU…